life Page 37 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

How To Grill A Flank Steak, The Steak For Socialists
We are Americans (no, not you, Canadians) (OK, you too, c'mon over here ya big galoots), and we like big hunks of steak*. To be precise, we like our own big hunks of steak: We like to saunter into Bob's House of Steak all bowlegged and gimlet-eyed like John Wayne and order for ourselves some great ...

Yes, You Can Wash A Pillow
Jolie Kerr is a cleaning expert and advice columnist. She'll be here every other week helping to answer your filthiest questions. Are you dirty? Check The Squalor Archive for assistance. Are you still dirty? Email her. ...

Here Is A Cubs Mascot Punching A Dude For Taking His Head Off
This is not the degenerate Cubs mascot whose pantsless existence we've all come to know and struggle to comprehend. This is just some bootleg, pantsless, degenerate Cubs mascot who does not enjoy it at all when people remove his head. ...

Never Buy New Sneakers In March. Never.
These are my new shoes. I have had them for, oh, a little longer than a week. They are muddy shit, now. I tell myself that I will clean them later, but we all know that even if that does happen—even if I do not forget; even if I am not overwhelmed by the obvious futility of such an enterprise—"cl...

Coolest Guy Ever Arrested For Doing Donuts At Churchill Downs
A Kentucky man was arrested Monday after he did some sweet-ass donuts in his Ford Mustang on the infield of Churchill Downs....

Arizona Bro Takes So Many Pepper Balls To Chest Before Being Restrained
Police were called in to contain rowdy Arizona students after the Wildcats lost to Wisconsin in the Elite Eight last night, but all the beanbag shots pepper balls in the world couldn't take one dude down. (For a little while, anyway.)...

How To Fry Brussels Sprouts, And Learn To Love Them At Last
You think of Brussels sprouts and you think of misery. When you were a kid, some damn do-gooder grownup nuked a frozen bag of them in the microwave , and scooped a bunch of them onto your plate next to your delicious SpaghettiOs, and laid some bullshit on you about how eating them would make you gro...

Canned Beer Is The Best Beer
Although I've recently moved into an apartment with three ceiling fans, seven windows, and a bedroom door, I do not consider myself a wealthy man. But every Thursday, my wife comes into a little bit of money, and if I time the transaction just right, I can occasionally buy something useful before sh...

Reporter Captures The Fleeting Glory Of Youth In One Spring Break Photo
Some Alabama students and football players traveled to Florida for their spring break, as many college students do. While posing for a reporter's photos, this well-hydrated motley crew—from the University of Arkansas—posed with their hands, cups, and cigs. One girl in the middle of the photo took it...

Chicago Sports Radio Host Shits In The Studio, Flees The Building
Les Grobstein, overnight host for 670 The Score, is a sort-of legend in Chicago, not just for his encyclopedic knowledge of area sports but for being, basically, the real life Oscar Madison. (See this great old Ben Joravsky piece, which among other things details how Grobstein got the infamous Lee E...

Shut Up About "Clickbait"
Ninety-two years ago, a 34-year-old Chicago man named Joseph Wozniak woke up missing one of his balls, which had been surgically removed by hoodlums. ...

Watch This Chicago 'L' Train Jump The Tracks And Run Up An Escalator
The other day, a Chicago Transit Authority operator apparently fell asleep, and the Blue Line train she was running consequently jumped the tracks at O'Hare and ran up a god damn escalator, injuring 32 people, causing an estimated $6 million in damage and screwing up commutes all over the city. Here...

How To Make Sausage Gravy, And Shave A Few Years Off Your Lifespan
Sausage gravy is deeply, deeply disreputable food. In its typical presentation, slopped across biscuits in some charmingly run-down roadside diner with Patsy Cline playing on the jukebox, it is, in essence, flour on flour, dressed up as actual sustenance by the inclusion of token quantities of butte...

Sorcery And Witchcraft: How To Fold A Fitted Sheet
Jolie Kerr is a cleaning expert and advice columnist. She'll be here every other week helping to answer your filthiest questions. Are you dirty? Check The Squalor Archive for assistance. Are you still dirty? Email her. ...

How To Organize Your Spices Without Driving Yourself Crazy
Before we do this thing, we need to do a bit of expectation management: Because Foodspin is a site about food, and not a site about design or style, the focus of these tips will be on function over form. If you want to achieve one of those picture-perfect spice displays, head to Pinterest for ideas....

How To Make Linguine With Clams And Bid Farewell To This Goddamn Winter
Groundhog meteorologists notwithstanding, seasons are shapeless, poorly defined things. To wit: Traditionally, in North America, the "winter" season is regarded as beginning at some point in the back half of December (the solstice) and extending into the back half of the following March (the equino...

Irish Beers, Ranked
St. Patrick's Day is tough on a civic-minded, humanist boozebag. I love New Year's Eve and Thanksgiving Morning and Arbor Weekend and all the other "amateur hours" that too many self-proclaimed sophisticates haughtily dismiss, but Paddy's Day comes soaked with complications beyond the rivers of glit...

Dolphins Offer To Pay For Majority Of Sun Life Stadium Upgrades
Just nine months after trying—and failing—to get nearly $400 million in taxpayer dollars to pay for renovations to Sun Life Stadium, word comes out of Miami that Dolphins owner Stephen Ross is willing to pay for the majority of the upgrades himself. This should be remembered every time a team tries ...

Let's Try Chips Ahoy! Ice Cream Creations, A Dessert-Flavored Dessert
Remember ice cream? Oh man, ice cream. There are so many wonderful things to remember about ice cream, but first and foremost—more than the carnival of flavors and colors; the various zany, luxurious toppings and swirls; the fun presentations (Sundae! Banana split! Ice cream cone! Ice cream cak...

How To Get Your Kid's Marker Stains Out Of The Goddamn Couch
Jolie Kerr is a cleaning expert and advice columnist. She'll be here every other week helping to answer your filthiest questions. Are you dirty? Email her....