ick Page 437 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Australia To Stop Using Flamethrowers After Almost Flambéeing Cricketer
Cricket Australia will no longer set off flamethrowers at its matches after nearly burning its own captain to a crisp as he attempted to retrieve a ball past the boundary line....
Colin Kaepernick's Fumble Was The Most Devastating Play Of Week 9
Week 10 starts in a few hours, so while we can, let's finish cleaning house on Week 9. Down by three with ten seconds remaining, the 49ers were one yard away from the St. Louis end zone and appeared on the verge of victory. But Colin Kaepernick fumbled in what was not only the most detrimental pla...
Derrick Rose Hurt Both Of His Ankles Again
Derrick Rose returned to the Bulls' starting lineup last night after missing the two previous games. He missed those games because he managed to sprain both of his ankles during a game last Friday. Rose played 31 minutes against the Bucks, which is great, but he also managed to re-aggravate both of ...
Patrick Reed, On His Own Putting: "You Fuckin' Faggot"
The WGC-HSBC Champions is underway in Shanghai, and things aren't going so well for golfer Patrick Reed. His reaction after three-putting the course's opening hole: "Nice fuckin' three-putt you fuckin' faggot."...
The Radio Host Who Wouldn't Stick To Sports
Matt Jones, host of Kentucky's highest-rated radio program and co-founder of the scrappily independent Kentucky Sports Radio blog, describes himself as a "somewhat liberal, mountain, Eastern Kentuckian white guy." He adds, "There aren't a lot of those." This puts him at odds with his listeners, whos...
Coach K Talks U.S. Foreign Policy With Dumb Basketball Metaphors
Mick Krizilonski was a guest speaker at the Association of the U.S. Army conference last month, and he seized on the opportunity to bemoan President Barack Obama's decision to rule out using ground troops to combat ISIS. He did this in the most annoying and Dook-ish way imaginable....
What The Most Infamous NBA Heckler Learned From His Friend Muhammad Ali
He had a role model. The most obnoxious spectator in sports history says he was inspired by the most beloved athlete of all time....
Anthony Davis Is A Goddamn Demon
Anthony Davis is going to own the league sooner rather than later, because Anthony Davis is a shot-devouring, rebound-snatching, dunking monster who is now armed with a solid mid-range jumper and respectable handles. Dunks and smooth jumpers and blocks are great, but if you really want to see what m...
Eagles Lineman Jason Peters Didn't Know Nick Foles Got Hurt
Eagles quarterback Nick Foles exited today's game in the first quarter with a collarbone injury after a tackle by Whitney Mercilus; former Jets hostage Mark Sanchez replaced him. Jason Peters, however, didn't immediately know about the switch, so he was in for a shock when he realized Foles didn't t...
Derrick Rose Actually Sprained <em>Both</em> His Ankles Last Night
Turns out Derrick Rose left last night's game not due to just one sprained ankle, but both! ...
Derrick Rose Knocked Out Of Game Due To Injury, Again
We insist this is not a repeat: Derrick Rose left tonight's game against the Cavaliers after suffering an injury on the court....
Which Hoodie Brings Bill Belichick The Most Success?
Mike Dussault, also known as @PatsPropaganda, looked through 160 games since 2003 and tracked the types of hoodies worn by Bill Belichick to determine which one yielded the best record. He also specified hoodies with and without sleeves cut off. We thank him for his hard work....
Nick Young Dressed Up As The Best <em>Chappelle's Show</em> Sketch
Let's take this opportunity to clarify something: The best Chappelle's Show sketch was Charlie Murphy's stories about Rick James. There's no need to be contrarian about this....
Bill Belichick Is Fed Up With All These Wrong-Ass Meteorologists
At today's press conference, somebody asked Patriots head coach Bill Belichick if he ever takes the weather forecast into account when game planning, and Belichick responded by going on a sustained grumble-rant about how shitty weather forecasters are at their jobs....
Cubs Fire Rick Renteria After One Season, Admit He Got Fucked
After Joe Maddon unexpectedly left the Tampa Bay Rays, the Cubs worked quickly to cut a deal and bring him on. Current skipper Rick Renteria, a baseball lifer in his first-ever major league managing gig, got the shaft, and president Theo Epstein admitted as much in today's press release....
The Kings Introduced The Warriors With The <em>Full House</em> Theme
Visiting teams are used to getting booed during the introductions of their starting lineups. So maybe, the Sacramento arena crew figured, they might be thrown off by getting laughed at. At Wednesday's opener, they cued up the Full House theme music to welcome the Bay Area squad....
This Is One Of The Most Unfortunate Headlines We've Ever Seen
Hey, you guys remember Mark Whicker? The guy who wrote what is unquestionably the worst sports column of all time? Well, now he can add this headline to his collection of editorial facepalms....
BAH GAWD, KING, HE DROPPED HIM WITH THE SUPLEX
That's an offensive player!...
Bill Belichick Likely To Study Tape Of His Slaying Of Reporter
We've gone over this before, but Bill Belichick's adept at letting reporters draw out their questions before he shuts them down with curt answers. (It's entertaining, if your job isn't covering the Patriots.) Naturally, the media wanted to talk about Peyton Manning vs. the Patriots today, and Belich...