john Page 167 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Peyton Manning Does His Part To Make Sure Papa John's Will Continue Haunting Your Sundays
Good news, everyone! America's favorite lipless pizza huckster is teaming up with America's favorite robustly foreheaded quarterback in order to bring as many annoying pizza commercials to your television as possible....
If You Didn't Like Joe Posnanski's Joe Paterno Biography, Never Forget That It Could Have Been Written By John Feinstein
You will recall that three years ago Joe Paterno was college football's unicorn, and you will recall that two months ago, the late Joe Paterno—and his role in the Jerry Sandusky child abuse scandal that engulfed Penn State—starred in Joe Posnanski's lamentable Paterno. We all have decided to do the ...
The Dodgers Might Open The 2014 Season In Australia
Australia, while not on the level of Japan, does love it some baseball. The history of the sport there dates back to the 1850s, and the domestic Australian Baseball League is profitable for the first time ever—thanks in part to funding from MLB. The ABL is increasingly becoming a legitimate winter l...
Stevie Johnson Learned The Hard Way That Celebrating A Touchdown With Fans Can Be Dangerous
Stevie Johnson—whose post-touchdown exploits we've featured before—found the end zone yesterday for the first time since Week 3, and gave Buffalo the lead in a wacky game very few people saw live. Unfortunately for Bills fans, they blew the lead in the fourth quarter and lost 35-34 to Tennessee, dr...
The Red Sox Pull Off Trade For John Farrell, Will Get "Marginal" Piece Not Named John Farrell In Return
John Farrell will be managing the Boston Red Sox next year and Mike Aviles (reportedly) will be an infielder for the Toronto Blue Jays. The decision to trade an actual professional athlete for a guy whose primary responsibility is to put professional athletes in a certain order for hitting purposes...
Texas A&M's Six Laterals With No Time Left Couldn't Beat LSU
Not often that an SEC tilt will give you flashbacks to a Div. III game from five years ago. But today the No. 20 Aggies started slinging laterals every which way but forward while down five and out of time against No. 6 LSU, almost raising the ghosts of Trinity vs. Millsaps....
The Red Sox Are Preparing To Trade An Actual Player For A Manager
ESPN Boston reported today that the Red Sox are in serious negotiations to acquire former pitching coach John Farrell from the Blue Jays. Farrell is the Blue Jays' manager, and the Red Sox, well, they're looking for one....
<em>The Sessions</em> And The Trap Of The Disease-Of-The-Week Movie
All genres have their trademarks. In romantic comedies, the two meet, fall in love, break up, and then wind up together. In action movies, a lot of ass is kicked, then more ass is kicked, and then at the end, a hell of a lot of ass is kicked. That predictability isn't always a bad thing—after all, w...
The Knicks' Tip-Off Event Was A Parade Of Sadness
The Knicks don't look like they'll be a legitimate contender for the Larry O'Brien Trophy this season. They're old as dirt and just generally depressing. Right now, the most entertaining aspect of the team is anything Rasheed Wallace does. Don't look at the roster. Aw, you looked at it, didn't you?...
Some Of Kevin Kolb's Ribs Are No Longer Attached To His Sternum
Well, this puts Kolb squarely atop the Most Horrifying NFL Injury Of The Season leader board, doesn't it? Having your ribs detached from your sternum sounds like one of the most awful things that could ever happen, and I'm not confident that doctors even know how to reattach a man's ribs to his ste...
Rudi Johnson's Auctioning Off A Bunch Of His Shit And It's All Really Cheap
Former NFL running back Rudi Johnson, who was once on an episode of MTV Cribs (playing third-string behind Bow Wow and Don Omar), is auctioning off many of his possessions, and he's passing the savings on to youuuu!...
Ivan Johnson Doesn't Care About Your Backboards
The Atlanta Hawks held practice today at Butler University, and forward/scariest NBA player candidate Ivan Johnson ruined it for everyone by cracking the backboard. Practice ended after that. Nice job, Ivan....
U.S.A. Escapes From Antigua With A Win Thanks To Eddie Johnson's Last-Second Goal
Eddie Johnson scored both goals for the U.S. men's national team and helped lift his side to an enormous 2-1 upset over the heavily favored Antigua & Barbuda team tonight in North Sound....
Calvin Johnson Says He Suffered A Concussion. The Lions Say He Didn't.
Lots of football players get concussions. That's how it works. It's a violent sport, and they play it for so long, that most every football player you encounter, even long-retired dads, will say, oh, yeah, I had a concussion or two. So football players not only get concussions, but they know concuss...
Woody Johnson Got Flustered When A CNBC Anchor Asked Him If Tim Tebow Was Still A Virgin
The Jets held their own against the best team in football on Monday night while Mitt Romney surged in the polls, so New York owner Woody Johnson must have assumed he was on sure footing when he headed into CNBC's coked-up Squawk Box earlier today. After the usual Mark Sanchez chat, Johnson faced a...
Roger Goodell Reinstates Saints Bounty Program Suspensions, Writes Prickish Letters To Those Involved
Roger Goodell, having tripped all over his dick as regards the Saints' bounty program, is back to swinging the stupid thing in our faces again. Today, he reinstated the suspensions of all four players, although three of them were given more lenient punishment this time around. Scott Fujita's suspen...
Ben Affleck's Only Weakness As A Director: Casting Ben Affleck. <em>Argo</em>, Reviewed.
1. Argo is such a terrific, jaw-dropping true-life tale, with such a natural, seamless movie storyline, that anyone who knows the story would beg the filmmakers not to screw it up. So it's a relief that they absolutely do not do that. There are so many tones to juggle here; this is a film that veers...
Here's The Wizznutzz Turning John Hollinger Into A Zagat's Of Existential Basketball Despair
Last week, ESPN's John Hollinger broke down the strengths and weaknesses of the Washington Wizards roster (Insider). Fans could find some bright spots if they looked: John Wall has "blinding open-court speed"; Nene is a "strong, quick big man who can run floor." But Wizards fans know better than to...
The Jets Are In Line For An Attendance Debacle Tonight
It's been reported that as of Friday, the Jets had 12,000 tickets remaining unsold for tonight's game against the Texans. It's understandable. MetLife Stadium is a remarkably joyless place to watch your team lose 59-6. But there have been no whispers of a blackout, so we can assume Woody Johnson has...
Auburn Wrests Title Of "Team Everyone Wants To Play" From Arkansas
Arkansas beat Auburn today, which in itself wouldn't be so strange except that as recently as this morning it was reasonable to ask whether Arkansas would ever win another game, ever, ever. The Hogs were a preseason top-10 team that lost f̶i̶v̶e̶ four games—in September. If someone was to cushion th...