mad Page 43 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

This Is Real Madrid's Best Chance To Drive A Knife Into Barcelona's Heart
It’s El Clásico time again, which means it’s time for the sports world’s fiercest rivals, Real Madrid and Barcelona, to square off in the Most Important Soccer Game in All of Human History—or at least the biggest one since the last time the two met. While the titanic stakes of this game can sometime...

Ex-Player Fears James Rodríguez Has Become A Whiny Little Brat By Hanging Around Ronaldo
Cristiano Ronaldo is exalted for a great many reasons. He’s also reviled and/or ridiculed for a few others, like his arrogance, his lack of sportsmanship, and his self-centeredness. One retired Colombian player is worried that a compatriot of his, James Rodríguez, has picked up a few too many of Ron...

Audience Openly Laughs At Madonna For Saying "I Do Consider Myself A Minority"
Tonight in New York’s Washington Square Park, Madonna performed a “surprise” concert in support of Hillary Clinton. I don’t know a single thing that happened there except for this: Madonna said she considers herself a minority, and then her audience openly laughed in her face....

Report: Mo Wilkerson Was Benched For Missing His Own Birthday Party
Yesterday against the Dolphins, Jets coach Todd Bowles benched two of his best players, Mo Wilkerson and Sheldon Richardson, for the first quarter. Bowles declined to reveal to the press why he sat two of the team’s only indispensable players during a quarter in which the Dolphins put up two touchdo...

Ben Zobrist Has Your Attention Now
It’s good to be Ben Zobrist. After leaving Tampa, where he put in nine productive seasons, he’s now a back-to-back World Series champion, helping bring championships to both the Royals and the Cubs, two midwestern teams with disparate, but notable droughts. Oh, and he delivered the decisive hit to m...

Cristiano Ronaldo Played Like Shit Yesterday
The most shocking scoreline of yesterday’s round of Champions League matches was definitely the 3-3 draw between reigning European champions Real Madrid and Polish giants (but European minnows) Legia Warsaw. How could a team of Gareth Bale, Karim Benzema, and—above all—Cristiano Ronaldo fail to beat...

Zinedine Zidane's Kid Gave Up A Dumb Own Goal
This here’s Luca Zidane. He’s the teenage son of Real Madrid manager Zinedine Zidane and he plays keeper for Real Madrid’s youth team. They played Legia Warsaw today, just like their senior side, and Zidane gave up a dumbass own goal in stoppage time....

Honestly, Joe Maddon's Idea For Twitter Sounds Boring
Joe Maddon did his best to explain his questionable bullpen usage, but this is way more important than the effectiveness of baseball’s best reliever in Game 7 of the World Series: Maddon wants to fix Twitter....

Joe Maddon, What Were You Thinking?
Fuck it, I’ll second-guess....

The Champions League Was Lousy With Great Goals Today
The Champions League is the best collection of great teams and players that there is in the sport. Sometimes, all those great teams and players conspire to do a bunch of great things all on the same day. Today was one of those glorious days....

Joe Maddon Gets It Right Again
Aroldis Chapman, like some closers, is very particular. He hates being asked to warm up more than once before entering a game. He likes to know exactly when he’s going to come in. Joe Maddon knows his players. So, before Game 5, the first elimination game the Cubs have faced all year, Maddon knew he...

Kyle Schwarber Paid Off Joe Maddon's Faith
Anything better than a four-strikeout night for Kyle Schwarber would have been a pleasant surprise for the big beefy boy whose first at-bats against major-league pitching since April 7 came against Corey Kluber and Andrew Miller in Game 1 of the World Series. ...

Salty-Ass Cristiano Ronaldo Flips Out After Teammate Laughs At Him
Regular human beings Danilo and Marcelo shared a laugh during Real Madrid training yesterday after the former did that funny little thing that sometimes happens during piggy-in-the-middle games and passed the ball between Cristiano Ronaldo’s legs. The cyborg Ronaldo must not have had his emotional c...

Hitters Still Can't Touch Madison Bumgarner But A Pitcher Just Knocked One Of His Balls To Fiji
If failure is success in Silicon Valley, then Madison Bumgarner is a champion tonight. The Giants ace, last seen choking the life out of the Mets, is laying an egg in an must-win against the Cubs. He came into the game with a streak of 23 straight scoreless innings in elimination games, but managed ...

Pinch-Hitter Madison Bumgarner Ends Up On Second In The Weirdest Way
With the Giants already down 1-0 in the NLDS, Jeff Samardzija was rightly yanked after just two innings tonight, having given up four runs on six hits....

I Still Can't Believe Madison Bumgarner Is Real
I’m largely fine with MLB’s play-in game, but there remains something almost cosmically unfair about having to win a one-game series when the opposing team can start Madison Bumgarner. ...

Madison Bumgarner Remains A Postseason Demigod
The San Francisco Giants are headed to the NLDS once again, after Madison Bumgarner shut down the Mets and the offense managed a lone moment of competence tonight to get the team a 3-0 win. The Even Year Gods have smiled down on the Giants once again, and they’re headed to Chicago just a few short w...

Fernando Torres Does A Fernando Torres
Fernando Torres must’ve felt some kind of way about Edinson Cavani threatening to usurp El Niño’s hard-earned title as The World’s Foremost Sitter-Misser, so he went and did this:...

Brilliant Shithead Cristiano Ronaldo Had A Brilliant, Shitheaded Game Yesterday
As everyone knows, Cristiano Ronaldo is one of the greatest soccer players of all time. He’s also an obnoxious, petulant brat prone to sneaky acts of outright violence when he feels aggrieved. All sides of CR7 were on display during yesterday’s Real Madrid-Borussia Dortmund match....
