joke Page 5 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
The Asian American Journalists Association Wants Jason Whitlock To Apologize
Calling Jason Whitlock's controversial tweet "inappropriate on so many levels," the Asian American Journalists Association has called for the Fox Sports columnist to issue an apology....
<em>South Park</em> Is Already Doing Penn State Jokes
Too soon? [WWTDD]...
Devin Hester Was "Basically Attacked" With A Sucker Slap At A Casino Last Week
You know who would probably be a bad person to slap in the back of the head in public? An NFL player. Specifically, an NFL player who is considered one of the fastest men in the sport and who can probably chase you down even if you're speeding away in a Rascal....
Kawhi Leonard Is 11½ Inches
News 4 San Antonio is really, really excited about the size of Kawhi Leonard's hands. So much so that they put together this graphic comparing him to the newsroom, without bothering to specify what they're talking about....
99¢ Store Now 75¢ Store In Honor Of LeBron, Because, You Know. That Pesky Fourth Quarter.
Getting old? Getting old. But not just yet! (Let us have the rest of the week, tops.) A Houston-area bargain store is creatively slashing prices, so you can thank LeBron James for savings on off-brand candy and possibly used dinnerware....
This Video Suggests That David Kahn Was Just Trying To Make A Funny
Yes, last night David Kahn broke the funny rule that jokes that are even vaguely about kids with terrible diseases and/or widows are never really funny, but the actual tone of the remarks he made last night — which have since given rise to conspiracy theories, a load of criticism, a Twitter trend,...
Retiring Beer League Softball Commish Would Like To Thank Himself For All His Hard Work And Dedication
Lucky for us and our readers, half of all intramural sports participants join up just to get in touch with their inner asshole. I suspect that most of these individuals are tolerable for most of the day, but once they throw on a T-shirt with a number on the back something changes inside them. Like t...
Jameer Nelson Did Not Use His Free Nosebleed Seats For The Hawks-Bulls Game Last Night
Back in April, the Chicago Bulls held off the Magic 102-99 after a Jameer Nelson three-pointer came too late. Nelson congratulated Bulls guard Derrick Rose with a promise to "catch you in the second round" of the playoffs (video of the exchange is above; the mixing is not our doing) during Rose's ...
Stop Your Judgmental Infield Chatter While I Handle The Pill, Softball Pitcher Pleads
Here's another overwrought email sent to a company softball team wherein one rookie pitcher had himself a tough outing. For some reason this young fireballer also ended up in a dugout scrap with one of his teammates who started heckling about his performance. Then, of course, he felt compelled to wr...
Surly Flag Football Coach Needs Team To Learn How To "Grab A Fucking Flag And Pull It Off." STAT
I can't get enough of the unhinged fuckery that exists in adult recreational sports. Like this flag football coach, who has had it with his team's uninspired performances right before the playoffs. That can't happen if you play for this coach (of flag football) if you want to be champions (of flag ...
Soccer Rec League Captain Works Harder Than You And Has The Sweaty Email To Prove It
I've noticed most of these rec league emailers possess a trait and that, due to some tic beyond their control, they need to verbalize their small victories in order to make sure people are paying attention. Because at their stations in life, the only worthwhile accolade can come from a teammate sma...
Another Bitchy Email Over Rec League Kickball Surfaces
This time a lady kickballstress from a Florida league is the one who unloads on her lazy teammates. She doesn't need stats to call out the bumbling stooges on her squad because she can see who's playing "vigilant" defense out there with her own eyes and she'll let them hear it if they're not playing...
Kickball Rec League Captain Sends Out Fantastically Bitchy Email To His Underperforming Team
An Atlanta-area kickball team recently suffered a demoralizing 20-0 loss. Yes, we're familiar with how serious some people are about their kickball and it's never fun to get blown out. However, if you have to play with this fun lovin' bunch of sad-sacks it's still inexcusable to go all Earl Weaver ...
Watch A Frat-Boy Flyers Fan Flip The Fuck Out On His Bros
Brah here goes to Penn State. When he went out to study for a "very important test," Brah's bros covered his bed with, per the summary of whomever posted this video, "hundreds of plastic solo cups." Dude....
Guy Who Looked Like Tim Lincecum Doesn't Look Like Tim Lincecum Anymore
Wiley Wiggins—the actor who played Tim Lincecum doppelganger Mitch Kramer in Richard Linklater's classic Dazed and Confused—did an interview with the Wall Street Journal following Tim Lincecum's historic playoff debut. Turns out he doesn't look like Tim Lincecum anymore....
Spurs Spank Young Boys 4-0
(Although one of The Spoiler's favourite was a piece of subtle brilliance from Sky Sports' Bill Leslie: "Young Boys struggle to keep clean sheets.")...
Gene Simmons Kept His Love Gun In Holster With ESPN Makeup Gal, Suit Claims
Yes, they call him Dr. Love, but he didn't want to meet this ESPN makeup artist, Victoria Jackson, in the Ladies Room. It's Hotter Than Hell, in there. The Firehouse, though? That's fine....
Internet Commenters, Ethnographized
New York Magazine's Doree Shafrir delved into the culture of internet commenting, specifically examining several popular websites. Strangely enough, she lumped you all in with the Gawker commenters. Show her how it's done down there in the mire. [NYMag.com]...
<em>The New Yorker</em> Makes Highbrow Blogger-In-Basement Joke You'll Set Aside But Never Get Around To Reading (UPDATE)
Ben McGrath takes up the slumming-dandy-goes-to-a-ballgame mantle from Roger Angell (who should be filing his account of the 2003 World Series any day now) and manages not only to name-check this humble site but let drop the bonnest of mots:...
Let's Get All The Tiger Woods' "Masters Threesome" Jokes Out of the Way Now
USA Today's unavoidable weekend poll question: Who is best suited to play in Tiger's threesome at the Masters? "For pure theater, why not make Y.E. Yang part of the threesome?" Why not, indeed! [Thanks to Chris S.]...