jones Page 79 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
This Must Have Looked Awesome On The Jerrytron
Got an image you'd like to see in here first thing in the morning? Send it to [email protected]. Subject: Morning crap....
Winnipeg's Forecast Just Got A Lot Less Rainy
Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and the blogosphere to bring you everything you need to know to start your day...
Winnipeg Stockpiling Malcontents
Charles Rogers, the original Matt Millen WR bust, will be joining Pac Man in Winnipeg. Since his 2005 release, Rogers has been battling drug addition to return to football. He reportedly still owes the Lions $8.5 Million[PFT]...
Thomas Jones Had Some Festive Birthday Party Entertainment
You should see these ladies make balloon animals. It's a sight to behold. [JerseyChaser]...
Adam Jones Heads To Great White North
The Pack-Man, as I will always know him, signed a one-year deal with the Winnipeg Blue Bombers of the CFL. I wonder if NAFTA covers importation of strip club labor. [Canadian Press]...
The Cowboys Scoreboard Punter Drinking Game
You don't need a reason to drink this weekend, but you may need a reason to watch a 49ers-Cowboys preseason game that doesn't include "it was the only thing the sheriff would let me watch from the holding cell."...
Who Needs An Immigration Wall When You Have Chipper Jones?
The Atlanta Braves third baseman is an avid hunter and since his home rests on a tract of land near the Mexican border, he often encounters many of brave illegal immigrants stealthily en route to a better way of life....
Cowboys Stadium Offers Valuable Seating Behind This Brick Wall
We've already covered the new Cowboys Stadium's opulent luxury, from the $40 million scoreboard to the $60 pizzas. How about $75 seats where you can only see one-third of the playing field? Thank you, Jerry Jones for all your blessings!...
Moving Jerry's Big TV Wouldn't Be Cheap
According to Chris Mortensen's source with the Cowboys, raising the 72' high video screen would cost a minimum of $2 million (or 33,333 pizzas). No worries, Jerry Jones was already considering raising it to accommodate a U2 concert. [ESPN]...
Cowboys' Massive New Stadium Not Big Enough To Play Football In
Jerry Jones (and Texas taxpayers) spent $1.2 billion constructing an opulent state-of-the-art multi-use arena that's perfect for concerts, soccer matches, trade shows, Promise Keepers rallies, and even football games—provided that you don't allow either team to punt....
Chipper Jones' Death Ranch Claims Another Victim
A illegal immigrant was found dead on the Texas property owned by the Larry Jones family. (It's eight miles from the Rio Grande and 124 degrees. Do the math.) Unrelated: The Braves have hired new hitting coach Anton Chigurh. [Journal-Constitution]...
Guest Editor Intro: I Am Delusional and I Hate Winners
Good morning, sports fans. You are looking LIVE at—well, at a post I wrote yesterday and put in the can in advance....
Not A Game, We Talking 'Bout Malpractice
Tebucky Jones plans to sue New England's team doctors for misdiagnosing his injuries and ending his career. The Mets' class-action suit is still collecting plaintiffs. [NESN]...
CFL Lineman Sacks Purse Snatcher On Streets Of Edmonton
Because we all need to believe in the power of sport again, here's a story involving an athlete that has a happy ending. If reading about a thief get crunched by a professional football player makes you happy, that is....
A Funnier, Less Pottymouthed Pacman Making It Rain Video
It really shouldn't have taken this long for this to be made. But I think we're all glad it was....
Adam Jones "Makin' It Rain": The Video (NSFW)
We compared the Las Vegas Journal Review's massive feature on the Minxx strip club incident to the Warren Report, but now we finally have the Zapruder Film. Video (that's probably not safe work) of Adam "Pacman" Jones making it rain....
The "Pacman" Jones Strip Club Shooting Gets Its Warren Report
The Las Vegas Review-Journal has launched a massive three-part investigation into the strip club incident that cost Adam Jones a year of football and another man his ability to walk. Oh, the things we have seen .......
$1.5 Billion Doesn't Go As Far As You Think
Martellus Bennett takes you on an informative and possibly racist (just against the Chinese, though) tour of the new Cowboys stadium. Hope you like $14 BBQ sandwiches, Dallas fans! Someone has to pay for those video screens. [MartyBTV]...
Dallas Cowboys Get What They Want, When They Want It
Irving, Texas, officials possibly suspect that the Cowboy's practice bubble that collapsed last month may have lacked some structure integrity. (Ya think?) They're fairly confident, however, that anyone other than the Cowboys would never have been allowed to build it....
One Cowboys' Scouting Assistant Paralyzed Due To Practice Facility Collapse
Two other staffers also required surgery to mend their broken body parts. Jerry Jones was reported to be "somber" after hearing the news. [AP/LA Times]...