jezebel Page 2 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

The Greatest Racehorse You're Not Celebrating
Win or lose, Zenyatta will retire after Saturday's Breeders' Cup Classic. Win, and she finishes her career without having ever lost. And she'll be even money by post time. Is there some horse sexism at work here?...

Crazy Lady Elisabeth Hasselbeck Has Predictably Crazy Theory About Our Brett Favre Story
Barry mentioned this earlier, but here's video of Elisabeth Hasselbeck putting on her tin-foil hat and saying it's fishy that the Brett Favre story broke the week Favre was playing the Jets. It's the dumbest conspiracy theory Favre's junk has caused....

Who Wants To See A Photo Of Amar'e Stoudemire Jumping Naked Into A Pool?
It was you guys, right? That ESPN The Mag Body Issue, is really, uh, shaping up to be, uh, something. [via the seemingly appropriately named All Ball]...

She Got Gam: FIBA Considers Lower Rims, Higher Hems For Women's Basketball
FIBA is considering some changes to international women's basketball, including lowering the rim to bring dunking to the game—finally—as well as new, monocle-fogging uniforms that'll make the sport "more attractive for spectators and media." We've come a long way, baby....

Sexual Assault Allegations Against Two Michigan State Players: Why Aren't Charges Being Brought?
Two MSU players were accused of sexually assaulting a woman on campus in August. Despite a police recommendation to prosecute, and one of the accused players later corroborating the victim's account, the prosecutor's office will not be pursuing the case....

Notes On "Campdick": A Former NFLer On Ines Sainz And Locker-Room Sexual Tension
A babe reporter walks into a locker room. Catcalls ensue; jock straps fly; penises shrivel. She doesn't understand the words, but she understands the sexual tension. It's palpable when an attractive woman appears. Palpable. Players call it campdick....

<em>Jersey Shore</em>'s Snooki Singing A Mets Fight Song, Because Why Not
Via a two-and-a-half-year-old Hot Clicks post comes this video of MTV "personality" Nicole "Snooki" Polizzi singing the Lucas Prata "hit" "And We Say...Let's Go Mets" which I had never heard of before. Maybe because it's factually untrue....

Letter From A Young Female Sportswriter: Ines Sainz, You Make Me Want To Stop Trying
If rationality and feminism and mediocre Spanish skills didn't stop me, I would write to Ines Sainz and ask her to tell me why she does what she does for a living....

Day One At Dink Inc.: A Woman Begins Her Odyssey Through Sports Gambling's Underworld
Beth Raymer moved to Vegas in 2001, hoping to land a cocktail-waitressing job. Instead, she wound up the girl Friday to a gambler named Dink, from whom she learned that one "takes" the dog, "lays" the favorite, and never, ever steals....

Let's Talk About Sex, Ines Sainz, And The Sideline
The Jets harassed a female reporter during practice. According to another female reporter who was there, it was the natural outcome of an eye candy "journalist," and a bunch of overgrown young men, filled with testosterone and not much sense....

That Time Of The Month: Patronizingly Edited WNBA Playoffs Highlights
The NBA's ladies auxiliary is in its playoffs, and yesterday the team from Atlanta clinched a berth in the finals by beating the one from New York. So here are some condescendingly packaged highlights of the little ladies scampering around the hardwood....

A Sex Addict Relapses: An Ex-Girlfriend, A Panty Flash, And Mark Cuban
Well, let's get it out the way — it didn't take me very long to relapse after leaving sex rehab....

Miami University Cracking Down On Poopy, Pukey Sorority Parties
Miami University fraternities and sororities will be forced to hire security and designate "sober monitors" at Greek events this year. Why, oh, why would such drastic measures be needed you ask?...

"When Their Panties're Moist, We'll Give 'Em The Finale": One Stud's Adventures In Deca And Male Stripping
Paul Solotaroff, the guy with the pecs in the above photo, lived through the age of muscle, which on one notable occasion found our hero shimmying for horny Long Island women, his dick in a Star of David rayon sling....

Mystery Solved? Arkansas Reporter Was Supposedly Fired For Using Twitter, Not For Her Florida Hat
Every morning, the fine folks at Sports Radio Interviews sift through the a.m. drive-time chatter to bring you the best interviews with coaches, players, and personalities across the sports landscape. Today: an unemployed radio reporter and her ex-boss....

Women's Basketball Is First Among Unequals
It's a college hoops tradition: you play the women's game in the late afternoon, then the fans show up and you play the men's game. Is this a civil rights violation?...

Foul Ball Couple Update: Bo "The Bailer" Threatens To Leak Intimate Photos Of Ex He Failed To Protect
All is not well with our favorite foul ball dodging star-cross'd lovers, Bo and Sara. We've got allegations of infidelity, and the threat of dropping nude photos. Join us, on As The Bo Turns....

The Song That Was Playing The First Time I Had Sex Was...
Mine was Meatloaf's "Two Out Of Three Ain't Bad." Mark from Atlanta's was "Little Red Corvette." Others are below. Add more in the comments, please, horndogs....

Rob Dibble Will Not Tolerate Mouthy Broads At A Baseball Game
Washington Nationals announcer Rob Dibble used his power of the pen the other night to circle two dumb broads who dared converse at a baseball game. It must have been contagious, because he couldn't shut up either....

Hero Monkey Saves Puppy From Fire In China (UPDATE: Hoax?)
A pipeline explosion in Nanjing has claimed the lives of 13 and injured hundreds. But the bright news comes in the form of this monkey who was photographed running away from the flames carrying this puppy to relative safety. [Now Public]...