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Report: Jason Pierre-Paul Had His Right Index Finger Amputated
Schrödinger’s firework-mangled defensive lineman has come to an apparent resolution, at least as far as the immediate severity of the injuries. ESPN’s Adam Schefter has tweeted out what he says is a medical chart showing that Jason Pierre-Paul had his right index finger amputated today, after suffer...

What's Going On With Jason Pierre-Paul?
We still have absolutely no idea if Jason Pierre-Paul will be ready to start the season, or if he had his blown-up hand awkwardly replaced by a tiny doll hand. The Giants don’t seem to know either, oddly: after three unsuccessful days trying to visit their DE in a Miami hospital, they’ve returned to...

Cristiano Ronaldo Has A Great Time Getting Felt Up On Japanese TV
They say the way to a man’s heart is through his stomach. Apparently the aphorism applies a little differently to cyborgs. New evidence shows that a finger or five on Cristiano Ronaldo’s laser-cut abs turns him into a giggling schoolborg who will love you forever....

LeBron, Wade, And CP3 Are Riding Around The Bahamas On A Banana Boat
Here is a photo, taken from Dwyane Wade’s Instagram, of Wade, Carmelo Anthony, Chris Paul, and LeBron James drinking some fine wine together in the Bahamas. My two questions: would you wear a t-shirt with your own nickname on it, and is Carmelo a bit faded?...

So Why Did Jason Whitlock Bail On A <i>New York</i> Mag Profile?
New York magazine has a new 4,000-word feature on ESPN personality Jason Whitlock out, and while it offers a good (if familiar) rundown of Whitlock’s career and how he ended up getting fired from his own non-existent website before it even launched, it offers nothing first-hand from its subject. Wha...

U.S. Steeplechase Runner Evan Jager Eats It, Triumphs
On the Fourth of July in Paris, Evan Jager did something perfect. The 26-year-old American lined up for a 3,000-meter steeplechase against nearly all of the best steeplers in the world, and over the first five minutes of the race, he joined Kenyan stud Jairus Birech in running away from the entire f...

For 16 Minutes, Carli Lloyd Was The Greatest Player Of All Time
From the start, it felt like the fate of the United States women’s national team hinged not on talent or tactics or even luck, but on the answers to a series of open questions. Can Alex Morgan get healthy in time to contribute? What do we do with Christen Press and Sydney Leroux? What happens when w...

USWNT Shock Japan With Four Goals In Sixteen Minutes, Win World Cup
Soccer matches are 90 minutes long, and most of the time the ball is nowhere near a goal and 18 of the 22 players on the pitch are walking. But there are stretches—two minutes here, two seconds there—in which the players do unimaginable things with the ball and work with their teammates in a way tha...

Here Is Your 2015 Women's World Cup Final Liveblog
Here we go. The United States women’s national team is taking on Japan in the World Cup final. Follow along as we yell and jingoistically babble our way through the game while the Americans attempt to Do The Whole Shit for the first time since 1999....
![Jason Pierre-Paul Seriously Damaged Hand In Fireworks Accident [UPDATES]](https://images.deadspin.com/tr:w-900/1331767688127974183.jpg)
Jason Pierre-Paul Seriously Damaged Hand In Fireworks Accident [UPDATES]
Jason Pierre-Paul seriously injured his hand in a Saturday night fireworks accident, according to media reports. At least two people reported the Giants defensive end acquired an entire truck full of fireworks:...

LeBron James Is Still Trolling Dan Gilbert And It's Hilarious
So there’s one free agent we haven’t heard much from this offseason, and it’s none other than LeBron James! James opted out of his contract with the Cleveland Cavaliers, and is technically free to sign with any team in the league at this very second. ...

Chilean Satire Mag Makes A Funny About Messi Getting Finger Up His Butt
“Get ready, Messi,” Chilean magazine The Clinical writes, riffing on Chile defender Gonzalo Jara’s recent finger-in-the-butthole move, as well as Lionel Messi’s oft-mentioned otherworldly abilities ahead of Saturday’s Chile-Argentina Copa América final. Pretty clever, you guys!...

Korean Baseball Player Makes His Bat Flip Count
For Hwang Jae-gyun’s 21st home run, he held his bat out for a good four seconds before finally flipping it and trotting the bases. The Lotte Giants third baseman made sure the ball was fair so as to not squander such an excellent bat flip....

Chicharito Fractures Collarbone, Could Miss Gold Cup
Mexico will be without their starting striker for much of the Gold Cup. During last night’s friendly against Honduras in Houston, Chicharito left in the 40th minute after suffering an apparent fractured collarbone. Chicharito was fouled while tracking down a wayward pass, landed on his shoulder awkw...

I Think The 76ers Just Fleeced The Kings
The 76ers are approximately $40 million under next season’s salary cap, but they aren’t chasing LeBron James, LaMarcus Aldridge, or any other big name free agents. Instead, they’re making themselves available to teams looking to shed salary, trying to pick up future assets in return. ...

England Lose World Cup Semifinal In Most Heartbreaking Fashion Possible
For 90 minutes, England stood toe-to-toe with Japan. The match was tied 1-1, with each team having scored a penalty kick, and as the clock ticked into extra time, it looked like we would need 30 more minutes to decide the tie. And then, English defender Laura Bassett made a touch that will haunt her...

What Are The Knicks Doing?
I’m just going to list some things the Knicks are doing....

DeSean Jackson Says He Was Victim Of Eagles' "Smear Campaign"
Washington WR DeSean Jackson’s reality show premiered last night. I didn’t watch it because, god, who cares. But this guy at ESPN had to watch it for his job, and he wrote down the one interesting thing Jackson had to say, and here it is:...

Why Did You Swing At This Pitch, Pablo Sandoval?
Pablo Sandoval swung at an R.A. Dickey pitch above his eyes, and thought it would end well. He grounded out to short....
