law Page 79 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Dodgeball Lawsuit Makes Me Fear For The Manliness Of Our Youth
A kid got nailed in the face during a dodgeball game at his school, and now he might sue the city. Maybe he needs to sue evolution for not giving him the reflexes to survive in middle school gym class....
Makers Of Madden Face Lawsuit For Eliminating The Competition
We get it; you love Madden. You buy it every year. But wouldn't it be awesome if there were another football game available? Join this class action suit against EA, and you might get one. Or at least some cash....
And Now Some Updates On The Sean Salisbury Lawsuit
No comment, no comment. No comment no comment no comment, no comment. No comment no comment, no comment, no, comment, no comment. No comment. [Mckinney Courier-Gazette]...
Soon We'll Just Make Him Attorney General
A new team, a new jurisdiction; Shaq has applied to become a deputy sheriff in Cleveland. This shows me he's entirely unfamiliar with the city, which was long ago abandoned to lawlessness. [AP]...
Sean Salisbury's Lawsuit
It has arrived. The suit says Deadspin has cost Mr. Salisbury money, future employment, and mental stability due to its repeated malicious attacks, which Salisbury himself noted several times via his iPhone meltdown last month. All aboard....
Searching For Jose Lima: Next Stop...Dominican Republic
Lost in all the chaos of last week was the news that our half-assed search for Jose Lima at the behest of his ex-wife Melissa, may have actually proved successful. Lima Time is currently taking place for the Águilas Cibaeñas...
Cheddar Plax Jokes Get NYPD In Hot Water
You shoot yourself in the leg, people are going to say you pulled a Plaxico. Sorry, that's how it is. But one teen is suing the cops for making just that obvious joke....
Cranky Old Man Goes Mike Tyson On Neighbors
When the local kids' football landed in his yard, a Michigan man reacted as any of us would: he bit one of their dads on the face. [Sports Rubbish]...
"Motherf***er Hit My Penis"
Minnesota's Simoni Lawrence crotches himself on a yard marker, and provides us with a contender for quote of the year....
And After He Took The Shot, He Beat The Crap Out Of Both Of Them
Got an image you'd like to see in here first thing in the morning? Send it to [email protected]. Subject: Morning crap...
Yankees More Than Willing To Employ Crazy Old Men
Senior citizens are suing the Bombers for age discrimination after one was asked in a job interview, "What could someone 73 years old offer the Yankees?" I don't know...lunatic micromanagement and a Dave Winfield blackmail file? [NYPost]...
FCC Is Still Worried About Janet Jackson's Boob
It's been almost six years since that horrible day when America first learned about the female breast and the Federal Communications Commission is still trying to find a way to punish someone for the infamous Super Bowl Nipple Fest....
Your Disdain for America Will Not Be Tolerated by the Newark Bears
Thomas Cetnar, an ex-cop convicted of stealing drug money, owns the Newark Bears, a minor league team managed by Tim Raines. Cetnar ejected three teenagers for not standing during "God Bless America." They're now suing him in federal court....
Roger Clemens Suit Against Brian McNamee Dismissed
A Texas judge dismissed Clemens' defamation lawsuit against his former trainer Brian McNamee, but McNamee's defamation suit against Clemens will continue in New York. Does anyone even remember what these two lovebirds are fighting about? [Daily News]...
Court Tells Feds That 2003 Steroid List Does Not Belong To Them
A U.S. appeals court laid the smack down on the Justice Department this week, ruling that the MLB steroid test results that keeps conveniently leaking to the press should have never have been given to prosecutors to begin with....
Poor Lawrence Tynes
The Giants' kicker was forced to show off his hamstring flexibility with The Rockettes (and Santa!) in the middle of the 6th Avenue to prove his knee is fully rehabilitated from last year. Coughlin's a tough sonuvabitch. [Best Week Ever]...
Delaware Loses Gambling Lawsuit, Also Fails To Cover
A Federal Appeals court sided with major sports leagues and struck down Delaware's plan to offer sports betting this fall. The integrity of sports is saved! Isn't that wonderful?...
Meet Crusher, Nightmare Ant's Crustacean Relation
Got an image you'd like to see in here first thing in the morning? Send it to [email protected]. Subject: Morning crap....
Ben Roethlisberger's Lawyers Stay On The Offensive
Big Ben's legal team released a series of emails and instant messages sent by his accuser that they say "prove" he did not rape that woman, Andrea McNulty. If IM messages are now irrefutable evidence, then may I suggest this....
The Long Strange Sad Journey Of Lawrence Phillips
Former Nebraska/NFL running back Lawrence Phillips was convicted of seven felony charges yesterday and faces up to 25 years in prison, but he's already in jail, serving a 10-year sentence for another crime. How did it come to this?...