i Page 8766 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Unfortunately, They Can Only Use Their Hands
If you thought human beings were the only species with a World Cup this week ... think again, you human-centric bigots! It's the Ant World Cup!...

We Have To Ask ...
Suggested questions for today's ESPN SportsNation chatters ... • Noon. Baseball with Jayson Stark: Now it can be told: I, too, took steroids. In the break room at T.G.I. Friday's, where I work. I calmly await the authorities. • 2 p.m. Chivas USA coach Bob Bradley: You play in the Home Depot Center i...

It's A Hat! It's A Hearing Aid! It's A Utensil!
A site we'd never heard of but are now addicted to called Patently Silly takes a look at all the ridiculous "inventions" that receive patents from the goverment. Recently, they featured. something called "Multi-Purpose Headgear", from a company called Sportniks. What are the multi purposes of this...

All Right, Maybe It's Time To Panic
OK, we have clearly attempted to keep our wits about us during this whole Albert Pujols injury situation ... but we're officially out on the ledge now....

The World Cup Is Clearly Ready To Rock
We're just more than 24 hours away from the start of the World Cup, and various Deadspinners have arrived in Germany and are already casting their arrogant American eyes — as opposed to their humble American wrists — to the glory that is the world's biggest sporting event....

About Last Night ...
What you missed while trying to figure out if your child is the antichrist ... • NHL Playoffs: Someone had better inform Edmonton that this is only a best-of-seven series. 'Canes go up 2-0 behind Ward. • MLB: Carl Everett, of all people, homers in 11th to lead Mariners over Twins 11-10. • Tennis: Ra...

Strap In For The Grimsley Express
So we've been digging through this Jason Grimsley affidavit, and there's some pretty fun stuff. We understand the mindset behind what one commenter called "the missing white girl story of the week" aspect of this, but we kind of have a feeling this might stick. Some highlights:...

To Watch Tonight
What to watch as you wait to be drafted ... but don't answer the phone! • Boxing: Light welterweights, Michael Warrick (18-3-0) vs. Demetrius Hopkins (23-0-1), at Atlantic City. ... and the draw was because he scared a guy to death. [ESPN2] • MLB: Boston at New York Yankees. It occurs to us that all...

Leftovers: Hockey Ratings Disaster
• Not to scare you, but college softball is getting better ratings than the Stanley Cup Finals. [Back In Blue] • Ronaldo's girlfriend won't be posing nude. Good to know. [SI.com] • The MLB draft is hardly compelling television. [AOL CityGuide] • It's the first NBA mock draft we've linked to around h...

Not To Say He's Fragile Or Anything ...
Baseball Prospectus famously likes to proclaim that There Is No Such Thing As A Pitching Prospect; anything can happen to a young pitcher, from overuse to freak injury to lack of confidence to simple poor scouting. But it's one thing to not know if something bad is going to happen to a young pithc...

Defending Mr. Cooper
So we've been thinking about the $500,000 bond required of the victimized Mike Cooper, and we did a little search through Google News for some comparisons....

Random YouTube Finding Of The Week
We have made no secret of our obsession with Mike Tyson's Punch Out, and, specifically, our lifetime 1-2,419 record against the Tyson of the title. No excuses: We just weren't good enough....

World Cup Preview: Group B
The World Cup is almost here! So that you aren't caught flat-footed, we're previewing each group, in no particular order, to explain why your team has no chance to win (you'll thank us later). Today: Group B! If you have any thoughts on a particular group, send them to [email protected]. Our opera...

Blogdome: Look, Another Reading!
• If it's the first Wednesday of the month, it must be time for another installment of the Varsity Letters reading series. We'll be there, as always. [Varsity Letters] • Eric Gagne looked a little more hurt than he might have let on last night. [LA Observed] • It's getting ugly for all the former Tw...

Bet On The Most (And Least) Violent Fans
If you're up for some more World Cup related gambling, A Reminder invites you to play some Hooligan Fantasy Soccer. It's the Pioneer Press''s Tom Powers' favorite World Cup game! It makes it so much easier to arrest people!...

The Canadian Hide-And-Seek Team
We're not sure where this is from — we haven't nailed it down yet — but here's a funny prank, explained by the reader who sent it to us:...

Gunston Sleeps With The Fishes
The folks over at The Realests are claiming victory today, saying that they have taken out the mascot of an NCAA Basketball Final Four school in a bloodless coup. We're referring of course to Gunston, the green, furry, Muppet-like creature who until recently was the costumed mascot of George Mason...

We Have To Ask ...
Suggested questions for today's ESPN SportsNation chatters ... • Noon. World Cup with Dale Johnson: Wouldn't if be funny if Iran won the whole thing? Hello? • Noon. Boxer Bernard Hopkins: Do you think Jesus would have been a boxing fan? • 3 p.m.. Right to Play with Jim Caple: Hey, no fair crossing u...

How Not To Properly Do A Header
No one is covering the World Cup, already, better than The Guardian, and today's whimsical contribution to the cause looks at the most ridiculous haircuts in World Cup history....