life Page 10 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Let's See How Eagles Fans Are Dealing With This
The Eagles pulverized the Vikings, and, greased poles or no, the party spilled out of the stadium and extended seemingly the length of Broad Street. Here are some brief snapshots of Philadelphia, which we presume has canceled Monday....

There Was Violence At The Eagles Tailgate
The Eagles have the late game today, which probably isn’t the best-case scenario for Philadelphia. People have been tailgating since 6 a.m. Maybe earlier. The parking lots were a sea of trash by mid-afternoon....

They’ve Greased Poles In Philadelphia In Preparation For The Eagles Game
People in Philadelphia are nervous today. It’s not just about tonight’s NFC title game against the Minnesota Vikings. They’re nervous what might happen if the Eagles actually win and advance to the Super Bowl....

It’s Been A Very Easy Week To Be An Eagles Fan In The News
Philadelphia seemed already out of Eagles stories when a week ago I read the headline “Eagles Pep Band Ready for Big Game.” Where do you go after a story on whether the four guys who play the Eagles’ fight song after touchdowns are ready for the intensity of a playoff game?...

Dolphin Owned To Death By Octopus
Your continued existence in this world is in many ways determined by how fortunately things break for you in the aftermath of a mistake. Some people step into traffic while looking at their phone and escape with nothing more than the particular fright that results from an unseen car coming to a scre...

Cops Say An Eagles Fan Punched A Police Horse After Being Ejected From The Stadium
A Philadelphia man was arrested on Saturday after police say he punched a police horse after being ejected from the Linc during the Eagles’ 15-10 win over the Falcons....

Liverpool And Barcelona Agree To £142 Million Transfer Fee For Philippe Coutinho
The once-dead Coutinho-to-Barcelona transfer, a hot rumor of the post-Neywatch soccer landscape, is now, suddenly, a done deal: today Barcelona and Liverpool reportedly agreed to a £142 million transfer fee that will send the midfielder to Catalonia. Per ESPN:...

The Coutinho-To-Barcelona Transfer Saga Is Back On, And Might Actually Happen This Time
This past summer was a great one for aficionados of melodramatic transfer window soap operas. The most passion-inflamed and drama-filled ones were the two Barcelona-based series, NeyWatch and One Life to Liverpool. NeyWatch, you probably remember, starred the impossibly hunky Neymar and detailed the...

The "Shit Bandit," A Mad Pooper Copycat, Torments Arkansas Household
A truly unfortunate woman in Little Rock, Ark. is the victim of one of the shittiest possible crimes: a mad poopening....

NFL Heiress Arrested After Sloppy Street Altercation
Jacqueline Kent Cooke, daughter of former Skins owner Jack Kent Cooke, was arrested last night after getting into an altercation with a man on an Upper East Side sidewalk....

How Steven Seagal Became A Useful Puppet For Post-Soviet Dictators
On a crisp November morning in Moscow, Steven Seagal found himself within the walls of the Grand Kremlin Palace, seated across from Vladimir Putin, the most powerful man in the Russian Federation. Dressed in a blood-red kimono and black trousers—a throwback to his days as a martial artist—Seagal obs...

Enjoy This Lovely Christmas Moment
Last weekend, Santa made a preseason appearance at the Tampa Bay Beach Bums Operation Santa Charity Volleyball Tournament to deliver a toy to a very lucky nine-year-old. He opted not to use a sleigh, instead skydiving into the beach but before that into a tree and a lightpole....

We Live In Hell
Alabama senate candidate Roy Moore, who has been multiply and credibly accused of sexually preying on teenage girls, recently sent a mailer to voters in order to convince them that his opponent, Doug Jones, is the wrong man for the job. Please take note of the first bullet point here:...

Seattle Sounders Fans Are Hopping Mad At Beer
I have, myself, been mad at beer. One time I drank several too many Smithwick’s at a pub quiz, and the following morning had the worst beer shits in the history of mankind. Fuckin’ beer! This is not like that: Seattle Sounders fans are mad at beer for, like, appropriation, or whatever....

Another Mad Pooper Has Struck Near Buffalo
The town of Orchard Park, N.Y., home of the Bills, has been soiled by a person leaving poops in places where they shouldn’t. This unrestrained defecator’s modus operandi sounds very much like the infamous Mad Pooper of Colorado Springs....

Here's The Weird Song James Dolan Wrote For The Deadspin Awards
Our own Dave McKenna wrote a profile of James Dolan last year, and so he has Dolan’s contact information. Half-jokingly, we told McKenna to reach out to Dolan and ask if he wanted to participate in this year’s Deadspin Awards. Much to our bewilderment, we got this:...

Australian MP's Brain Goes On Short, Strange Journey
Australia has been recently gripped by a heated debate over whether same-sex couples should be allowed to marry. Last week, the majority of Australians voted to legalize same-sex marriage, which apparently caused MP Bob Katter, who had previously opposed the legalization of gay marriage, to soften h...

Ohio Supreme Court Justice Bill O'Neill Wants You To Know He Has Fucked
The last time we saw Ohio Supreme Court Justice and prolific Facebook user Bill O’Neill around these parts, he was taking the “draft dodging millionaires” of the Cleveland Browns to task for kneeling during the national anthem. O’Neill is self-evidently a man of many passions, but mostly he loves to...

Self-Proclaimed Lotto Winner Yet To Pay $7.5 Million He Promised To Junior Hockey Team
Last month, various Canadian news outlets featured a heartwarming story about a local man giving back to his community. A British Columbia man named Mike Gould had promised to donate $7.5 million to the Kimberly Dynamiters, a local junior hockey team. The donation was announced before a game on Octo...
