lastnightswinner Page 5 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Last Night's Winner: Mossholes
In sports, everyone is a winner—some people just win better than others. Like all those "Patriot Way" fetishists in New England, now freed from the tyranny of watching the greatest deep threat the NFL has ever seen....
Last Night's Winner: The Greatest Hitter In Japanese History, This Ginger Kid
In sports, everyone is a winner-some people just win better than others. Like Japan's new all-time single-season hits leader, Matt Murton. Yes, the same Matt Murton who washed out in Chicago, Oakland and Colorado....
Weekend Winner: The Morons Of The NFL
In sports, everyone is a winner-some people just win better than others. Like Andy Reid, Jim Caldwell and Nate Clements, who proved that of all the metrics and intangibles required for NFL success, having a single goddamned brain cell is most important....
Last Night's Winner: Women
In sports, everyone is a winner-some people just win better than others. Like female sports fans out there, who are finally getting an ESPN of their very own. Say hello to espnW, coming soon to (maybe) a television near you....
Last Night's Winner: Pedro Martinez, The Only Tolerable Part Of Ken Burns's <em>Tenth Inning</em>
In sports, everyone is a winner—some people just win better than others. Like Pedro Martinez, whose small bit of screen-time yesterday was the only part of Ken Burns's sad-bugle-and-Bob-Costas extravaganza that was worth a damn....
Last Night's Winner: Quarterback In A Bra!
In sports, everyone is a winner-some people just win better than others. Like CFL QB Henry Burris, photographed wearing a bra, with a woman who's not his wife. Oh, and the pictures fell into the hands of the fanbase he spurned....
Last Night's Winner: All The Tired Clichés About Baseball In Florida
In sports, everyone is a winner-some people just win better than others. Like Rays fans, who get to read this morning about how they're pathetic, just because they didn't show up to a meaningless, late-September, Monday night game against a last-place team....
Weekend Winner: New York Jets, Enablers
In sports, everyone is a winner-some people just win better than others. Like alleged drunk driver Braylon Edwards, whose blood alcohol content was twice the legal limit not a week before he scored the touchdown that put the Jets ahead for good....
Last Night's Winner: Felix Hernandez's Chances Of Not Getting Jobbed Out Of A Cy Young
In sports, everyone is a winner—some people just win better than others. Like Felix Hernandez, who probably locked up his Cy Young last night along about the time the Rays hung their seventh run on CC Sabathia....
Last Night's Winner: ESPN's LeBron Impartiality
In sports, everyone is a winner-some people just win better than others. Like ESPN for being completely impartial in regards to LeBron James and then announcing they were amping up their LeBron coverage to an absurd degree....
Last Night's Winner: Matt Diaz, Corner Outfield Vigilante
In sports, everyone is a winner—some people just win better than others. Like visiting players at Citizens Bank Park, who, since the Taser incident, are apparently the last line of defense against fans on the field....
Weekend Winner: Sparty's Balls (If Not His Vascular System)
In sports, everyone is a winner—some people just win better than others. Like Michigan State coach Mark Dantonio, who beat Notre Dame on a wonderfully idiotic fake field goal in overtime and then survived a "minor" heart attack....
Last Night's Winner: Mississippi Valley State's Airline Miles
In sports, everyone is a winner-some people just win better than others. Like the MVSU Delta Devils, who will play their entire nonconference schedule on the road, because the program really really needs the appearance fees....
Last Night's Winner: Criminal Yankee Fans
In sports, everyone is a winner-some people just win better than others. Like New York City's criminals, who apparently wear Yankee caps in disproportionate numbers. I too own a Yankee cap (pictured), so I thought I'd take a look at this trend....
Last Night's Winner: Naughty Text Messaging
In sports, everyone is a winner—some people just win better than others. Like Chris Rainey and Francisco Rodriguez, who allegedly sent their sometime ladyfriends the sort of text messages that our country's law enforcement frown upon....
Weekend Winner: NFL Rule 8, Section 1, Article 4
In sports, everyone is a winner—some people just win better than others. Like the "going to the ground" rule, which cost the Lions a victory yesterday and which comes from a part of the rulebook apparently written in crayon....
Last Night's Winner: Tom Brady's Indomitable Will
In sports, everyone is a winner—some people just win better than others. Like Tom Brady, who had kind of a big day yesterday....
Last Night's Winner: Mike Krzyzewski, Restarting The Cold War
In sports, everyone is a winner-some people just win better than others. Like the revival of Soviet-American tensions, exacerbated by a little trash talking from Coach K at the FIBA World Championships. Duck and cover, kids...
Last Night's Winner: Nationals Fans, Bargain Hunters
In sports, everyone is a winner—some people just win better than others. Like the 2011 Nationals diehards, who, if they buy two season tickets, will get two free. Now if only someone can find three other Nats fans....
Last Night's Winner: Boise State's Bogus BCS Busting
In sports, everyone is a winner-some people just win better than others. Like those media darling Broncos, who proved they belong in the National Championship discussion. Unfortunately, they won't prove it again, yet people won't be able to shut up about them....