layoffs Page 183 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
If You Throw An Octopus On The Ice in Detroit You Could Be Fined $500 And Ejected (UPDATE: Statements from Red Wings, Police)
Tommy B. got home from last night's Detroit/Phoenix game but despite a Game One victory, he was sad. Sad because he had a run-in with Johnny Law. This, because he threw an octopus on the ice....
Semin Leads The Capitals To Sweet, Sweaty Extended-Time Victory
Your morning roundup for April 14, the day San Dimas High School football no longer rules in the eyes of the Chinese government....
Your Start Of The National Hockey League Playoffs Open Thread
So, the hockey season that actually matters is about to start, with the Phoenix Kai Oats visiting the Red Wings (Nos. 6 and 3 in the Western Conference respectively) and the Tampa Bay Lightning heading to Pittsburgh for some 4-versus-5 eastside action....
Dueling Mullets Welcome You To Day One Of The NHL Playoffs
Your morning roundup for April 13, the day Justin Bieber reminded us that the Middle East is still fucked up....
This Celtics Lowlight Is The Most B-Team Clip Ever
See Von Wafer swoop down the lane. See Von Wafer miss on a wide-open dunk. See Von Wafer believe that he has made the dunk. See Von Wafer face the crowd in celebration. See Von Wafer turn and collide with his teammate, who has collected his offensive board. See Von Wafer make his teammate, Jermain...
Derrick Rose Floats One Off The Glass, And The Bulls Take The East
Last night, the Chicago Bulls defeated the Celtics by 16 points, 97-81. In doing so, they effectively clinched the top seed in the Eastern Conference for the first time since the 1997-98 season — Chicago would have to lose the remainder of its games and the HeatCeltics would have to win the rest o...
MLS Playoffs To Admit More Good Teams, Bad Teams, Possibly Your Grandmother
Getting into the MLS playoffs this year will be about as difficult as securing admission to the dogshit community college down the road from you. That's because the wise men who run the MLS have decided to let two more crap teams into a playoff system that not only confuses foreign players accustome...
Tecmo Marshawn Lynch Channels Tecmo Christian Okoye
Marshawn Lynch's 67-yard run has already been recreated in Tecmo Bowl, with former Seahawk Steve Raible providing the call. Check it out. But remember: Only one player in Tecmo Bowl could really break tackles like this. He hailed from Nigeria....
Your Unpredictable Packers-Eagles Open Thread
Michael Vick's thigh carries some bruises into this game against a less-than-stellar Packers run defense. And who knows what Mike McCarthy will do? The Green Bay coach likes to roll the dice. This one should be fun....
Your Germ-Free Chiefs-Ravens Open Thread
Joe Cool goes up against Brady's backup. Ed Reed's brother goes missing. And Jamaal Charles appears to have dodged the flu, thanks to an advanced hygiene routine Chiefs coach Todd Haley put in place before the game....
Watch Marshawn Lynch Geaux To The House
The Seahawks salted away the Saints with the play you see here. Sorry, Marcus Allen. You can have your 74 yards and Facenda voiceover. Marshawn Lynch just gave us the most "holy shit" run in postseason history....
Your Happy-Footed Jets-Colts Open Thread
With the wheezing green clown car that is the New York Jets football club lurching into a wild card berth, we are guaranteed at least one more opportunity for an awkward fetishist press conference that will eventually become a Coors Light ad....
Your Medium-Sized Seahawks-Saints Open Thread
If the Seahawks win this game, there is no god. Unless –- wait — there is a god and he is prone to merciful acts such as that time when the Seahawks made the playoffs with a losing record....
Qwest Field Says Its Beers Were Actually A Great Deal. Are They Drunk?
Qwest Field was exposed yesterday as a temple of avarice and graft, where honest fans buying large beers were duped into paying for medium-size beers. Qwest Field has been exposed today as the headquarters of a cut-rate spin machine....
Should NFL Teams Start Overtime With An Onside Kick?
Brian Burke's calculator says yes. [Slate]...
Last Night's Winner: The Case For The BCS In The NFL
Just what was Derek Anderson laughing about? We're just guessing, but maybe it's the fact that his Cardinals, at 3-7, are just two games out of first. Someone's going to win that division, and they might not even be bowl-eligible....
Is This The Machine Or An Imposter On The Tonight Show?
Click to view Brian Wilson took his routine to The Tonight Show last night and—among other things—introduced The Machine to the Jaywalking-loving audience (around the 3:30 mark). Either Pat Burrell gained weight, or we have a whole new mystery on our hands....
A Roundup Of Happy San Franciscans Yelling About The Giants
In an interview with Karl Ravech following Game 5, Giants ace Tim Lincecum said he hoped "a lot of beer [was] flowing and [a lot of] smoke [was] in the air." San Francisco did not disappoint Timmy....
An 86-Yard Punt Becomes Possible With Gale Force Winds (Update)
Last Tuesday's Washington-Huron playoff game featured this ridiculous punt from Huron's Derek Zwanziger. After a real boomer, the ball rolls, and rolls, then rolls a little more until Zwanziger's netted an 86-yarder. South Dakota high school football and science rule. [Argus Leader]...
For The First Time Ever, San Franciscans Are On Top Of A Muni Bus, Not Beneath It
Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and internets to bring you everything you need to know to start your day....