life Page 57 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Here Is A Gif Of Wade Boggs Attempting To Dance At Last Night's Oklahoma City Thunder Game
We're not sure why Wade Boggs decided to drop by last night's Spurs-Thunder game, but we're glad he did. In the fourth quarter, just before a Russell Westbrook free throw, the Fox Sports Oklahoma cameras found the baseball Hall of Famer in the stands—after which he boogied a bit in his seat....

This Is The Letter You Get From The Neighbors After You Get Drunk, Pee On Their Couch, And Run Around Their House While Wearing Your Shirt As A Cape
"Frank" had a hell of a weekend. We're told he remembers none of it, but his next-door neighbors sure can. Frank somehow ended up in their apartment on Saturday, his shirt tied around his neck like a cape. It was mostly downhill from there....

Here's A Lady Pantomiming A Double Blowjob At The Celtics Game Last Night
The Celtics beat the Mavericks last night in double overtime, but it's safe to say that the most important thing to happen during the game took place in the third quarter, during a timeout: this unhappy-looking woman pretended to give a double blowjob for some reason....

Police Have To Use Tear Gas To Subdue Fighting Fans At Wheelchair Basketball Game
Throw out the records when Turkey's Galatasary and Besiktas get together to play wheelchair basketball. They're "bitter rivals," according to Euronews, and their game over the weekend was marred by a fans' brawl that forced police to use tear gas and to make at least 10 arrests....

Raccoon Caught Scavenging In The Stands Of Paul Brown Stadium
On Sunday we heard whispers that there was a raccoon running loose in Paul Brown Stadium as the Bengals hosted the Cowboys. Well, now we have video. Some brave soul scooped up the masked critter and helpfully escorted him out of the section....

Taste Test: Three Weird Santa Candies That Want To Murder You
Our cultural affinity for eating crumbly effigies of supernatural holiday icons (the Easter Bunny, Santa Claus, Jesus Christ) only seems weird and slightly unsavory until you consider that we're trying to absorb their mystical powers into ourselves, and then it makes perfect sense. Who wouldn't want...

How To Make Your Own Mac And Cheese: A Guide For Mad Scientists
Folks, making homemade macaroni and cheese is a pain in the ass. It takes forever and there are a million steps involved and you have to have flour and you have to shred cheese and even if you don't have to know annoying French words like roux and béchamel, ugh, you still have to make the things the...

Good News, Miami! There's More Stadium Work For You To Publicly Finance.
Miami has another outdated stadium that needs hundreds of millions of dollars worth of renovations. A politician instrumental in getting the Marlins taxpayer funding says the renovations are necessary. The Dolphins don't have the cash or the desire to pay for it. Guess who's left? Miami-Dade County ...

Florida State Fan Learns The Hard Way What Happens When You Use A Mirror To Put On Your Face Paint
Go Seminoles! Beat the srotaG! Paint your face like a champion today, or something. (It's a good game, you should be watching it.)...

Last Night's NFL Broadcast Featured A Lot Of Jets Fans Who Were Pissed Off, Ridiculously Dressed, Or Both
Perhaps you heard the Jets lost last night in rather hilarious fashion. The Patriots beat New York up, down, sideways, and into dimensions not yet discovered or even imagined. The result? A lot of sad Jets fans, many of whom put on their finest in turkeyhat millinery just for the occasion. Here are...

How To Eat Your Leftovers: A Guide For Slobs
The morning following Thanksgiving is a bleary, cotton-mouthed, dead-eyed time—a time for questions, a time of Reckoning. "Oh, Jesus, how much did I drink yesterday?" and, "Am I going to die?" and, "Why do I keep doing this to myself?" and, "Am I in Fort Worth? How did I come to be in Fort Worth?" T...

Eating: A Strategic Guide
How does one eat a Thanksgiving meal? On its face this might seem like a ridiculous question, and also everywhere else too. I mean, who doesn't know how to eat? (Excepting the British, of course.) Thanksgiving is marked, more than anything else, by its abundance of tasty foodstuffs; practically spea...

How To Improvise A Last-Minute Feast: A MacGyver's Guide To Thanksgiving
Oh, shit. Thanksgiving is here? Already?...

Incense And Disappointments. <em>Life of Pi</em>, Reviewed.
1. Life of Pi is about 65 minutes of staggering cinematic beauty surrounded by 55 minutes of touchy-feely New Age claptrap. You recognize the kind, with its choose-your-own-adventure brand of spirituality, and God as captain of the ship sailing everyone's personal journey for self-fulfillment and un...

How To Make A Thanksgiving Side Dish: A Guide For Slackers And Overgrown Children
So Thanksgiving is right around the corner, and if you're lucky, somebody the hell else is hosting it. Lost amid all the talk in recent years of various turkey-cooking methods—the relative merits of roasting versus deep-frying; whether to brine the bird or cook it upside down or baste it every few f...

<em>Life Of Pi</em>'s Ang Lee: The World's Least-Cool Great Director
It's hard to classify Ang Lee, whose latest movie, Life of Pi, comes out on Wednesday. He's a respected, acclaimed director—he won an Oscar for Brokeback Mountain—but he's not in any one niche. He's not a purely commercial filmmaker—his one stab at that was Hulk—but he's also not a challenging, prov...

The Washington State Fan Chugging Fireball Whisky At Saturday's Game Deserves Our Acclaim
Fireball is a so-called "cinnamon whisky." You can tell it comes from Canada because the word whisky is missing an "e" and they don't adulterate their whisky in Scotland....

Yep, That's A "Baltimore Fuckin' Maryland" T-Shirt On CBS
It's America's most-watched network for a reason. Coming up at the half, it's Shannon, Boomer, and the others with the fuckin' Verizon halftime report. [CBS]...

How To Make A Meatloaf That Doesn't Suck: A Guide For Unrefined Hedonists
It seems fair to say that meatloaf does not enjoy the very best reputation among foodstuffs. You tend to think of it as something harried parents make, and when their kids ask what's for dinner and are told, they say, "Aw, meatloaf?" and then smother it in ketchup and glumly pick at it with their fo...

Profane Rant By D-III Christian College's Golf Coach Is A Thing To Behold
You could forward through the first 1:55 of this clip to get to the yelling and the screaming and the oh-so-many bad words. You could. But you shouldn't, because the buildup is what makes the explosion so great. Calm, helpful strategy gives way to praise for the one player who shot a decent round,...