john Page 211 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Hugh Johnson Heads to Tuscaloosa
Listen young lady, I don't know how they do things down in Lexington, but we at the Hugh Johnson Project don't really "do" dick jokes. What's that you say? It is just one big dick joke? Well alright then, please gather up some like-minded friends and join us after the jump....
Spartan Football Gets Hugh Excited
Michigan State is looking to move to 2-0 in the Big Ten, and they're looking good while doing it. The Spartans are holding off the Iowa Hawkeyes by a score of 16-13 in the fourth quarter. BC and NC State have slowed down a bit, and the Eagles lead 28-17 on the strength of Chris Crane's 319 yards th...
Uncorking The Hugh Johnson Project
Another weekend of college football has begun, but for once we'll have to make due without the play-by-play brilliance of Pam Ward. Everyone's favorite Hugh Johnson punching bag is off covering the WNBA Finals so this week you'll have to settle for her substitute saying the most ridiculous things i...
John McCain Seeks Debate "Help" From Fellow Rageaholic
If John McCain seemed a little feisty during his presidential debate with Barack Obama last week, there's a good reason for it. His campaign claims that he began taking an herbal supplement designed to "enhance memory and keep energy levels up" in preparation for the showdown. Makes sense—until you ...
Terrell Owens Loves His Quarterback, Not "Sheshawn" Johnson
T.O. would like to take this opportunity to clarify a few things. Yes, it sounded like he was complaining when he said that 18 throws and 2 running plays called in his honor was not enough involvement in the Dallas Cowboys game plan, but he seriously holds no ill will towards his coach, owner, offen...
Hugh 3: Updating The Late Games
No. 9 Wisconsin 19, Michigan 0. Great play in the first half from Wisconsin on fourth-and-short where the punter ran up under center and used a hard count to draw Michigan offside to keep the Badgers' drive alive. Bret Bielema might be the most creative coach in America. And Michigan still sucks. Co...
Olympic Gold Medalist Challenges Chad Ochocinco to Race
Dominating one sport isn't enough anymore for today's athletes. Apparently, if you're a professional football player, specifically an egomaniacal receiver, you think your skills translate to other venues. Chad Johnson wanted to race against Michael Phelps in the pool — not to mention a horse on a tr...
Hugh 2: UNC Steals TD Pass, Game From Miami
UNC defensive back Tremaine Goddard ripped Miami's game-winning touchdown out of the hands of Kayne Farquharson in the end zone. Farquharson had the ball (and the game) on his hands, only to have it pilfered by Goddard to save the game for the Tar Heels, 28-24. Almost as unreal as the video of a Hur...
Elway Engaged To Former Raiderette
Former Denver Broncos superstar John Elway is engaged—to a former Raiders cheerleader. Traitor bastard! Paige Green, a 41-year-old that Elway met at a golf tournament three years ago, moved to Denver a year after she met the NFL Hall-Of-Famer. John presumably celebrated the engagement in typical Elw...
John Clayton's A Little Gassy In The Morning
And now for a little stomach-churning media goodness. One of the inevitable downsides of ESPN's new "Live" SportsCenter are some of the slip-ups that occur during live broadcasts which unfortunately make it to air. Case in point — this morning, at approximately 10:28, it appears NFL beat reporter J...
Tim Tebow Welcomes Hugh to the Last Hugh of the Day
This version of the Hugh Johnson Project is brought to you by Washington St. coach Paul Wulff and his strict nutrition standards (via: SbB): ...
Hugh Won't Believe What NC State Did
NC State stunned #15 Eastern Carolina today. After State got the game into overtime, Andre Brown caught a ball, ran ten yards and asked his teammates to follow him ... to FREEDOM! They obliged. Other winners today so far include Clemson (which blanked South Carolina State), Boston College, Northwes...
Hugh Are the Best, and Joe Biden's Not Afraid of Ohio State
Barack Obama's right hand man isn't exactly a fan of Ohio State's football team: ...
Hugh There With the Sideburns; Yeah, HUGH!
All of the games so far today are still in their infancy (though the suspense has completely been extinguished in the contests involving Penn St., Alabama and Georgia Tech), which means we shall turn to our good friend "the dick joke" to get us through the early afternoon. But before we do that, wo...
Auburn Dean Concerned His Students Might Do Something Embarrassing On National Television
Here's a letter from Auburn's dean of students Dr. Johnny Green that was sent out to the student population (then to us), prepping them for the big game against LSU this weekend. This seems like it could possibly backfire. No booing! ...
Clinton Portis and Brian Mitchell Radio Interview Goes Entertainingly Off The Rails
Yesterday, Clinton Portis went on John Thompson's radio show on WTEM 980 in Washington, D.C. and within minutes he and Thompson's co-host, former Redskin/Eagle Brian Mitchell , were at each others throats. B. Mitch has been critical of Portis in the past, which prompted the feud, and the DC Sports ...
Curt Schilling Puts the Moves on Cindy McCain?
Everyone knows that Curt Schilling loves John McCain. But can the Republican presidential nominee trust the Red Sox pitcher when it comes to something much more important than an election...his wife? At a recent charity event, Curt Schilling confused Cindy McCain with his wife and held hands with h...
Hugh Johnson IV: Hugh Can't Mess With the Bulldogs
South Carolina put up a tremendous fight and gave us the exciting college football we all hope for early in September. No. 2 ranked Georgia had the ball bounce their way throughout the day, literally in the end zone at one point, but SC never quit. A nice two minute drill put together by Chris Smell...
Hugh Johnson III: It's a Penis Joke, See
In order for Penn State fans to really view their dominance today of Syracuse as a moral victory, the "Nittaly Lions'" point differential must be greater than the number of years JoePa has been head ball coach in Happy Valley. In legit football action, South Carolina is giving Georgia a real fight. ...
Why Are There So Many Posts About Hugh?
Maryland is running all over the 23rd ranked Cal Bears. So far we've learned that Jim Henson is a former Terp and that Cal isn't very good. Be sure to send your brilliant observations to "The Hugh Johnson" via AIM. So a cal wide receiver just got knocked out basically and threw up his green Gatorade...