jesus-christ-white-people Page 3 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
The World's Longest Basketball Shot...For Now
At least according to the YouTube Descriptions Book Of World Records. But still, that looks pretty far. Never change, bros with too much time on your hands....
Meet Your New Undersized, Scraptastic, Very White New England Sports Cult Hero: Danny Woodhead
Danny Woodhead, the Jets castoff and Rex Ryan-anointed "little fucker," made his Patriots debut yesterday and is already being touted as the economy-sized Wes Welker. Chief among these proponents is Dan Shaughnessy. Of course. Let's look at the best of the worst....
Look At The Fucking End Of This Trend: Sayonara, Hoopsters
The Hoopsters brought us a lot of enjoyment over the last two months. However, now that summer's over and the New York Times is writing about them—and quoting me—it's time to say goodbye....
Tuneful, Preppy Version Of "Bitches Ain't Shit" Suggests Bitches May Be Shit, After All
Oh, there's nothing quite like a post-ironic a cappella version of a white man's very ironic cover of a Dr. Dre song done by a group of spunky young tarts....
Look At This Fucking Hoopster: "Kelly Tripucka" Hangs Out With San Antonio Spurs, Is Lead Singer Of Arcade Fire
An occasional feature in which we spotlight the ridiculous trend of recontextualized basketball jerseys. Today: everyone's favorite Polish-American Knicks color commentator Kelly Tripucka....
Look At This Fucking Hoopster: "Shaquille O'Neal" Makes Out With Some Guy At A Party
An occasional feature in which we spotlight the ridiculous trend of recontextualized basketball jerseys. Today: The Diesel, Shaquille O'Neal....
Blackhawks Fans Swing Dancing To That One Annoying Song, Because Why Not
A bunch of Blackhawks fans finally decided to combine their team's insufferable goal-scored anthem with the Lindy Hop because when anyone thinks "middling Scottish rock song," they think "dance celebrating Charles Linbergh." [Puck Daddy]...
For Your Viewing Pleasure: The Worst Mizzou Volleyball Team Rap Ever
The Missouri women's volleyball team's official "Spirit Group," VolleyZou, found an enterprising group of young men with Missouri apparel, a gold cart, a video camera, and lots of gumption and commissioned them to make this, whatever this is....
Look At This Fucking Hoopster: "Toni Kukoc" Drums For Vampire Weekend
An occasional feature in which we spotlight the ridiculous trend of recontextualized basketball jerseys. Today: The Croatian Sensation, Toni Kukoc....
Look At This Fucking Hoopster: "Jason Kidd" Doublefists Dos Equis Cans At A Concert
An occasional feature in which we spotlight the ridiculous trend of recontextualized basketball jerseys. Today: Jason Kidd....
Look At This Fucking Hoopster: "Earl Watson" Shopping For Organic Produce
An occasional feature in which we spotlight the ridiculous trend of recontextualized basketball jerseys. Today: Earl Watson. Earl. Watson....
Look At This Fucking Hoopster: "Isaiah Rider" And "Tyson Chandler" Hang At Rock The Bells
An occasional feature in which we spotlight the ridiculous trend of recontextualized basketball jerseys. Today: Isaiah "Don't Call Me J.R." Rider and Tyson Chandler....
Look At This Fucking Hoopster: "Michael Jordan," Playing Dodgeball In Williamsburg
An occasional feature in which we spotlight the ridiculous trend of recontextualized basketball jerseys. Today: Hipster Jordan. Player: Michael Jordan Team: 1992 U.S. men's national basketball team Ubiquity: Fairly high Scene: Williamsburg Cut Copy show/"Pool Party" Unnecessarily Decimaled Score Ou...
White Duke Player Completes Rare Feat Of Athleticism
Miles and Mason Plumlee, of the Arden Plumlees, took a moment during the Duke basketball game for some fun. Watch as Miles jumps over Mason to throw down a dunk and delight the other tank-top wearing white people in attendance. [The Dagger]...
Being Dave Matthews: A Brief History
1985: "Robert Randolph" on the birth certificate, but he'll go by "Randy." That's the original plan. Named after his grandfathers. Then Dad starts having doubts. He's a Robert too—doesn't want his son to be Little Bob or Bobby like he had been. So one day, it just hits my parents. "David Andrew." Da...
Look At These Fucking Hoopsters: Grab Bag
Welcome back to Look At This Fucking Hoopster. I think this latest batch should slake your thirst for the indie bros you love to mock so much. Part One | Part Two | Part Three...
320-Lb. White Men Can't Jump
Ravens OT Joe Reitz did the honors last night for a TD celebration goalpost dunk. Or, he tried. Which is sad considering he's played more years of high level basketball than football in his life....
Look At These Fucking Hoopsters At Lollapalooza: Part Two
Welcome to the second edition of the Hoopsters of Lollapalooza 2010. There's been some debate over whether of not some of the entrants are real "hipsters" or merely "bros." Why though? This is a forum for ridicule, not ontological precision. Onto the pictures! Part One | Part Two | Part Three...
Look At These Fucking Hoopsters At Lollapalooza
This weekend's Lollapalooza was dubbed "Hoopster Mecca" by one tipster, and after sifting through all the submissions it's clear that the hoopsters made Lollapalooza the site of their Hajj. So, here's part one of a multipart series. Christ, just look at these fucking hoopsters. Part One | Part Two ...
Cal Second-String Wide Receiver Is Third-Rate Rapper
For senior Alex "Loggy" Lagemann, the upcoming football season couldn't have come at a worse time: the addition of practices, study halls, and games to his schedule will only take valuable time away from his true passion: making awful, awful rap music....