it Page 1736 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

The Pain Of Life As A Royals Fan
We watched all three Cardinals-Royals games over the weekend, on the Royals television affiliate — which had a charming, low rent, public access, Wayne's World feel — and we can say with as much certainty as we can muster that the Royals are the worst team we've seen in a long, long time. It's not...

LeBron Finally Runs Out Of Magic Dust
As much as we loved the idea of LeBron James swooping from the heavens and lifting his team, all by his lonesome, into the conference finals and beyond, yesterday's easy win by the Pistons was pretty much inevitable. When you team is essentially just one player, and that one player scores only six p...

No, I'm Sorry, You Can't Get A Witness
A competitive first half gave way to a Detroit smothering in the second half, and the Detroit Pistons have advanced in the Eastern Conference playoffs. LeBron James had 27 total, but was held to just 6 points in the second half. Of course, those 6 points did account for over 25% of the Cavs total ...

Wichita State Needs A New Mascot
They're not renaming themselves, thankfully, they just want to replace the guy on the left there. When I first saw the headline, I feared that the people at Wichita State had gotten tired of all the jokes that make people like us so happy. But that's not the case, and besides, changing to somethin...

Life Keeps Kicking Pitt Kicker
If you can find time today, send some positive thoughts out to Pitt Panthers kicker David Abdul. He's currently undergoing tests to see if he has a genetic heart condition like the one that required his brother to undergo surgery. But that's just the most recent thing he's been through. Observe......

This Feels... Big.
The Pistons and Cavs will be tipping off any minute now. I can't be sure of what, but we're about to witness something. I think just about everyone in the universe is rooting for the Cavs, with the exception of hardcore Pistons fans. Everyone either wants to see LeBron win, or wants to see LeBron...

We're Goin' Streakin'!
A reader sent in a tip regarding a streaker at the Royals/Cardinals game Friday night. The streaker, a tattooed, mohawked Cardinals fan in boxer shorts, stole the 1985 Royals World Series flag, ran into left field, and, according to the tipster, was then beaten down by a combination of police, the...

Revisiting The Chicago Bitch Slap
Clearly, there are not many people out there who feel bad about A.J. Pierzynski getting punched in the face. Sporlitics thanks Michaell Barrett for "doing something the rest of the world has wanted to do for a long, long time." They also provide a brief list of reasons why Pierzysnki deserved to b...

Brian Bellows Is A Superstar
I hate to cheat on YouTube, but we’re going to close today with this Google Video. It’s Kevin Stevens and Bryan Trottier of the Penguins harassing Brian Bellows of the Minnesota North Stars... and for some reason, I can’t stop watching this. I can’t thank the Airing of Grievances enough for the find...

If You Want To Throw Down In Fisticuffs, Fine.
White Sox catcher A.J. Pierzynski plowed into Cubs catcher Michael Barrett at the plate, and Barrett felt that it was an inappropriate touch. He got up, wrapped Pierzynski up in a little hug so they could chat for a quick second, and then he popped him in the face. It was a short right cross that ...

And The Ones Get Sevens...
Screw "About Last Night!" After a night of basketball like that, it can be demoted to the two-spot......

LeBron Goes For It All Tonight
No. 1 email we've received over the last 48 hours: "Hey, asshead, still think LeBron's playoff debut is unremarkable?" (Answer: OK, maybe he's doing all right.)...

Record For Stuffing Face With Pig Ass In Jeopardy
You're probably going to make fun of us here, but we consider competitive eating a sport. We do. We never had until we worked with writer Larry Getlen on his story "The Champions Of Consumption" for The Black Table, our old stomping grounds. The two-part series looked at the history of competitive...

Danny Almonte Is Way Too Eager To Be An Adult
Remember Danny Almonte, the dominant Little League World Series star from The Bronx from a few years who turned out to be two years older than the maximum age? Well — at this should make anyone who remembers the Almonte business feel extremely old — he just got married ... and she's 11 years older...

We Are All Stunned
Well. It's little wonder the The NBA Is Back! platitudes are being brought back out there. This is downright fun....

LeBron's Chance To Take Over
Well, for those of you who are just now waking up from that Clippers-Suns epic last night, there's no time to rest, people. Two more games tonight, with the Mavericks trying to finish off the defending champions and, most compellingly, LeBron James and the Cavaliers continuing their unlikely quest...

Dirk Nowitzki Gets His Hasselhoff On
We suppose, had we put two and two together, we could have seen this coming. In a way, it has a certain spectacular cosmic inevitability....

Neil Everett's Death Wish
We're not sure whether or not to think Neil Everett is:...

Somehow ... The Series Is TIED?
As we wait for Mark Cuban to sleep off what is almost certainly an enormous (and well-earned) hangover, we turn our morning attentions to LeBron James and the Cleveland Cavaliers. (No offense to the Mavericks, of course; we are one step closer to the sublime possibility of David Stern handing the ...