life-lessons Page 5 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
This HOA President Takes His Job Way Too Seriously
Members of the Westwind Home Owners Association recently received an email—which was forwarded to us by a helpful tipster—from their organization's president, who has had it up to here with people not cleaning up after dogs who poop in the neighborhood. But don't worry, this HOA president has a fool...
“Hey Ungrateful Quitter": Emails From An Angry Lacrosse Coach
Consider this your latest reminder that lacrosse is the worst. What follows is an email exchange, forwarded to us by a tipster, that took place between an angry lacrosse coach, one of his players, and that player's parents. It begins with the player telling his coach that he won't be able to attend ...
Rec League Softball Player Writes Inspirational Poem For His Team
Here's a rec league email that is a departure from the overwrought screeds we are accustomed to receiving. This softball player decided to send his teammates a motivational email the morning after a tough loss, but instead of chiding them for their lack of hustle or giving a strategic dissertation, ...
Little League Coach Melts Down; Parent Urges Therapy And Medication
A tipster passed along this email exchange from a recent little league dispute that is just a wonderful example of how stupid and petty and irrational children can be. These kids, especially whichever little tyke wrote the scathing reply, have got some real 50-cent words in their back pockets, too. ...
![Tennis Channel CEO: Comcast Battle Like "Being Raped By Brutal Captor" [UPDATE]](https://images.deadspin.com/tr:w-900/18qivwajrb351jpg.jpg)
Tennis Channel CEO: Comcast Battle Like "Being Raped By Brutal Captor" [UPDATE]
Two weeks ago, a federal appeals court ruled that Comcast did not have to put Tennis Channel on its basic cable service and could, instead, throw it on a more-expensive sports tier. The court overturned an FCC ruling in the process. Tennis Channel was unhappy about this. In fact, Tennis Channel CEO ...
Delta Gamma Promises To Punish The Girl Who Wrote That Batshit Letter
This letter, which was sent by a University of Maryland sorority sister to her "fucking AWKWARD" sisters, is a gift to the world and should be cherished by all those who are fortunate enough to read it. The Delta Gamma president and executive director, however, do not feel the same way. They have is...
"WE FUCKING SUCK SO FAR": A Sorority Girl Lashes Out At Her Sisters
I always like to picture sororities as places where college girls stage elaborately decorated mixers and then spend the rest of the week gouging out each other's eyes. And thankfully, the remarkable email you're about to read proves all of my theories correct. From reader Erik: "This is from the U...
This Is The Letter You Get From The Neighbors After You Get Drunk, Pee On Their Couch, And Run Around Their House While Wearing Your Shirt As A Cape
"Frank" had a hell of a weekend. We're told he remembers none of it, but his next-door neighbors sure can. Frank somehow ended up in their apartment on Saturday, his shirt tied around his neck like a cape. It was mostly downhill from there....
Profane Rant By D-III Christian College's Golf Coach Is A Thing To Behold
You could forward through the first 1:55 of this clip to get to the yelling and the screaming and the oh-so-many bad words. You could. But you shouldn't, because the buildup is what makes the explosion so great. Calm, helpful strategy gives way to praise for the one player who shot a decent round,...
More Angry Voicemails: Crazy Self-Described "Lesbian On Top" Leaves Crazy Message
Ever get a phone call from someone that was wrong number and wonder if it wasn't a wrong number at all, that it was just some crazy person dialing random numbers so that they could hear someone's voice? Reader Sebastian knows the feeling:...
This Might Be The World's Most Ingenious Prank Phone Call
Reader John emailed me this week with this audio of a prank conference call he set up between two pizza joints. He explains his methodology thusly: ...
The 10 Rules Of Pimping, As Written By An Actual (Alleged) Pimp
Steven McDaniel, of Long Island, NY, was arrested and charged today with running a prostitution and heroin ring. Among the items seized by police was a handwritten list of the "Rule's 2 Da Game of Hoez!!!" Thanks to the Smoking Gun, we proudly present that list, quite sic'd....
The Time Has Come For America's Flight Attendants To Shut Up
I think we can all agree that the emcee-ization of America's flight attendants has grown steadily worse over the past decade. And today, reader Kurt has sent us (and Gawker) arguably the nadir of flight attendant pep talks. I must warn you in advance that these will be among the two most painfully a...
"I Would Like To Extend You A Counter-Offer To Suck My Dick": A Rejected Jobseeker Sends The Padres The Best Letter Ever
Taylor Grey Meyer estimates that she applied for a job with the San Diego Padres at least 30 times since moving to Coronado, Calif. Initially, in the sales office; but as she was alternately rejected and ignored, she lowered her sights. This past March, she applied for a minimum-wage job selling tic...
Captain Mike Dixon: Women Arrested For Allegedly "Exposing Their Sexual Organs" On Golf Course
We are equal opportunity mockers here at Deadspin, so it is only fair that when we make fun of dudes whipping out their penises on a golf course, we do the same for women and their sexual organs. This time, however, it only took a phone call, not a shameful letter to expose the offenders....
Manny Ramirez's Dreads Will Cause Drug Use, Abortion, Gayness, Blindness, Fan Tells The A's Triple-A Affiliate In Insane Voicemail
This disgruntled fan of the Sacramento River Cats would like you to know that she is NOT fuddy duddy. Nor is she a crackpot. She just thinks that Manny Ramirez's dreadlocks are the reason that "unwholesomeness" is spreading across the American landscape. I strongly urge you to listen to this voic...
“At Least I Am Not Raising A Pussy Rugby Player”: Rec League Softball Coach Taunts Concussed Player
We love us some overwrought rec league emails. Today's comes from a Wednesday night non-competitive softball league in the suburbs of an unnamed American city. One player member informed his teammates last night via email that he won't be able to make tonight's games because of an injury suffered ye...
"I Am Sorry If I Had Disappoint You": A Dialogue Between An Extremely Frustrated Gamer And <em>Madden</em> Tech Support
From tipster "Peter King" comes this transcript of his encounter with Electronic Arts tech support. Mr. "King" comes bearing questions about his online Madden league. Manish from tech support brings up a nonexistent "online pass." Relations deteriorate pretty quickly from there. Watch as our Madden ...
It Takes A Special Kind Of Mom To Disown Her Child Over Voicemail
Once in a while, we're offered a glimpse into the dark heart of the American family. The above voicemail is one such instance. Reader Ben provides the background:...
Another Angry Voicemail: "What In The Hell's Wrong With You?" Said The Tebow Fan To The Local TV Station
Another day, another angry voicemail. This one comes to us from a Pittsburgh TV anchor, who writes in:...