it Page 1562 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Last Chance For SHOTY Final Four Voting
Welcome back, everybody. It's 2009. Crazy. Time to make your voice heard, while you can....

Mike Patrick Has A Plaxidental Brain Fart On Air
ESPN play-by-play man Mike Patrick made a groan-inducing little comment during last night's Georgia/Michigan State Capital One Bowl, but does not appear to be in jeopardy of publicly apologizing for it....

Your New Year’s Day Bowlkakke
Wake up, shitheads! Time for you to get up, swallow 15 Advil, put your pants back on, and stagger home like the dirty, filthy people you are. Here are the bowl games you’ll need to nurse that hangover…...

NFL Baby Mama Drama To Close Out 2008
If there are any athletes out there who want to get a domestic disturbance incident in before the end of the year—save it. The store is closed....

Jason Garrett Realizes It Might Actually Be Colder In The Big D
Jason Garrett was considered the ginger-haired offensive genius, primed and ready for any and all head coaching positions — especially the one in Dallas....

If You Can, Everyone Please Go See Your Grandmothers, Right Now
I went home for Christmas, and I dropped by and saw my grandmother. She's a very nice lady....

SHOTY Final Four: Isiah Thomas Vs. Baby Mangino
The second Final Four matchup is here; there is no third-place game, because third place games are for losers....

The Agony (And Ecstasy) Of Wide Right
I hate family shots. These people don't deserve to be on TV and their painful miming and hysterical tears contribute absolutely nothing to any telecast....

Crimson Tide Suspends Top Tackle
Alabama's All-World tackle Andre Smith has been suspended and will not play in the Sugar Bowl. Ironically, he plans to work out his frustrations by eating an entire bowl of sugar. [Tide Corner]...

The Year In ... Parents Gone Wild
So, the next few days will be chock full of end-of-year retrospectives. We'll do our own as well. Today: Parents gone wild....

What do you think Natalie Gulbis' Twitter would read like?
"Monica Seles arrives to the boat! yeah! everyone is here now i will send pictures tomorrow!" Exactly. [Natalie Gulbis Twitter]...

SHOTY Final Four: Buzz Bissinger Vs. Erin Andrews
Welcome back, everybody. Some of you worked last Friday, some of you still aren't back at work today. But whatever, it's SHOTY time, time to wake up, people....

Detroit's Rod Marinelli Receives Least Surprising Firing Ever
The Detroit Lions are... undefeated. They lost all 16 games in impressive fashion this year, and even though coach Rod Marinelli says he's ready to lose 16 more, he has officially been let go....

This Pretty Much Sums Up What 0-16 Looks Like
Got an image you'd like to see in here first thing in the morning? Send it to [email protected]. Subject: Morning crap...

MMA Fighter Justin Eilers Shot Dead in "Domestic Disturbance" on Christmas
MMA heavyweight Justin Eilers was found dead Christmas night in Nampa, ID, with a .45 bullet in his chest....

Guess Who?
Guess who kept the coin from the final coin flip at Texas Stadium? Hint: He's a former Cowboy and he likes to collect shiny things. [Dallas Morning News]...

How Texas And Oklahoma Fight For Football Recruits
Everyone knows recruiting for big time college football programs is a shady business, but it's instructive to occasionally be reminded what schools and players go through on the road to a letter of intent....

Mike Tomlin Thinks Your Holiday Gimmicks Are Stupid And Tiresome
Apparently, Steelers coach Mike Tomlin's harmless "if it will get you out of here" to this man dressed in a red suit has resulted in this AP story making him out to be a joyless anti-Santa. It's purely coincidental Steelers announced that there will be no more visits from Santa during press conferen...

Everyone Hates The Yankees ... Except For Stephen A.
So the Yankees back up a dump truck and cover Mark Teixeira with money, causing former Baseball Commissioner Bowie Kuhn to start whirling dirvishly in his grave. Here's some further reaction:...

Everybody Hates Shaun Smith
“He never shuts the f–k up,” a source told us last month, “and he acts like he has been to 25 Pro Bowls.” [PFT]...