law Page 74 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Frivolous Lawsuit Theater: Court Bitchslaps Wannabe Cheerleader
This is a story of how awful high school girls are, and how petty cheerleading politics can be, and how an overbearing stage mom get take this bullshit all the way to a federal appeals court. But mostly it's the story of how satisfying it can be to see justice done, with usually staid jurists writin...
Upcoming Reality Show Will Follow Sheriff's Deputy Butterbean Around
Step aside, Steven Seagal: Lawman. There's a new novelty cop in town, and, well, it's former heavyweight fighter Butterbean....
Michael Jordan's High School Girlfriend Plans To Take Legal Action Over Love Letter
The adorable love letter Michael Jordan wrote to his high school sweetheart, Laquetta Robinson, is probably going to end up in a lawsuit. Ah, American love....
Ohio-Based Lady Sues Kobe Bryant For Not Marrying Her
Kobe Bryant has five rings. But now one litigious soul is livid that she didn't get one from him....
This Wasn't The First Time Mr. Handy H. Wood Of Duncannon, Pa. Was Arrested For Exposing Himself
Handy H. Wood, 35, was charged with exposing himself to a McDonald's drive-thru clerk on May 17. Mr. Wood was also charged with exposing himself to a woman in the Giant/Rite Aid shopping center parking lot on May 29. Finally, Mr. Wood was arrested for exposing himself to a woman in another shopping...
Supreme Court Wisely Declines To Hear Roger Clemens' Dumbass Appeal
Reassuring news out of DC today: the US Supreme Court—which hears less than one percent of the cases appealed there anyway—has declined to hear Roger Clemens' appeal re: his silly defamation case against former trainer Brian McNamee. Many moons ago, Clemens sued McNamee after he dished on Clemens' s...
Real Housewives Of Beverly Hills Ruin NHL Awards With Confident, Butchered Pronunciation
Real Housewives Camille Grammer—Kelsey's ex—and Adrienne Maloof—sister of those bankrupt rich man-children who allegedly own the Sacramento Kings—presented the Lady Byng Trophy to Tampa Bay Lightning right wing Martin St. Louis at Wednesday's NHL Awards show. St. Louis is a six-time All-Star, he w...
Daniel Sedin Wins The Important Hardware: A Broken Trophy
The NHL awards were last night; we didn't watch. (Mostly a Jay Mohr thing.) So we couldn't tell you what outfit the readers of Seventeen picked out for Jeff Skinner, or if the pointless Jennings Trophy was handed beforehand, like the technical Oscars....
Jay Mohr And That Wretched "Like A G6" Band Will Perform At The NHL Awards Tonight, Everybody
Here is a list of the non-hockey stars—"some of the biggest names in Hollywood"—the NHL will have on hand tonight for its Las Vegas awards ceremony (7 p.m., Versus): Jon Hamm, Jerry Bruckheimer, Kevin Smith, Jennifer Beals. OK, if not quite A-list, definitely a list. Unfortunately, they accompany re...
The Brilliant Legal Mind Behind Mark Cuban's "Fuck You" Brief
We had to ask Mark Cuban for comment on today's legal filing, which consisted of a photo of the Mavericks celebrating a title. It's a dagger of a brief in the face of a suit accusing him of mismanaging the team, and it shuts down any comebacks. But Cuban deflected credit, telling us "it was all the ...
Mark Cuban Files The Ultimate "Fuck You" Legal Brief
"Scoreboard," the defendant said. ...
Litigious, Displaced, Already Reiumbursed Super Bowl Fans Are Asking For Even More Money
Hey, remember those cranky folks who couldn't get their Super Bowl seats? Remember how they're suing, and how $5 million wouldn't be enough in remuneration?...
Will Daniel Snyder's Lawsuit Be Dismissed As A Nuisance?
Washington City Paper reports that it filed papers today asking the D.C. Superior Court to dismiss the lawsuit filed by Washington NFL owner Daniel Snyder over Dave McKenna's Cranky Redskin Fan's Guide to Dan Snyder. The paper is arguing that Snyder's suit violates Washington, D.C.'s anti-SLAPP law:...
Dan Snyder's Latest Media Blitz Makes Everyone Look Like A Simpering Ass
Dan Snyder doesn't do many interviews. The reason: When Dan Snyder opens his mouth, he embarrasses himself. The Redskins owner appears comfortable only when speaking in sound bites about how his blood runs "burgundy and gold." So it came as a surprise last week when Snyder sat down with the DC aff...
Lance Armstrong Wants TV Show To Say It's Sorry
"In a letter sent Wednesday to CBS News chairman and '60 Minutes' executive producer Jeff Fager, lawyer Elliot Peters said the May 22 segment about Armstrong was built on a series of falsehoods, and he accused the reputable CBS show of sloppy journalism." [ESPN, PDF of letter here]...
FC Barcelona Proved They Were The Best Team In All Of Professional Sports Yesterday
Your morning roundup for May 29, the day Roger Ebert inexplicably gave two thumbs down to those who blatantly allowed two eyes to check out two foreign boobs....
Satirical, Non-Libelous Dan Snyder Group Fiction, Part IV: Cooke And Bligle Jim Escape To The Potomac
Here's your daily link to Dave McKenna's brilliant "Cranky Redskins Fan's Guide to Dan Snyder," which we'll be posting until Dan Snyder's dumbass libel suit chokes on a crab puff at a cocktail party. (For those of you keeping track, this is "We Are All Dave McKenna CX.")...
Satirical, Non-Libelous Dan Snyder Group Fiction, Part III: The Fetid Breath Of The Bligle
Here's your daily link to Dave McKenna's brilliant "Cranky Redskins Fan's Guide to Dan Snyder," which we'll be posting until Dan Snyder's dumbass libel suit chokes on a crab puff at a cocktail party. (For those of you keeping track, this is "We Are All Dave McKenna CV.")...
David Kahn Sort Of Accuses Stern Of Fixing Lottery So Gilbert's Sick Kid Would Win
So we told you about Dan Gilbert's son, who won the draft lottery tonight, but was born with neurofibromatosis, a disease that means tumors can grow throughout his body without warning....
Older Charles Oakley Responds To Violence With Lawsuits Instead Of Fists
Former Knicks/Bulls/Wizards/Raptors/Rockets enforcer and current Charlotte Bobcats assistant coach Charles Oakley is suing the Aria hotel-casino at MGM's CityCenter complex in Vegas because security delivered onto him a "gang-style beat down" when he tried to get into the VIP-pool area. This alleg...