lol Page 31 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

The Washington Nationals Certainly Seem To Hate Matt Williams
The Washington Post’s Barry Svrluga has a deep, perfectly-timed dive into the Washington National’s disaster of a season. Not only is it a complete tick-tock of how the team fell apart, it features a number of quotes and anecdotes from inside the clubhouse, each one revealing that Matt Williams’s pe...

Now It's Manchester United's Turn To Embarrass England With Some God-Awful Defending
I’m almost at a loss for words. Again, an English team meets a Champions League foe they should really be beating, and again they go down thanks to some horrendous defending....

Nationals Blow Comeback In Most Nationals Way Possible
If you proposed the ending to tonight’s Washington Nationals game in a work of fiction, the audience would complain that it was too on the nose to be realistic. But truth is indeed stranger than fiction, and all that jazz. ...

Son Of Jets Coach Caught Talking Shit About Players In Locker Room
The son of Jets tight ends coach Jimmie Johnson learned a valuable lesson about Twitter yesterday. The lesson, as always, is to never tweet....

Brandon Marshall Says His Failed Lateral Was "The Worst Play In NFL History"
That’s hyperbole, of course. Mark Sanchez was right there on the Eagles sideline for this one, and he could tell you about a worse play that took place in this same stadium. But Marshall’s lateral attempt that donked directly off an opponent’s facemask was momentous in the same tragicomic way....

Things Possibly Going Through Brandon Marshall's Brain, Ranked
5. Man, I hope Clint Bowyer wins in New Hampshire today....

God Smites The Manchesters Because England Sucks
England, man. Their clubs spend all that money on some of the best players in the world, get all that media hype about being the best league in the world, and right as you start to buy into it all they meet a couple underdogs from Europe and prove yet again that England isn’t as good as it’s made ou...

The Giants' Collapse Was Even Dumber Than It Looked (And It Already Looked Pretty Dumb)
It was one thing when it appeared that the Giants’ merely brainfarted 40 extra seconds to the Cowboys for a game-winning drive that needed 33 of them. Now as players discuss the calls in the huddle and from the sideline, it’s so, so much worse: the Giants a) did not realize how many timeouts the Cow...

We Are Enjoying The Hell Out Of This Chelsea Collapse
Four points from five matches! Making Steven Naismith look like Neymar! Already as many Ls this season as in all of last year! The worst defense in the whole league! One result away from the goddamn relegation zone! We can’t get enough!...

Cops: Browns CB Justin Gilbert Wrecked Car After Throwing Dip Spit At Other Driver
Browns cornerback Justin Gilbert crashed his Dodge Challenger into a ditch following a road rage incident with a driver he believed cut him off, according to the Brunswick police department....

Matt Williams Fucks Up Again, Gets Booed At His Press Conference
Washington Nationals manager Matt Williams has spent most of the last week doing everything he can to ensure that his team’s slide out of playoff contention continues without a hitch. If his recent handling of the bullpen had Nats fans bashing their heads against walls, last night’s managerial perfo...

Yoenis Cespedes Error Turns Michael Taylor Single Into Little League Grand Slam
Every right-thinking baseball fan is also a Yoenis Cespedes fan—and he has been hitting like Babe Ruth since joining the Mets at the trade deadline—but man this is an absolutely brutal error. ...

New York Mets Outlast Washington Nationals In Crucial Fail-Off
The New York Mets woke up this morning with a four-game lead on the second-place Washington Nationals and three games coming up against them directly; these being the Mets, the question of the day was whether they were fucked as of right now, or about to set up some greater act of late-September fuc...

Matt Harvey: "I Will Pitch In The Playoffs"
Matt Harvey will pitch for the Mets in an expected playoff run, according to an essay published under the hurler’s name at Player’s Tribune....

The Mets Have A Matt Harvey Problem
It’s as if some higher power looked at the NL East standings, noticed the Mets’ six-game lead on the Nationals, said, “Things can’t possibly be going this perfectly for the goddamn Mets!” and then put CBS Sports’ Jon Heyman on the phone with Scott Boras and Mets GM Sandy Alderson....

The Botched David de Gea Transfer Was A Glorious Clusterfuck
Transfer deadline day is always liable to turn up a couple shockers, either in completed deals from out of nowhere or transfers that appear imminent only to collapse right before the crossing of the final T. Real Madrid’s failed attempted to buy David de Gea from Manchester United is one of the latt...

Cool Old Movie Review: Pauline Kael On <i>Tequila Sunrise</i>
This review of Tequila Sunrise originally appeared in 1988 at The New Yorker and is reprinted here with permission from Pauline Kael’s daughter, Gina James....

Manchester United Still Don't Realize They're Not Manchester United Anymore
It’s kind of cute, if in a sad sort of way. Manchester United, once the biggest name in the game, chasing after superstars in the press like a giddy child racing after lightning bugs in the night, hoping to nab one or two like the big clubs can but knowing deep down that it won’t actually happen....


We Want To Help Geno Smith Settle His Debt, So Here's $600
Linebacker Ikemefuna Enemkpali found himself out of a job Tuesday after he broke New York Jets quarterback Geno Smith’s jaw over, reportedly, a $600 plane ticket. The third-string linebacker came out of the exchange okay, though, quickly getting picked up by the Buffalo Bills. Meanwhile, Smith is in...