ja Page 393 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
CBS Airs Jags Fan's Halftime Adjustments
The music bed is what makes this, really....
Utah Drives 93 Yards In Final Five Minutes To Beat USC
USC’s woes continued tonight as the Trojans allowed Utah to drive 93 yards while eating up nearly all of the 5:37 remaining on the clock on the way to a Troy Williams touchdown pass to Tim Patrick, the fifteenth play in a remarkable series that featured two fourth downs and multiple penalties....
How The Hell Do The Patriots Do It?
Bill Belichick and Josh McDaniels are rightly being universally praised for the game plan that resulted in last night’s complete ass whupping of the incompetent Texans. But the Patriots’ 3-0 start with a pair of inexperienced quarterbacks not named Tom Brady, and a total of 14 snaps with banged-up R...
Report: Jacoby Brissett Needs Surgery On His Thumb
New England Patriots quarterback Jacoby Brissett injured his thumb in Thursday’s game against the Houston Texans and will need surgery, according to Mike Petraglia of WEEI....
The Ongoing NFL Conspiracy You Don’t Know About<em></em>
Drew Magary’s Thursday Afternoon NFL Dick Joke Jamboroo runs every Thursday during the NFL season. Email Drew here. Buy his book here....
Stephen Jackson Righteously Owns Don King On CNN
Evil relic Don King introduced ham demon Donald Trump at a campaign event this morning, and in the process, said “nigger” when he meant to say “Negro.” As a rule, you shouldn’t listen to anything Don King has to say, but it’s always worth laughing at him. ...
Jose Bautista Admires Huge Dinger With A Backwards Home Run Trot
The AL wild card-leading Blue Jays got shut down by King Felix Hernandez this afternoon, managing just pair of hits over seven innings. Fear not. Jose Bautista has a flair for situations like these. With one out in the ninth inning, Bautista sent an Edwin Diaz fastball to the dang moon, then trotted...
E.J. Price Transfers From USC; Coach Clay Helton Denies Price Punched Him
USC has stumbled into their football season by getting ground into powder by Alabama, losing big at Stanford, then capping off their 1-2 start with a nice little quarterback controversy. People in and around L.A. are not happy. Tonight, the first domino fell....
USC Is Already A Mess
This past weekend, USC got stomped out by Stanford. That such a development is barely a blip on the radar is, as others have pointed out, alarming in an of itself from the USC perspective, and already first-year head coach Clay Helton appears to be cracking under the pressure....
It's Probably Time To Write Off The Bears
Maybe because in the Jay Cutler era the Bears have typically ranged from mediocre-bad to mediocre-good, spots on a relatively short continuum that usually requires the bulk of the season to pinpoint, this team gets treated as potentially relevant for far longer than it should. Let’s not fall for it ...
Jaguars Lineman Kelvin Beachum Carted Off After Sustaining Concussion
Jacksonville Jaguars offensive tackle Kelvin Beachum left today’s game on a cart after suffering a concussion....
It's Jacoby Brissett Time, I Guess
The New England Patriots had prepared to work around Tom Brady’s four-game suspension for the start of the season: Use Jimmy Garoppolo, err on the side of caution with anyone injured, and aim to scrape together a couple of wins. The team’s 2-0 after a 31-24 victory over the Miami Dolphins, but that ...
Lamar Jackson Remains Ridiculous
That Louisville quarterback Lamar Jackson is having an unreal season was already apparent—13 touchdowns and 1,015 total yards of offense in your first two games will make that clear, even if said games aren’t against particularly tough competition. That Lamar Jackson is potentially a demigod of some...
What The Heck Is Going On With Chris Ivory?
Jaguars running back Chris Ivory missed last week’s game against the Packers after being hospitalized early Sunday morning with what the team described as a “general medical issue.” Ivory was released from the hospital on Tuesday, and he will now miss this weekend’s game against the Chargers due to ...
USC Linebacker Charged With Rape, Forcible Sodomy
USC linebacker Osa Masina has been charged with two counts of forcible sodomy and one count of rape following an investigation by the Cottonwood Heights Police Department. Sgt. Dan Bartlett, who headed the investigation for the department, confirmed the news Thursday. Masina’s bail for the Utah case...
The Chokingest Team In Modern NFL History<em></em>
Drew Magary’s Thursday Afternoon NFL Dick Joke Jamboroo runs every Thursday during the NFL season. Email Drew here. Buy his book here....
After The NFL Comes Weed, Hollywood, And Fantasy Football
Against the Colts Peyton Manning ended up three yards short of Brett Favre’s record. They had the champagne ready. The cannons loaded. The midgets were hiding in the cakes. The hookers were naked in the limos. Everything was ready. All we need is a few more numbers! C’mon, Peyton! Keep coming! Certa...
The Most Interesting And Dominant Baseball Player In The World Plays In Japan
There is a 22-year-old professional baseball player who owns the following 2016 stats: 123 innings pitched, 2.12 ERA, 151 strikeouts. He has also put up these stats this season: 288 at-bats, .326/.425/.611, 22 home runs....
Ben Cherington Is Back In Baseball As Not-A-GM For The Blue Jays
When Ben Cherington was effectively forced out from the Red Sox organization last August, the team was on its way to a second-straight last place finish in the AL East—and just two years removed from a World Series win. ...
The Rams Might Be In A New City, But They Still Suck
The Los Angeles Rams started their season off with a robust fart noise Monday night, as the rebuilding San Francisco 49ers shut them out in Santa Clara, 28-0....