ill Page 694 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Jack Trudeau Likes Alcohol ... Policemen, Not So Much
It's that time of year. The kids are graduating from high school, and former Colts quarterbacks are getting them shitfaced. It seems like just yesterday, it was me donning the cap and gown, getting my diploma, and Jeff George threatening to beat my ass if I couldn't do a keg stand for 45 seconds....
Gators Deal With The Loss Of Billy Boy
Now that Billy Donovan has officially left the Florida Gators for the Orlando Magic — and EDSBS has been quiet so far — we thought we'd ask the biggest Gators fan we knew, Dan Shanoff, to describe how he's feeling. Here are his words....
Mark Cuban Has A Thing For Girdle Pads
Finally, a pro football league with second-rate players which plays on Friday nights in places like San Antonio and Sacramento. It's like someone has been recording our dreams!...
The Otters Are No Longer Satisfied With Their Jug Band Christmas
Beware, everyone: The otters have finally had enough of centuries of human dominance and have banded together to destroy us. It was only a matter of time. We welcome our new otter overlords....
It Tastes Like The Back Of A LA School Bus
Ever wonder what it would be like to see Manny Ramirez savor the aroma of fine wine? (Manny, that's not grape juice ... Manny ... Manny ....) Get yourself to Yawkey Way tomorrow to see three Red Sox show off their new wines. It will be nice to see Schilling use a spit cup for something other than ch...
When It's Time For Mr. Met To Party, It's Time To Party Hard
You thought A-Rod was the only New York baseball personality out partying with attractive ladies all weekend? You clearly forgot about Mr. Met....
The Spurs, And The Playoffs, Are All About The Flop
If you needed concrete proof why many NBA fans have been dreading seeing the Spurs in the NBA Finals, last night's win over the Jazz provided it. It was a succession of flops, plods, slaps, free throws and Manu Ginobili. We know some just call this winning basketball; we think it's sucking all the l...
For Multiple Reasons, Your Jose Canseco Rated Rookie Card Is Worth Nothing
I imagine there are a lot of Deadspinners out there who collected baseball cards in the late 80s and early 90s, the height of the baseball card collecting boom ... the time of Upper Deck, Score, the extra-long Bowmans that didn't fit into the plastic sleeves, etc. And, of course, the infamous "fuck ...
Bill Clement, You Sly Son Of A Bitch
Goodness. I hope that's not how he told his mom "Happy Mother's Day."...
Perhaps This Was What Drugged George Foreman
So, in Cincinnati, this dad and his son decided to move their punching bag, and, on a whim, figured they'd find out, you know, what's actually in a punching bag....
Tom Verducci Really, Really Wants To Play Baseball
You might remember, from a couple of years ago, when Sports Illustrated baseball guru Tom Verducci played for five days with the Toronto Blue Jays during spring training. It was a clever idea, and well-written, as was his piece this year about serving as an umpire. But, like an athlete who has been ...
Shane Victorino And His Skirt Can Be On Your Dashboard
Pity poor Shane Victorino. The Phillies outfielder/journeyman is being honored with his own figurine at a Phillies game on June 3, which has to be a thrill for any major league baseball player. (It was certainly a thrill for Mr. Celery!) Why Shane Victorino? Well, he's Hawaiian, and that makes him u...
Naked People Are Funny
Nothing beats a good streaker, kids, particularly when it's a Philadelphia streaker. And we're not particularly envious of that usher either....
The Return Of Tecmo Bowl
We don't know how we missed this piece of news yesterday, but The Fanhouse has the scoop: They're bringing back Tecmo Bowl!...
Bill Simmons Is Ready For His Closeup
This week has been when the television networks all release their plans for next fall, called "upfronts," letting the media know what they'll be rotting viewers brains with for the next calendar year. ESPN is no different; Tuesday, they announced their plans for late 2007, and they're clearly taking...
Lastings Milledge, Scaring All The White Mets Fans
In the annals of ridiculous Lastings Milledge photos, this one, from the New York Daily News blog, is a rather classic one: It's like if Outkast met Cliff Huxtable....
Baseball Players Are Athletes
Seriously, what happened to Antonio Alfonseca? He was always big, but ... wow. We suppose you can eat faster when you have six fingers....
Reintroducing Jack Cust
Anyone who has paid attention the world of sabermetrics and Baseball Prospectus over the last few years is probably familiar with Jack Cust. For years, he was that supposed slugging Colorado catcher we were all waiting to take over the National League, the guy we hoped no one else in our fantasy lea...