its Page 44 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
John Wall Is Good At Basketball, Is Better Showman
When he isn't dancing, John Wall plays some exciting point guard. Here's video of him splitting the defense not once, but twice and finishing with an absurd 360-degree lay up during a recent Wizards scrimmage. [Wizards Extreme; via D.C. Sports Blog]...
This Is A Photo Of Danzig Wearing A Danzig Shirt After Buying Cat Supplies
Glenn Danzig is Glenn Danzig from the band Danzig. Therefore, it is surreal to see Glenn Danzig wearing a t-shirt that promotes the band Danzig. It is doubly surreal when Glenn Danzig of the band Danzig wears a Danzig t-shirt while carrying—or possibly returning—various cat supplies....
Poonami: Brooklyn Canal Turns Into Literal River Of Human Shit
The Gowanus Canal, which has already tested positive for gonorrhea, ran brown with human waste after this month's tornado. It's like the eleventh plague of Egypt, only, you know, poop. [via Brownstoner]...
Werner Herzog's Thrilling Car Accident Rescue Story Has Been Animated
Saying Werner Herzog is interesting is an understatement. He gives that Dos Equis Guy a serious run for his money in the Interesting Department. Here's an animated version of the time he saved Joaquin Phoenix from a hideous car wreck. [Kottke]...
"Look At The Tree" Tornado Video Is The East Coast's "Double Rainbow"
So, we had a tornado here in New York yesterday evening. Most people took it in stride. These bros in Brooklyn freaked right the fuck out. Let's enjoy....
Bernie Kosar Has Taken His Talents to Cleveland Traffic Court
So, former Cleveland Browns QB Bernie Kosar got pulled over by the law a couple weeks back. He apparently struck a cop's motorcycle while U-Turning his Range Rover....
Melo, D-Wade, Cubes and Nolan Ryan All Sued By Crazy Prisoner
Jonathan Lee Riches, in prison for wire fraud, spends all his time filing lawsuits against public figures. This week sees a new one, involving a number of prominent sports stars, and it is a doozy....
Incongruous Athlete Mix-Tape Theater: Toni Kukoc
Welcome to Incongruous Athlete Mix-Tape Theater, the frequent feature where we examine fan-made video love letters to athletes and their baffling soundtrack choices. Today's superstar: the Croatian Sensation, Toni Kukoc, set to Michael Jacksons's "Remember The Time."...
The University Of Miami's Jose Canseco Arrives, Shocks No One
Nevin Shapiro—an alleged Ponzi schemer and ex-University of Miami booster—is threatening to publish a tell-all book about the program. It'd be like that movie The Program, but with less James Caan and more fiduciary malfeasance. Or something along those lines....
Bengals Cheerleader Does Not Have Venereal Diseases, Court Says
Holy gonorrhea! Bengals cheerleader Sarah Jones won $11 million from a libel suit against The Dirty.com, which ran an item alleging she was all jacked-up with STD's courtesy of her bed-hopping ex-boyfriend. Not so.[Cincinnati.com]...
For Fuck's Sake, Bama Fans
Tide fans spend way too much time debating whether this cloud looks like Bear Bryant, or maybe "Abe Lincoln on a personal watercraft." Way to live up to your stereotypes, folks. [ABC33, via EDSBS]...
All The News That's Fit To Analogize Ridiculously To Food
Your food metaphor of the day, courtesy The New York Times: "We all know the cliché that a prosecuting attorney can persuade a grand jury to indict a ham sandwich, but Clemens — and Barry Bonds, with his trial scheduled for next March — are not mere ham sandwiches but rather the prime beef of baseba...
Community College Baseball Player Has The Heart Of A Champion
Alec Cortez, of San Bernardino Valley College, sent this video to more than 100 schools, just looking for a chance to show of his skills. And what skills they are....
Former Aspiring Olympian Files Sex-Abuse Suit Against US Swimming, Coach
The USA Swimming sex scandal deepens, what with former Olympic hopeful Jancy Thompson talking to ABC News about filing a sexual-misconduct lawsuit. It includes accusations of being forced to wear a dog collar....
Circle of Life: When English Soccer Appears, American Beach Volleyball Disappears
Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and internets to bring you everything you need to know to start your day....
Sean Salisbury Drops His Lawsuit Against Gawker Media, Me
Hear ye. The lawsuit brought forth by an aggrieved former NFL quarterback and television analyst against a Bully Blogger and Bully Blog Shop, in Denton County, Texas, for the past several months, is no more....
Best News Lede Ever? Best News Lede Ever.
"A German court on Tuesday threw out the case of a schoolteacher against a pupil who allegedly tormented her by scrawling pictures of rabbits on the blackboard to aggravate her rabbit phobia." [The Local] (H/T Tom K.)...
Baby Eating Way Out Of Watermelon Encapsulates The Human Cond—Awwwwwww!
Edible time-out? Funtime/dinnertime mashup? Emerging pod person? All we know is—awwwwwww! [via ExtraHotTrainaMustardClicks]...
They've Got High Apple Pie In The Sky Hopes!
Oh, the simple pleasures of a two-and-a-half-sport town. The LeBron shrine is not even entirely ash yet, and this nugget emerges from the Cleveland Browns public-relations machine:...