layoffs Page 189 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

The Best Place To Get In A Bar Fight This Sunday
When Viking fans in New York City want to watch Vikings games, they go to a place called Bar None. When Saints fans in New York City want to watch Saints games, they go to the exact same bar. Uh-oh....

Nate Kaeding Suicide Joke Watch
Did you hear Nate Kaeding tried to commit suicide last night, but was unsuccessful because he's terrible at kicking footballs? Yes, San Diego's kicker is not a beloved man right now....unless you love terrible internet jokes. Then he's a godsend!...

AFC Playoff Open Thread: Poise. Unseasonable Warmth. Go.
Will playoff Norv Turner rear his ugly, ugly head? Will Rex Ryan declare the Jets bigger than Jesus? Discuss the unsexiest of playoff matchups in the comments. [NFL.com]...

NFC Playoff Open Thread: Romo. Favre. Ad Nauseam. Go.
On the plus side, you'll stop hearing about one of these QBs after today. On the minus side, you'll definitely continue hearing about the other. Choose your preferred natural disaster in the comments. [NFL.com]...

AFC Playoff Open Thread: Flaccos. Mannings. Go.
The Baltimore Ravens were my mid-season Super Bowl pick and I'm sticking to it. Even if they lose. Peyton Manning is out to prove he can go deep in the playoffs without Dungy and his reliable receiver-who-possibly-shot-some-guy. [NFL.com]...

Romo-Favre Manlove Getting A Little Unbearable
Thank goodness the game's just two days away. We're dangerously close to the two just calling a press conference and fellating each other in front of the assembled media....

Ravens To Appease Football Gods With Ritual Animal Slaughter
Baltimore will display the lobsters won in a bet with Massachusetts's governor last week, as a warning to the Colts tomorrow. It's better than that time Ray Lewis sacrificed two people, and won the Super Bowl the next year. [AP]...

Even Some NFL Players Never Get Over High School
Second-round subplot that also makes convenient mid-week playoff filler: Jets wideout Jerricho Cotchery seeks to avenge himself upon Chargers QB (and former college teammate) Phillip Rivers over a high school playoff defeat. HOW DOES HE SLEEP?! [NYPost, via SSF]...

Everybody Loves Kurt Warner...Except One Former California Pizza Kitchen Employee
Kurt Warner just can't stop winning over NFL fans with his sage quarterbacking and stock boy humbleness, so even if he doesn't make it to Canton we can all agree he's an exceptional human being, right? Behold a dissenter....

According To This Man's Pus-Filled Foot, The Vikings Are The New Team Of Destiny
Just look at this man's foot. A reader, who wishes to remain anonymous, noticed the throbbing blister resembled the Vikings' helmet horn, thus guaranteeing victory. Or possible amputation due to diabetes, but let's stay positive....

Defense Wins The Weekend
In sports, everyone is a winner—some people just win better than others. Like NFL defensive units who shut down their opponents and made all the difference in first-round playoff wins. When they bothered to show up....

BREAKING: Jim Mora Fired
Jay Glazer just tweeted the news a couple minutes ago. And Glazer is blissfully never wrong. I've always thought Jim Mora 2 looks like an Eskimo. That's probably a wrong assumption....

Star Spitting Is Worst Thing To Happen In Dallas Since Kennedy Assassination
An Eagles fan/employee "defiled" Cowboys Stadium with a vicious (and viscous) attack on the city of Dallas, football fans, and basic human decency. He spit on the star at midfield. Twice. Hey, that artificial turf is expensive to steam clean!...

Reruns Win The Weekend
In sports, everyone is a winner—some people just win better than others. Like the NFL teams who beat another team just to win the right to play that same team again. Why did they even bother?...

Do You Believe In Omens?
If you do, I hope you're not a Yankee fan like me. Because the cracks are starting to show....

Yankees' Loss Inspires Frantic Search For New Small-Sample-Size Scapegoat
The Yankees lost 7-6 yesterday, and if it wasn't Girardi's fault, it was Burnett's fault or Hughes' fault or Swisher's fault, three men demonstrating an unmanly lack of clutch, unlike the New York media's new darling of clutch, Alex Rodriguez....

Awful Umpiring: The Human Element, They Said
Is this the worst postseason umpiring we've seen since Eric Gregg and Livan Hernandez?...

Paranoid Angels Fans Accuse Mariano Rivera Of Throwing Spitballs
Angels fans have lost their freaking minds over the video below, which allegedly catches Yankees closer Mariano Rivera in the act of spitting on a baseball, right there in front of God and Joe Buck and 45,000 fans....

Phillies, Angels Team Up To Stop Yankees
A simple error by the MLB web team or wishful thinking by our Buddy Bud? Or is C.C. Sabathia so intimidating it takes the Angels lineup and all four Philly starters to bring him down?...

Baseball's Robot Revolution Is Coming
The umpires managed to not screw up the Phillies-Rockies game last night (I think), but that hasn't stopped people from continuing to talk about how horrible they are. Today's solution? Let's turn baseball into tennis!...