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Good News: This Avocado-Wielding Bodega Assailant Is Actually Not An Independent-League Baseball Player

If you enjoy news about avocados, daily life in the Bronx, or unorthodox objects used as weaponry—or any combination of the above—you’re likely familiar with the video clip below. It shows two men attacking a bodega worker by throwing avocados at him, breaking his jaw and leaving him with cuts across his face. The…