This bomb from Shams Charania was basically just a matter of turning subtext into text:
I suppose we should file this under Doing What You’ve Gotta Do:
Joakim Noah’s tenure on the Knicks has resembled an expensive rehabilitation project for a large, ungainly, nearly extinct bird. (Except the bird also does drugs he’s not supposed to, and is somewhat refreshing in his openness about the whole thing.)
Here’s something different: A professional athlete refusing to participate in the usual post-PED bust ritual self-mortification that only serves to prevent us from grappling with any meaningful questions about drugs and sports.
Joakim Noah will be suspended 20 games for violating the NBA’s anti-drug policy—reportedly for unknowingly taking an over-the-counter supplement, which is currently banned by the league but would no longer be punished under the next season’s new collective bargaining agreement.
It is a truth universally acknowledged that Joakim Noah’s shooting motion can be awkward as hell, but most basketball players do not acknowledge this truth by mocking it to Noah’s face in the middle of a game. DeMarcus Cousins is not most basketball players:
The Knicks traveled to play fellow mediocre-ish Eastern Conference squad Detroit this evening, and Joakim Noah did this. Turns out, a shitty Vine of someone’s TV is the perfect way to show you this “highlight.”
The Knicks always start their training camp with a weeklong session at the U.S. Military Academy, and each year they close with a team dinner with cadets, including a speech by a current or former officer. This year, new Knicks center was the only player not to attend the dinner, and he had his reasons.
The breakup of the contender-era Chicago Bulls core is well and truly underway, as Tim Bontemps of the Washington Post reports that Joakim Noah is planning on heading eastward to join former teammate Derrick Rose in New York and sign for the Knicks. Here’s the Post:
Everytown for Gun Safety, an advocacy group that seeks to end gun violence in America through stricter gun control laws, has cut a series of ads with NBA stars Chris Paul, Steph Curry, Carmelo Anthony, and Joakim Noah.
Joakim Noah left the Bulls’ 105-102 loss to the Nets late in the third quarter, after an attempted steal resulted in his shoulder being yanked awkwardly.
During a break in last night’s playoff game between the Cavs and Bulls, Ohio State quarterback Cardale Jones and other players from the national champion Buckeyes were introduced and cheered on the court. Of course, this harmless event led to Jones getting into a beef with Bulls center Joakim Noah, because if there’s…
One of the most endearing things about Joakim Noah is his continued insistence on just not having it with LeBron James and whatever team James happens to be on. There was the time he called out James for his dancing in the middle of a game, the time he called the Heat “Hollywood as hell,” and there he was during…
You might be tempted to call E'Twaun Moore's game-winning three the highlight of last night's contest between the Thunder and Bulls, but I submit that the night's truly transcendent moment occurred on the ensuing possession, when a portly Bulls fan lost all notion of etiquette and got himself a big ol' handful of…
Kevin Garnett's picked up a lot from other players during his lengthy NBA career, and now it seems he's learning new skills from athletes outside of basketball—specifically soccer's Luis Suárez.
The Chicago Bulls played without Derrick Rose and Pau Gasol last night, and got rolled by Boogie Cousins and the Kings as a result. They kept it close through the first half, but the game started to slip away from them in the third quarter, at which point Joakim Noah decided that he'd just had it with STUPID…
No one in Chicago is talking about the third quarter of last night's Bulls game, when the team held the Toronto Raptors to 14 points right in front of Drake and God. Everyone is, rather, talking about the fourth quarter, when Derrick Rose left what was on the verge of becoming a nearly close game after collapsing…
Joakim Noah heaves up a fistful of ugly in Chicago's 85-84 win over Atlanta. Bulls guard Jimmy Butler led Chicago back from a 21-point deficit with 29 points and a game-winning three, in a more or less convincing MJ impersonation. Jo's wasn't as pretty. AP / Jeff Haynes
[Bulls center Joakim Noah and Wizards center Marcin Gortat battle for control of the ball during the second half of Game 4 in Washington, Sunday. The Wizards defeated the Bulls 98-89. AP Photo/Alex Brandon.]