ick Page 598 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
ESPN Trots Out "Quite Frankly" For Old White People
Awful Announcing reveals that Rick Reilly will finally get the consistent face-time to justify his $17 million ESPN contract. America, lock up your Ed Hardy T-shirts and your dental metaphors because "Homecoming" is here....
Octogenarian Writer Leaves Rickey Henderson Off HOF Ballot; Hilarity Ensues
Rickey Henderson is a lock to be voted into the Baseball Hall of Fame, but will he be the first-ever unanimous selection? Sadly, no ... thanks to this man!...
Horrible Celtics Lose Again
Paul Pierce crab dribbled his way out of bounds in overtime and Charlotte handed the putrid Boston Celtics their fifth loss in seven games. Why did anyone ever think this team was good?...
Peyton Manning Won't Be Twittering Anytime Soon
"It's not the right fit for Peyton, he's not that spontaneous. If Peyton did it he would plan it all out and make sure he did the best - he wouldn't have any typos." [NYT]...
Dick Vitale Declares For The NBA
Not content with running roughshod over the world of college basketball, Dickie V is taking his considerable, um ... "talents" to the next level, as he will call the Miami-Denver game for ESPN this Wednesday....
The Boston Celtics Dynasty Has Collapsed
Everybody panic! The once dominant Celtic steam engine has gone completely off the rails and it's unclear if they'll be able to save their season after losing to... oh my... the New York Knicks?...
Mike Patrick Has A Plaxidental Brain Fart On Air
ESPN play-by-play man Mike Patrick made a groan-inducing little comment during last night's Georgia/Michigan State Capital One Bowl, but does not appear to be in jeopardy of publicly apologizing for it....
The Year In ... Substance Abuse
It's the final day of our end-of-year retrospectives, as Charles Barkley gets in just under the wire with his arrest on suspicion of DUI. Today: Substance abuse!...
Something Goes Right In Dallas For A Change
A 70-41 third-quarter lead is pretty much safe, right? It should go without saying that if you're the Minnesota Timberwolves, the answer is no. [NBCSports]...
Last Minute Christmas Gift Ideas For The Lazy And Insane
Christmas is two days away and you've done zero shopping; nice going, jerk. Fortunately it's not too late to surprise the kids with Inflatable Ben Wallace, the basketball defender aide....
LeBron: Don't Start Printing Those #23 Knicks Jerseys Just Yet
Not sure if you've heard, but the summer of 2010 is a rather important one in the NBA....
Patrick Willis Lives In A Land Of Confusion
I'd like to say that 49ers linebacker Patrick Willis is the most underrated defensive player in the NFL, but the guy has been to two straight Pro Bowls, so someone's noticing....
The Sports Fella Unleashes Another Not-So-Subtle Dig At Rick Reilly
Yesterday revealed the enormous amounts of Bill Simmons-related email sent to Deadspin and, true to form, more Bill Simmons conspiracy theories started rolling in immediately after it was published....
Stephon Marbury Just Can't Stop Smiling, Making Knicks Uncomfortable
The Deadspin Morning Video Wake Up Call needs your help. If you have any suggested videos to fill this space, email us. Subject: Morning Video Wake Up Call...
Maybe He Should Change His Name To Phil Dawsome
When asked how it felt to eclipse the franchise record for most field goals in a season, Phil Dawson, kicker of the 4-10 Cleveland Browns, said: "There's an old saying back in Texas that says, 'You know that white speck on top of chicken poop? It's still chicken poop.' " [Philly.com](bottom graph)...
The Cruel Emasculation Of Josh Howard
Everybody remembers when Josh Howard brought some unwanted attention to the Mavericks for going rogue on Michael Irvin's radio show by extolling the virtues of weed and admitted smoking it during the off-season....
Buzzer-Beaters Of The Gods ... Plus, Post-Game Microphone Carnage
Who hasn't dreamed at one time or another of doing this? The long 3 to win it ... ohhhhh! They're going crazy at the Carrier Dome! (Your fantasy may or may not include topless cheerleaders)....
LA Times Writer Makes Big Smurfing Mistake
Los Angeles Times' Mark Heisler calls Mavericks' guard Jose Juan Barea a "Mexican Smurf" in his power rankings. Funny, except that Barea is Puerto Rican. [LAist]...
Tiger Is Not Amused
Tiger Woods responds to comments made by his caddie, Steve Williams, about Phil Mickelson. Someone's not getting their usual tip, methinks. [NBCSports]...