i Page 8077 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Athletes Being Sexually Assaulted Is Not A Refreshing Change Of Pace
As you might have heard already, a few players on the North Carolina football team had a scary incident. And make no mistake: It was a scary incident. It's one of those things that sounds funny on the surface but is actually creepier than one would think....

Najeh Davenport New Dump Truck For Steelers
The Steelers might have won last night — a loss would have been devastating to their hopes f staving off the Browns — but they lost running back Willie Parker for the rest of the year with a broken leg. (Good thing nobody plays fantasy football in Week 17.) And now only one man can save them: The Ha...

Welcome to Today's Closer ... Ladies ...
For the rest of 2007, the NHL Closer will be written by the fine folks at Melt Your Face Off. Enjoy....

Battle Of The Stars
The NBA Closer is written by our own Canadian weekend maestro J.E. Skeets. When he's not busy scouring the box scores or spelunking, he can be heard on The Basketball Jones daily podcast. Enjoy!...

About Last Night
What you missed while preparing for the Global Orgasm For Peace ... • NFL: Willie Parker will be able to use the handicapped parking space at Steelers practice all next week. Pittsburgh 41, St. Louis 24. • College football: Navy and Utah pound each other like the Monitor and the Merrimack until one ...

No More Illini For Us For A While
We're not going to any more Illini sporting events; we're gonna need something to cheer us up....

The Rams Can Cure What Ails Ya
The Steelers wouldn't actually blow this thing, would they? The team with the handsome coach and the gay mascot have looked awful the last few weeks, and now the Browns are threatening to pass them. But they wouldn't fall so far to lose to the Rams, right? Right?...

To Watch Tonight
What to watch after your shift at Carphone Warehouse ... • College football: Poinsettia Bowl, Utah vs. Navy, at San Diego (6 p.m., PT). The bowl season begins with red, leafy goodness. [ESPN] • College basketball: Pittsburgh vs. Duke, at New York (7 p.m., ET) [ESPN]; Oral Roberts vs. Oklahoma State,...

The MLS Cup Could Be Yours
The Houston Dynamo — or Dynamos; whatever — won the MLS Cup Trophy earlier this year. Way to go, guys; we're happy for you. In a way to try to promote the league and team, the Dynamo has decided to temporarily auction off the trophy....

There's Something About Mirich
I used to think that I knew what Dee Mirich was writing about. I would read her impassioned, fractured poetry on various horse racing message boards, and nod knowingly. "Yes," I would say to myself, "Angels DO prefer hitching their horses to rainbows." But lately, Dee has been listing toward crazy e...

Last Chance To Join Pants Party Bowl Group
The bowl season kicks off tonight with the Poinsettia Bowl in San Diego. Say what you will about the Internets, but they don't leave you hanging: Here's the first-ever Poinsettia Bowl Drinking Game....

The Yearly Night In The Champaign Snow
We arrived in the new generation coal plant capital of the world late last night — the mayor of Mattoon, charmingly, used to coach us in baseball — so our holiday season has already begun. And we kick it off with our yearly trip to Champaign for some Illini basketball....

Michael Vick Does Not Approve
We haven't quite wrapped our minds around this alleged news that Jonathan Papelbon's dog at the clinching ball from the World Series last year. We're not sure we believe it....

And Ladies ... He's Single
No real reason for this post, except to point out that this is possibly the most awesome image of Kyle Orton ever captured....

SHOTY Elite Eight: Pac Man Jones Vs. Sean Salisbury
As we eye that looming upset, we look at our final Elite Eight matchup....


Jamboroo, Week 16: CHRISTMASAROO!
Big Daddy Drew's Thursday Afternoon NFL Dick Joke Jamboroo previews the upcoming weekend of the NFL every, well, every Thursday afternoon....

Wrong Again, Chris
• What you suspected is true: Chris Mortensen is pretty much just guessing. [Kissing Suzy Kolber] • The return of the real Doc Rivers. [Simon On Sports] • Dave Littlefield could have been the Red Sox GM. [Mondesi's House] • Computer chips under athletes' skin? Why not? (Well ...) [100 Percent Injury...

Year In Review: August
You might remember, toward the end of last year, when we reviewed each month of the past year leading up to New Years Day. We called it, imaginatively, "Year In Review." We continue today with August. We're digging through our archives pretty well, but if you think we should definitely feature somet...

Increase Your Booty With Better Bowl Games
Who says players can't get paid? Sports Business Journal (via The Sporting Blog), has a big list of athlete schwag from each of the bowl games. It's a tasty list....