ick Page 580 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Everyone Still Baffled By This Ricky Rubio Business
So Rubio's contract was either bought out by Regal Barcelona or it wasn't, depending on whether you believe Spanish media or the guy in Minnesota who took, like, 18 point guards in the last draft. [USAT, Marca via Babelfish]...

Ichiro To Drop Panties With Slap Hitting
Now is the time to dismiss any misconceptions you may harbor about about Ichiro's sexuality vis a vis his affinity for Griffey-tickling. Ichiro digs the ladies, and would like to call on those with a fetish for low slugging percentage....

Rick Pitino Has Had It With You Lying Liars
Earlier today, police released videotapes of the interviews with Karen Sypher where she accused Rick Pitino of all that bad stuff. Well, Pitino did not like that one bit and he's got the angry press conference rant to prove it....

The Confessions Of An NBA Scorekeeper
"I went into the NBA as bright-eyed and bushy-tailed as I could get," Alex says. "I loved the game. I didn't want to taint it." Of course, that was before Alex did all those "bad, bad, bad" things....

This Man Will Not Defecate For Less Than Your Annual Salary
Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and the blogosphere to bring you everything you need to know to start your day....

Dirk Nowitzki's Possibly Pregnant Lady Friend Gets Very Real Jail Time
Cristal Taylor was sentenced to four years in prison for violating her probation, which means Dirk Nowitzki's love child (if it indeed exists) could be born in jail. That kid's going to have a story to tell. [Post-Disptach/Blogitude]...

Narcing On Michael Vick And His Fruity Alcoholic Beverage
Vick was recently spotted sipping a fruity and legal adult beverage, a non-story in any league that isn't run by a guy who thinks he's Father Flanagan in Boys Town, which is to say, any league but Roger Goodell's NFL....

Big Ben Hurt; You May Commence Panicking
Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and the blogosphere to bring you everything you need to know to start your day....

Favre's "Gunslinger" Rating In Madden Is Off The Charts
OK fanboys, fess up. When you heard a certain QB was joining the Vikings, the first thing you wondered was what his ratings in Madden will be. Here's your answer, plus Favre's ratings on a few hypothetical categories....

Jericho Scott Redux
"Some parents contend that a 13-year-old youth football player was kicked off his team because he's too good of a player." Sigh. [The Indy Channel, True/Slant]...

Dick's Conflicted Over Vick Jersey Sales
The popular sporting goods chain store is waiting to "evaluate the reaction of Eagle fans" before they put Vick #7 jerseys their racks. [Fox Philly via AnimalNY]...

Insensitive NFL Sells Brett Favre Dog Jerseys!
OMG, you guys! Can you believe the Minnesota Vikings are such cold heartless bastards that they would profit off the pain of animals by selling personalized dog jerseys! It's almost like they don't care how ridiculous your pets look!...

How To Get A Woman To Start Thinking Divorce At Her Wedding
Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and the blogosphere to bring you everything you need to know to start your day....

Paper Tigers: Memphis Didn't Win Those Things They Won
Your new NCAA record-holder for most wins in a season: the four teams that used to hold it before Memphis won 38 in 2007-08. That's because Memphis has to vacate all of them, plus their Final Four appearance....

Don't Give Out Second Chances Unless You Brought Enough For Everybody
Of all the people to whine about the Michael Vick signing, the most unlikely is Dan Leone, the former game-day employee who was fired after venting his frustations with the team on his Facebook page. Yet here we are....

Deadspin I-Team: Who Is Rick Reilly's Virtual Bodyguard?
Avid readers of Rick Reilly®'s Wikipedia entry might've noticed a recent change: It is now, in every sense of the word, toothless....

Nick Schuyler Explains What Went Wrong
The lone survivor of the boating accident that took the lives of three football players gave his first news interview since being rescued from the waters of the Gulf of Mexico in March....

Why Your Team Sucks: New Orleans Saints
Some people are fans of the New Orleans Saints. But many, many more people are NOT fans of the New Orleans Saints. This 2009 Deadspin NFL team preview is for those in the latter group....

The Greatest H-O-R-S-E Shot You'll See All Year
That's K-State guard Denis Clemente doing a credible impression of the Bird/Jordan "Nothing But Net" McDonald's commercials....

Cruel, Inhumane Sport Continues To Demand Penance From Cruel, Inhumane Dogfighter
Michael Vick spoke with the creases of James Brown's forehead yesterday. Again we were treated to the spectacle of a man who has profited off a brutal, inhumane sport nonetheless claiming the moral high ground. I refer to James Brown....