k Page 4222 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Ron Jaworski Finds A Home
If I had to rank all of the professional football broadcasts that ABC's done in the last six months, I'd say that the Chicago Rush vs. Kansas City Brigade Arena Football game they just had was number one. It was their best effort. Beyond that, every broadcast involving Tony Kornheiser is tied for la...

The Anticlimactic Retirement of Jake Plummer
I didn't believe Jake Plummer when he said he was considering retiring. I'm not sure why. Maybe it was because I was looking forward to many more years of exciting, high-level Jake-the-Snake football... but I sort of doubt that....

The Money's Out There, You Pick It Up, It's Yours
Let's get caught up again with the orgy of NFL free agent activity. If you're an NFL player, and your agent couldn't work it out so you were a free agent this off-season, you should probably fire him....

College Hoops Comendium: Four More on the Dance Floor
• Winthrop 84, VMI 81. VMI is the team that aspires to play like the Phoenix Suns on crystal meth. They average over 100 a game, and while it might have been fun to see them have a go in the tournament... they were 14-19, and didn't deserve the bid. Winthrop's now won 7 conference tournaments in 9 y...

Jake Plummer Will Spread Peace Everywhere But Tampa Bay
You've probably heard by now that Jake Plummer threatened to retire from the NFL just as the Broncos were attempting to trade him to Tampa Bay. Jake is serious with the retirement talk, according to those close to him, and he just might spend that retirement making the world a better place. Via Mich...

The Back Of Ron Artest's Head Is A Canvas
With the NBA's trading deadline passed, Ron Artest finally felt it was safe to have his love for the Kings proclaimed boldly on the back of his head. He debuted the new look in last night's win over the Lakers....

NFL General Managers Make It Rain
The first twenty-four hours of the NFL's free agency period have come and gone. There was a flurry of activity last evening ... let's get ourselves caught up....

We Have Dancing Quakers
You can start filling out your tournament bracket ... at least one tiny little inconsequential part of it. The Pennsylvania Quakers have let their Inner Light guide them into the NCAA tournament. With their 86-58 win last night over Yale, Penn becomes the Ivy League champ, and thus, the first team t...

Week In Review: The Smokey Tornado
• Goodbye, Balls. • We guarantee you Dick Vitale's Betamax is flashing 12:00. • It's good to be Brian Urlacher. • Tommy Lasorda claims he doesn't pay for sex, but we know better. • We'll take a camouflage Bible over a neon bible, anytime. • Sorry! • You absolutely cannot kill Rulon Gardner. • Whom s...

Who Wouldn't Want This On Their Mantle?
Because we've fallen into the strange rut about writing about the groin areas of men in our late-day posts of late ... here's another one!...

Cultural Oddsmaker: Who'll Be The Least Popular During ESPN The Weekend?
AJ Daulerio's Cultural Oddsmaker runs every Friday. Email him and let him know what you think....

Baseball Season Preview: Colorado Rockies
You might remember, from back at the beginning of the NFL season, when we previewed each team by having a writer we liked write about their favorite team....

Stupid Sexy Jockeys ...
What could be worse than being busted for marijuana in a random drug test? Well, perhaps being known for the rest of your life as "The Dildo Jockey." Yeah, that would be a little embarrassing, we think....

Bad Dentist ... Bad, Bad Dentist
This man right here is Larry Rosenthal, and he's a dentist on Manhattan's Upper East Side neighborhood. He also lives in the building that the late Yankees pitcher Cory Lidle crashed his plane into last October. This so bothered him that he's suing the Lidle family for $7 million. Not the city: Lidl...

NBA Roundup: Cowabunga, Dude!
Notes on Thursday's games in the National Basketball Association ......

Always, Always Be Wearing A Cup. Always.
All right, when a story starts with this lede ......

Idaho, Remaining On The Cutting Edge Of Video Game Technology
So this is enough to make one happy: The cover boy for the new EA Sports NCAA Football 2008 game is ... Boise State quarterback Jared Zabransky!...

Ricky Williams, Now 57 Percent More Deep!
The ludicrously stretched gentleman here — if we could do that, we'd never leave the house! — is Ricky Williams, and if you're the type to never get tired of Ricky Williams stories, well, here's another one....

Beer Barons And Canadian Bloggers Just Can't Seem To Get Along
This man is Frank D'Angelo, a "beer baron" and general Canadian raconteur. He's also, oh, a bit of a dope. After Canadian blogger — bloggers are so cute when they're Canadian — Neate Sager at Out Of Left Field made fun of D'Angelo a few times, the phonetically challenged fellow sent a nasty "seize" ...

Barry Bonds Never Can Say Goodbye
The most telling exceprt from KGO radio's big interview with Barry Bonds on Tuesday? It wasn't that Bonds has apparently been getting death threats (there's enough nuts out there to make that sadly inevitable). Nor was it that Bonds says he feels "exhausted" (honestly, when hasn't he?). We're not ev...