it Page 1602 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Arizona Cannot Be Stopped
Brandon Webb didn't have his best performance of the year, but he can thank Augie Ojeda for helping him notch a seventh consecutive win. The Arizona reserve filled in mightily for the injured Orlando Hudson, driving in six of the runs in the 10-4 win over the Mets. Ojeda had three hits, including tw...

Hornets Tell It Like It Is, Spurs Fall to Pieces
I immediately regret that headline. Anyway, New Orleans opened their series against San Antonio in style with an ass kicking of impressive proportions. The Spurs held a four point lead after the first quarter, but once the mascot lit the floor on fire the Hornets outscored the visitors by 23. Tim D...

BWI Isn't Just a Crappy Airport In Maryland
Cedric Benson, the oft-maligned running back of the Chicago Bears, was arrested last night by the Lower Colorado River Authority (the LAPD of southwest waterways) after being stopped for suspicion of boating while intoxicated. The 25 year-old was hosting between 12 and 15 guests on his 30-foot boat...

About Last Night
What you missed while setting New Orleans on fire... • NBA: For some reason the New Orleans Hornet attempted to jump through a ring of fire in between the first and second quarter. Once they put out the fire the Hornets couldn't be stopped. • Boxing: Oscar de la Hoya dispatched of Stevie Forbes with...

Leeeeet's Get Ready to Spar!
Oscar de la Hoya and Steve Forbes are set to face off at the Home Depot Center in Carson, California, for some reason that nobody can quite explain. I'm not about to turn down a chance to see one of the sport's greatest competitors fight a weak opponent, but in a year that's been packed with incred...

Death Looms Over Churhill Downs
The death of Eight Belles - the second place finisher in today's Kentucky Derby - makes it pretty difficult to get all that excited over Big Brown's dominating performance. The commentators love to speak of the beauty and humanity of these creatures, yet nobody seemed to mind celebrating before the ...

To Watch Tonight
What to watch while wondering if the new statue at Staples Center will sport fishnets... • Oscar de la Hoya vs. Steve Forbes. Check back in later tonight. [HBO] • The Detroit Pistons host the Orlando Magic in the first game of the NBA Playoff's second round. The first round should be wrapping up any...

They're Ready to Run For the Roses
The little people are mounting their steeds, which means the most exciting two minutes in sports (setting aside the final two minutes in almost all other highly contested sporting events) can't be far behind. Oh wait, they're playing "My Old(e?) Kentucky Home. This could take a while. Hey, an ex-boy...

Papa John Is Persona Non Grata In Ohio
• Papa John's put their logo on a "Crybaby" t-shirt and LeBron fans are pissed. Don't worry John, they'll cave soon enough. Where else will they get their recommended daily supply of garlic butter sauce? [100% Injury Rate via So Good] • If she was a better boxer she wouldn't have needed the ice scra...

Inside the Infield at Churchill Downs
Just because you don't really give a crap about horse racing doesn't mean you shouldn't be enjoying yourself like the happy-go-lucky types at the OTB. The Kentucky Derby is really just one huge ass party divided in two parts. The rich guys and southern belles cougars wear their most ridiculously ex...

The Updated Story on Marvin Harrison
Details remain scant out of Philadelphia following a shooting outside of Playmakers, Marvin Harrison's establishment in North Philadelphia. The Indianapolis wide receiver has been questioned by police as part of the investigation, but he is not considered a suspect at this time....

For Your Afternoon Viewing Pleasure
• Her. • 3:00 — Golf: Wachovia Championship, Third Round. No Tiger, but a talented leaderboard nonetheless. [CBS] • 3:00 — Horses: Kentucky Derby. Post time is 6:00 pm. [NBC] • 3:00 — Horses: Live at the Derby. Every time I turn it on the dog starts barking. It's either the horses or Kenny Mayne's e...

Footballers and the Porn Stars Who Love Them
Earlier in the week Chelsea celebrated their Champion's League semi-final triumph (don't tell Jose) over Liverpool with a field trip to popular London night spot. Needless to say, their presence did not go unnoticed by fellow club enthusiasts....

Sacha Baron Cohen's New Guy Is Tall
Wait a minute, where did all of those Hawks fans come from?...

Free Darko On Detroit-Orlando
We're looking at every NBA Playoff series through the eyes of both Free Darko. Here's Free Darko's look at the Cleveland Cavaliers-Washington Wizards series. Your author is Dr. Lawyer IndianChief....

United Move Closer, Lose Nani
Manchester United dominated West Ham en route to a 4-1 victory, holding off Chelsea for another week. Ronaldo netted a double for the Red Devils before his countryman Nani received a red card for a blatant headbutt to Lucas Neill's nose. Now Nani will be forced to sit out the final match of the seas...

Skip to My St. Lou'
Skip Schumaker lifted the Cardinals to a dramatic 11th inning victory over the Cubs with one of the night's two walk-off homers (video of the other one after the jump). The unlikely hero got just enough of Chad Fox's offering to send it over the wall for the 5-3 victory, and saving from Jason Isrin...

Your Derby Morning Horsey Preview
This may come as a surprise to some, given my affinity for sports nobody else likes, but I don't know dick about horse racing. That's why I've brought in reader Randy King to provide a little bit of knowledge while we wait to lose lots of money. His words are after the jump....

About Last Night
What you missed while wondering if Tim Donaghy was so bad after all... • NBA: The Cavs knocked the Wizards out of the playoffs, and I don't really want to talk about it right now. • Boxing: Andre Dirrell got his balls back, and remained undefeated, with a stylish stoppage over Anthony Hanshaw. More ...

All Hail Kobe... Except for Shaq
I am interrupting your precious Friday night to bring you some breaking news (if you're reading this on your blackberry's rss prepared to not get laid... again). Kobe Bean Bryant has been declared the Most Valuable Player of the National Basketball Association for the first time in his all-encompa...