liv Page 24 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Naked Idiot On The Field Rings In The New Premier League Season With A Dong

After a short summer break, the Premier League is back. Liverpool hosted Norwich City in the first match of the season today in a game that featured five goals, several wondrous feats of athleticism, and one pitch invader who made it onto the field just long enough to show the world his dick and ass...

This Is Still Manchester City's Premier League

Do you feel that? That’s the oncoming rush of another Premier League season, which officially kicks off on Friday. After the greatest title race in league history last season, the Premier League could have a worthy sequel on its hands. League runners-up Liverpool returned all the important parts of ...

British Man Arrested For Racist Tweet About Mohamed Salah

A 32-year-old Englishman was arrested this morning on suspicion of committing a hate crime for sending a tweet that, according to the Liverpool Echo, included “racist slurs and pictures” of Liverpool’s Egyptian forward, Mohamed Salah....

Manchester City Defeat Liverpool On Penalties To Win Community Shield

Manchester City have won back-to-back FA Community Shield trophies for the first time in club history after defeating Liverpool 5-4 on penalties. Brazilian youngster Gabriel Jesus was the hero for Manchester City, scoring the winning penalty after Claudio Bravo came up big to save Giorgino Wijnadlum...

Pitcher Tries A Very Sneaky Hidden-Ball Trick In CPBL All-Star Game

Journeyman pitcher Mitch Lively started and earned a win in the Chinese Professional Baseball League’s all-star game over the weekend, pitching two innings against the Taiwanese national team. More importantly, he started his second inning of work off with a rather impressive hidden-ball trick....

Eleven Years After The Greatest Match Ever: A Federer-Nadal Wimbledon Liveblog

Novak Djokovic awaits in the final. Either Roger Federer or Rafael Nadal will join him after today’s semifinal. GOATs are grazing everywhere the eye can see. Roger has mastered the grass and Wimbledon is historically his home turf, but Rafa has beaten him here before—famously, in their 2008 final, t...

Manchester United Travel Halfway Around The World And Still Can't Escape Liverpool Fans' Trolling

If you had to point at a single day that represents the absolute nadir of being a 21st-Century Manchester United fan, you could make a strong case that today, July 11, 2019, is that day. The team itself is a joke. Their best player desperately wants out. Both the Red Devils’ biggest rivals are in pe...

Waiting For The Revolution At Soccer Analytics Bootcamp

When the 2019 Champions League final between Liverpool and Tottenham kicked off, I wasn’t jammed into a sports bar downing beers with hundreds of other soccer-mad Americans, as I had originally planned to be. Instead, I was dead sober, watching the game in a lecture hall situated on the Columbia Uni...

Some Big-Time Asshole Stole Daniel Sturridge's Dog

English striker Daniel Sturridge, who played for Liverpool last season, posted a video on his Instagram account last night showing the aftermath of an apparent burglarization of his Los Angeles home. In the video, Sturridge says that whoever broke into his house also stole his damn dog:...

Mets Include Two Still-Living Former Players In Memorial Slideshow For 1969 Reunion [Update]

In an attempt to make some older fans briefly forget the seemingly endless downward spiral the organization has been on since the Wilpons took over, the Mets decided to hold a ceremony celebrating the 1969 team that won the World Series. As one might expect with a group celebrating a 50th anniversar...

Does Pro Wrestling's Merchant Of Secrets Have Any Left To Sell?

Wayne Farris, better known as The Honky Tonk Man, demanded Seagram’s Extra Smooth Vodka. It was 2007, and the man who made his name touring the wrestling territories and eventually the WWE with an indestructibly greasy pompadour, a Memphis jumpsuit, and a frequently weaponized acoustic guitar was ge...

Almost Every Penalty Kick Save Ever Is Illegal Now And It's A Mess

The idea, which is not an unreasonable one on its face, is to “get it right.” The less inspiring extension of that is “to avoid something horribly embarrassing.” There are examples that spring to mind when it comes to justifying VAR’s existence—the people in charge are probably thinking of moments ...

Nobody Has It Better Than Liverpool

Along the vast spectrum of possible states a soccer club could exist in, there is a vanishingly small patch that, for my tastes, qualifies as ideal....

Defense Won Liverpool The Champions League

In the end, all it took for Jürgen Klopp and Liverpool to finally win a final was one more clean sheet. For all the focus on Liverpool’s vaunted front three of Mohamed Salah, Sadio Mané, and Roberto Firmino, for all the hype surrounding their attacking fullback duo of Andrew Robertson and Trent Alex...

Liverpool Deservedly Win A Rather Dull Champions League Final

In an otherwise uneventful match that was bookended by two Liverpool goals, Jürgen Klopp’s side defeated Tottenham 2-0 for the club’s sixth European title. Mohamed Salah got the Reds on the board early after a very Spursy gaffe gave Liverpool a penalty less than 30 seconds into the game....

Tottenham Couldn't Go 30 Seconds Without Punching Themselves In The Dick

Not even 30 seconds had passed before Tottenham decided to turn up their Spursiness and put themselves in a goal-sized hole against Liverpool in the Champions League final. ...

It's Champions League Time

Eden Hazard Leads Chelsea's Thumping Of Arsenal In Lopsided Europa League Final

It’s probably not surprising that the Europa League final—a match rife with controversy, low attendance, and teams traveling halfway across the world—was a snoozefest, but good God, was this boring. Chelsea beat Arsenal 4-1 to claim the club’s second Europa League title, lifting a trophy that means ...

Soccer Referee Dies After Suffering Heart Attack During A Match In Bolivia

Víctor Hugo Hurtado was refereeing Sunday’s Bolivian first division match between Always Ready and Oriente Petrolero when he collapsed on the pitch midgame due to a reported heart attack. Stadium support staff took Hurtado to a local hospital, where the 31-year-old suffered another heart attack and ...

Happy Trails To Lazar Marković, A Hero To Underachievers Everywhere

Lazar Marković is not a good soccer player. It would even be fair to describe him as an actively bad one, at least relative to the level expected of players at the clubs that have paid him a sizable salary to do anything but play soccer for them these past few years. And yet, until today, Marković h...