k Page 4224 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

They Must Have An Interesting Logo
This is extremely juvenile, even for me... but when Butt Daredevils invade the sports world, I feel like you have a right to know. What you see above is a brief CBA game recap from the Pittsburgh Post-Gazette, with either an unfortunate typo (which has since been fixed), or a copy editor who's lashi...

Unbagged Heads Prevail
Will told you earlier in the week about the struggles of the East Carolina basketball team, and their fans' plan to show up at the final home game of the year with bags on their heads. As far as I can tell, last night against UTEP, there were no bags (I can find no mention of them)... and the ECU Pi...

College Hoops Compendium: Noah Disappoints
• LSU 66, (3) Florida 56. Joakim Noah: 4 points, 3 rebounds, 0 swipes at cheerleaders, 0 sissy arguments with opposing coaches about who gets to hold the basketball. We expect a higher level of production all around, Joakim. See that it doesn't happen again. Florida was never really close past three...

I Agree Completely, He Really Shouldn't Have Made It Rain
I hope that one more post doesn't overdo it on the Pacman Jones story, but I did particularly enjoy this report from WSMV in Nashville. One line in particular really does tell you all you need to know. "He shouldn't have made it rain, then." Yes....

At Least He Doesn't Have AIDS
Lennox Lewis wants to make a comeback to the boxing ring. Who's he going to fight? Someone else who's coming out of retirement, of course, because that's all that's really left in boxing. An old-timers day in boxing would be rather redundant....

Vladimir Radmanovic: Good At Telling The Truth, Lousy At Snowboarding
This is so cute. Lakers forward Vladimir Radmanovic going to miss about eight weeks of action because of a separated shoulder, an injury he attributed to slipping on some ice. That wasn't the truth, though. And the nagging pangs of guilt brought on by his dishonesty finally got to be too much for hi...

Week In Review: Gobble...Gobble...Make It Rain
• The week just kept getting worse and worse for Pacman Jones. • Peeing in the backseat of a cop car? Bad idea. • Michael Irvin, ESPN hardly knew ye. • Taking way too long to destroy a mascot. • This is what it has come to: Rocky Balboa is on steroids. • One bad-ass hockey fight. • Tom Brady, procre...

Randy Johnson Would Rather You Didn't Watch 'Music And Lyrics'
Here's an Arizona Diamondbacks newspaper ad, as scanned by Diamondhacks, in which we see an interesting marketing strategy. OK, we're guys, right? Guys like baseball. So if we guys don't stick together and, like, buy Diamondbacks season tickets, our girlfriends might make us go see Because I Said So...

Cultural Oddsmaker: Who'll Be Next On Dancing With The Stars?
AJ Daulerio's Cultural Oddsmaker runs every Friday. Email him to let him know what you think....

Tim Hardway Does Not Have A Hate Boner
Fascinating interview yesterday with the beautifully thighed Tim Hardaway and his "old pal" Scoop Jackson. Say what you will about Jackson, but this is one of those times when his friendliness with athletes works to his advantage; it's a wide-ranging, full-access interview that doesn't tip-toe aroun...

Fuzzy Zoeller Is Not Happy With A Bored Law Firm Worker
You thought Jay Mariotti was the only person overly sensitive to Wikipedia criticism, but apparently golfer Fuzzy Zoeller is even worse about it: He's a law firm with an employee he believes posted defamatory statements about him on the site....

Those Aren't Bags: They're Instruments Of Death
The East Carolina Pirates are having a tough year. They're 5-21, 0-13 in Conference USA, they've lost 13 in a row and 19 of their last 20, and they just lost a heartbreaker to Marshall at home. It's not a good time in Greenville....

ESPN: We Pan The Crowd, You Decide
Look, according to union rules, technicians in the ESPN video truck get one 15-minute coffee break every two hours. So if you're the director, sometimes you need to delegate. "Go ahead and choose which section of the crowd to pan, Buzz. I'm finishing my danish." Or, you know, perhaps every fifth per...

The Last Night Of The Chief
Last night, as tons of teary-eyed Central Illinoisians will tell you this morning, was the final dance of Chief Illiniwek, the skipping, painted white-guy-dressed-up-as-Injun who has "performed" at halftime of our alma mater's sporting events for the last 80 years or so. Like most alums — or at leas...

That's How You Celebrate A Goal
Another reason to tentatively, cautiously warm up to soccer: When one of its players beats up a teammate with a golf club for refusing to join him in karaoke, he's not beneath celebrating a goal the next week by swinging an air golf club feverishly. This is like, say, Pacman Jones celebrating a touc...

Moon Over Mormon Country
Here's the word from the official USC ice hockey site, which was on the scene as the Trojans ended their season with a 6-4 loss in the ACHA playoffs to BYU this past weekend:...

Britney Spears And Minor League Hockey; A Match Made In Heaven
We really don't know how to say this so we're just going to say it: The Syracuse Crunch of the American Hockey League is offering any woman who shaves her head a free ticket to their game on Saturday against the Manitoba Moose. (Terrorists throw down their weapons in disgust, give up)....

Look, Look, Gonzaga Drugs!
Today's public service journalism award goes to The Spokesman-Review in Spokane, Wash., who have included, in their update on Gonzaga forward Josh Heytvelt's arrest for drug possession, a full on photo gallery of the controlled substances. That's right: The visual cornucopia that is psilocybin is th...

Baseball Season Preview: New York Mets
You might remember, from back at the beginning of the NFL season, when we previewed each team by having a writer we liked write about their favorite team....

We're So Sorry, Uncle Albert
Look, we're still a little unclear on why the University of Florida's mascot statue, Albert the Alligator, was placed on the Ohio State campus recently (some kind of a Nike promotion or something). All we know is that it took more than five hours for students there to destroy it, which is simply una...