joe Page 151 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Joe Morgan: "Why Can't White People Catch A Break?"
Joe on the inauguration: "It wasn't just the black people who made sacrifices. There were a lot of white people who died to help the cause. We seem to forget them." [Milwaukee Journal Sentinel]...
Torre's New Tell-All Book Sounds Delightful
The New York Post managed to obtain an early copy of Joe Torre's soon to be released tell-all. The book, co-written by Tom Verducci, includes some fantastic characterizations of A-Rod....
Joe Thornton Does His Best "Italian Soccer Teammate" Impression
The West Captain on All-Star teammate Roberto Luongo: "[He's] a nice, dark, good-looking Italian guy." I choose to take this as conclusive evidence of his homosexuality....
One Man's Quest To Rid The NFL Of Joe Buck And His Humorless, Emotionless Act
Many sports fans criticize Fox's Joe Buck for his sometimes wooden broadcasts of NFL and MLB games. One writer suggests it's time for Fox to look elsewhere for big games....
Unfortunately, Tim McCarver Will Not Go To Prison Because Of This
Weird little story about a moonlighting Fox Sports "stat guy" who illegally used USMS transportation to shuttle around Buck, McCarver and Aikman. [Smoking Gun]...
Pay No Attention To The Berman In The Background
Two top seeds slept for an extra week in their comfy, comfy beds and then promptly got bounced from their Super Bowl dream machine yesterday. How do you feel today Steelers and Giants fans?...
Who Dares To Tamper In Joe Flacco's Unibrow Domain?
The Baltimore Ravens' Joe Flacco-led run through the AFC playoffs is just one more example of a famous unibrow influencing world events. [East Coast Bias]...
Who is The Fiend Who Stole JoePa's Glasses?
APB, State College, Pa., Police Department: All units be on the lookout for anyone wearing pair of thick, bronze glasses. Suspect may also be wearing a USC sweatshirt....
Joel Przybilla's Extended Family Is Not Cool With David Stern's Stupid Fines
Portland Trailblazer Joel Przybilla was fined $7,500 for this altercation with Tyson Chandler last week. For comment on this momentous national story, the media naturally turned to the 83-year-old grandmother of Przybilla's wife....
49ers Bid A High-Pitched, Frenetic Adieu To Joe Starkey
Joe Starkey is retiring as play-by-play voice of the 49ers. Don't recognize the name? He's the broadcaster who always sounds like his testicles are wired to a car battery, as this legendary clip demonstrates....
Also, Both Are Mostly Seen in Parades Now and Seem Far Less Animated
Got an image you'd like to see in here first thing in the morning? Send it to [email protected]. Subject: Morning crap...
Investment Firm For Sale: Cheap.
HRJ Capital, an investment firm started by former 49ers Joe Montana, Ronnie Lott and Harris Barton (Montana left in 2006), may be taken over by Silicon Valley Bank, to which it owes $69 million. [San Francisco Chronicle]...
Joe Horn Only Pawn In Game Of Life
As reported yesterday, the Giants brought Joe Horn in for a workout, acting as if they might actually sign the 36-year-old receiver for the stretch run, but Joe Horn says ... he was used....
Joe Montana's Offspring Will Pummel You, Take Your Lunch Money
Just because Oaks Christian High in Los Angeles never played a decently talented opponent this season is no reason to think that Nick Montana doesn't have a future as a quarterback. Or maybe it is....
Giants Honk The Horn?
The silver lining in the Plaxico Burress saga? Joe Horn is (maybe) back, baby! [NJ Star-Ledger]...
Joe Paterno Continues To Age In Reverse
JoePa gets three-year contract extension from Penn State. Grim Reaper throws down scythe in disgust; Nittany Lion pours himself another cocktail. [NBCSports]...
Famous Oaks Christian Progeny Go For Title Tomorrow
Big game on Friday night in Westlake Village near Los Angeles, as Oaks Christian High (13-0) takes on visiting Gardena Serra (13-0) in the Northwest Division championship game....
The Man Who Would Kill The BCS
Meet U.S. Representative Joe Barton; global warming skeptic, enthusiastic Civilization IV player, ranking Republican on the Energy and Commerce Committee — BCS hater....
Joe Sakic Out Three Months
And I guess those are Joe Sakic's fingers in the snow blower? [Sports Crackle Pop]...
Prep Football Star Shoots Himself During Traffic Stop
Billey Joe Johnson, a 17-year-old high school running back from Mississippi, died of a self-inflicted gun shot wound during a routine traffic stop yesterday. The junior tailback from George County High School was one of the top-rated prospects in the country and reportedly had scholarship offers fro...