josecanseco Page 4 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

In His Latest Meltdown, Jose Canseco Decided To Publicize His Girlfriend's Phone Number, Drug Of Choice
What started with Jose Canseco's Thursday announcement that "I am asking leila shennib to marry me .will you marry me" has somehow gone off the rails. Imagine that....

Stories That Don't Suck: SportsFeat's Guide To The Ballplayer's Twilight
Every Friday, SportsFeat picks a few great weekend reads for Deadspin. In honor of Derek Jeter and his labored quest for 3,000 hits, here are well-told stories of ballplayers just before, in the years after, or at the exact moment they retired....

Tim Thomas Will Fight Every One Of You Canadian Bastards If He Has To
Your morning roundup for June 9, the day we thanked our lucky stars we weren't hitting coaches....

Jose Canseco Tweets Obsession With Lady Gaga, But He Spurned Madonna, So...
Okay, I suppose there are a lot of things a little wrong with Jose Canseco's latest Twitter freakout, but there's a whole plane full of parallels we can't miss. And those parallels make this much more than the ramblings dribbling out of a disgraced slugger's Dorito-dusted fingers....

Watch Jose Canseco Pitch A Reality Show To TruTV From His Cellphone
Last we caught up with Jose Canseco, he sent his twin brother to a celebrity boxing match in his place. This time, well, he's just seeing what a cruel bitch mainstream media can be....

Jose Canseco's Latest Tragicomedy Plays Out On Boston Radio
The controversy over Jose Canseco's no-show at one of his silly celebrity boxing matches has reached almost a full week of coverage thanks to the public piss-off between Jose and promoter Damon Feldman. Did Jose knowingly dick over the fight promoter and send his twin brother Ozzie to fight for him...

The Weeping Kansas Jayhawk, In Happier Times
Your morning roundup for March 28, the day Lindsay became the artist formerly known as Lindsay Lohan....

Scenes From A Pittsburgh Restroom
Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and internets to bring you everything you need to know to start your day....

Jon Heyman Is Confused About Why He Hates Jose Canseco
Sports Illustrated's Jon Heyman (the real one this time!) took to Twitter to chastise Canseco for, well, two contradictory reasons....

Jose Canseco Officially Entered The End Stages Of Desperation
If you thought the whole "Call me now" development was the limbo lowest, you were wrong. Around 2 a.m. EST, Jose Canseco declared, "I will not give up the dream of playing in the majors again, I just can't."...

Lonely Jose Canseco Would Like You To Call Him To Talk About His Life
310 862 6309 I am ready for you call me now let's talk.you will be charged a small fee half of it will go to a charity Remember the "charity" is most likely "The Lonely Jose Canseco Fund." [Twitter]...

Video: We Ask Jose Canseco About His Missing Chandeliers
Earlier today, I scuttled over to 8th and Broadway in Manhattan. The goal: ask Jose Canseco if he'd gotten his "chandeleers" back. Was it a success? Yes. Yes, it was. As much as anything involving Jose Canseco can be called a success....

Will Someone Please Help Jose Canseco Get His Decorative Light Fixtures Back?
There is so much compressed sadness in this one tweet that I think we can now upgrade Jose Canseco from professional sad sack to existential hero. I mean, at this point would you be at all surprised if his next tweet were, "woke up from uneazy dreams now ima bug ,help"?...

Can Statistics Prove Once And For All Who Used Steroids?
Two labor economists released a study showing an increase in power numbers by Canseco's teammates which abruptly stopped when MLB instituted random steroid testing. Unfortunately, it also predicts another cycle of "I Guess We Have To Listen To Jose Canseco" talk. [Slate]...

Down Goes Probert
What, too soon? My bad, but make no mistake about this fact: It's quintessentially bad-ass to have your coffin transported via motorcycle sidecar to your funeral, which is exactly what was done for the late Bob Probert yesterday....

Roger Clemens Is The One Guy Jose Canseco Won't Rat Out
Jose Canseco told a grand jury that he never saw Roger Clemens use steroids....and he sees everything. I forget if Canseco is the "lone honest human" or "embarrassment to humanity" this month. [Daily News]...

A Salute To Jose Canseco's Many Failures (Gallery)
Yesterday was the 17th anniversary of Jose Canseco taking a Carlos Martinez fly ball off the noggin for a home run. It was also the first anniversary of his MMA debut. Both are indelible moments in failuredom. Let's examine some Kanseco Klassics....

Jose Canseco Particularly Concerned With Government-Ordered Extermination
Canseco, never one to filter his thoughts on Twitter, outdid himself this week. Sure, it's all likely part of some desperate attempt to drum up publicity, but...uh...damn. You're welcome, I guess. High(?)lights below:...

Florida Marlins More Popular Than Ever In Restrooms
Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and the blogosphere to bring you everything you need to know to start your day....

Jose Canseco, Always Known For Attention To Privacy
Canseco and his girlfriend (or split personality) are currently carrying out a spat on Twitter. I just want to know which one just called me "sweetie," because I'm a little turned on. [@josecanseco]...