m Page 6802 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
My Other Car Is A Recliner
We hate to spoil everyone's fun, but with fuel prices at unprecedented levels, do we really need motorized furniture? It seems very imprudent. This guy here broke the furniture land speed record recently by pushing his sofa to 92 mph ("The upholstery will ne're hold, capt'n!"), but what bothers us m...
Drink, Hoof, Drink
It was only a matter of time until this happened: Barbaro-branded bourbon....
There Are Now No Gay Lacrosse Coaches (That We Know Of)
Kyle Hawkins coached the Unversity of Missouri men's lacrosse team for nine seasons, but only this past season was it known that he is gay. And now — surprise! — he's been fired....
Death And Cricket
• Why is the death of Bob Woolmer still such a mystery? (Kind of.) [The Sports Oasis] • The worst sports owners in history. (Guess who's No. 1.) [The Feed] • Smoking up for Ricky. [Puff For Ricky] • Jason Whitlock, hammered at Black Athlete Forum. [You Been Blinded] • Is this the worst trade of all ...
Baseball Players Are Athletes
Seriously, what happened to Antonio Alfonseca? He was always big, but ... wow. We suppose you can eat faster when you have six fingers....
Eye Of The Needle
We continue to find it a sublime irony that, today, Rocky Balboa is busted for steroids. Really, he is....
Your Cheating Carp, Will Tell On You
We don't know a lot, but one thing we do know: If they ran baseball like they run fishing, the sport would be totally clean. Jason Giambi? Barry Bonds? If they took steroids on Tuesday, by Thursday they'd be on a chain gang breaking rocks with a sledge hammer....
We Have To Ask ...
Suggested questions for today's ESPN SportsNation chatters ... • Noon. MLB Inside Rob Neyer: Is calculating OBP more fun after 2 a.m.? • 2 p.m. NASCAR with Terry Blount: In retrospect, should a pit crew even bother with the rear-window de-fogger? • 4 p.m. NFL with Pro Football Weekly: Is it so wrong...
Pity The Poor Buffalo Fan
Heading into the NHL playoffs, the subplot we were most excited about involved the Buffalo Sabres, a team with a long-suffering but rabid — we mean literally rabid; it's in the Buffalo drinking water — fanbase and a No. 1 seed. After they beat the Rangers, it all appeared to be coming together. At l...
Vince Carter Reveals Himself Again
Legitimate question: Why would anyone with any sort of hopes for someday winning an NBA championship spring for Vince Carter this offseason? In the most important game of the year for his Nets, Carter dribbled the ball of his foot during the final possession, ultimately shooting 6-for-23 as the Nets...
The Suns And Spurs Won't Stop Punching Each Other, And It's Awesome
Did you ever wonder just how entertaining those old Knicks-Heat slugfest series could have been had, you know, the actual basketball being played was even slightly tolerable to the eyes? That what this Spurs-Suns series has become: Two amazing teams who play entirely different games trying to force ...
About Last Night ...
What you missed while washing your hand jammies ... • NBA: Do not jostle Steve Nash! Suns 104, Spurs 98. • MLB: What in the world has gotten into the Washington Nationals? • NHL: Live by the Sabre, die by the Sabre ... Senators take 3-0 series lead....
Last Call To Keep Any Of These Close
The general consensus, to this point, is that the Jazz-Warriors and Pistons-Bulls series are pretty much over: The favorites up 3-1 with two home games to close it out. Well, if the Nets and Suns can't hold serve tonight, they might be well be in the same position....
To Watch Tonight
What to watch while waiting for the pizza guy to make a delivery whenever he damn well gets around to it ... • MLB: Chicago Cubs at New York Mets. Can we start tearing out the seats for souvenirs yet? [ESPN] • NBA: Eastern Conference semifinals, Cleveland at New Jersey, Game 4; Western Conference se...
Send In The Clowns
We have always been amused by lacrosse, which is America's oldest sport and tends to put us in the mind of butterfly collecting. It is also the only sanctioned activity in which it is legal to poke your opponent repeatedly with a stick. But we also knew that the pro version was missing one key ingre...
One Attractive Sports Wife
• In search of Jamie Kotsay. [UmpBump] • Take that, Tiger. [The Sports Oasis] • You knew this already, but the Cardinals really are toast. [Viva El Birdos] • Recruit decides not to go to Virginia Tech because of killings. [ESPN]...
Carmelo Anthony Should Live Rather Comfortably
Over the weekend, The Rocky Mountain News told the tale of Carmelo Anthony's new pad in suburban Denver. (Via Slushy Gutter.) The place originally was listed at $17 million, but its price was "slashed" to a far more modest $11.95 million. Some great factoids:...
Grab These Domain Names While They're Hot!
Being a part of this whole Internet business, we are constantly on the lookout for any new outstanding domain names, anything that will further help penetrate the social consciousness. Thankfully, Digital Headbutt has compiled a helpful list of unclaimed sports domain names that we suggest you all b...
Enough With The Anchorman References
As we mentioned a couple of weeks ago, to keep the comments as fresh and outstanding as they've been up to this point, we've commissioned Commenting Guru Rob Iracane to write a bi-weekly Comment Ombudsman column. It runs every other Monday. This is that Monday....