mad Page 83 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Mario Balotelli Impregnates Person
Ninety or so minutes of soccer ago, Mario Balotelli was playing like the best player on the best team in the world. Now he's going to be a father. That's some consolation, right?...
Because This Stuff Never Gets Old, Here's Carmelo Anthony Scaring People By Pretending To Be A Wax Figure
Melo got his sculpture at Madame Tussauds in Times Square yesterday, and in between saying things like "my time is coming," he did that thing where he stands stock-still until unsuspecting ticket-buyers get close enough to spook. There were no reactions as magical as this one, but Anthony's timing...
Joe Maddon Vs. Davey Johnson Is A Great Old Man Fight
"The most boring ejection in baseball history?" No way, man. Davey Johnson and Joe Maddon, two feisty and erudite managers representing the oldest of old and newest of new schools, have moved into their second day of sniping after Johnson alerted the umps to some pine tar on Joel Peralta's glove. Th...
Here's The Rays' 1979 "Throwback" Jersey
Joe Maddon, you're a damn good sport. (Except when you're calling out the Nationals for a "pussy move" when they bring attention to Joel Peralta's sticky, dripping glove.) Any one of your players could have been the model for the 1979 Rays jersey that never was, but you stepped up and threw on that ...
Dwyane Wade's Ex-Wife Charged With Attempted Child Abduction, While Chris Bosh's Ex Is Applying For Food Stamps
Busy week off the court for the two non-controversial members of Miami's Big Three. Siohvaughn Funches-Wade has been charged with a mess of counts, including the awful sounding "attempted child abduction," after a weekend incident in which she refused to turn over their two sons at the time appointe...
The Rays Need To Upgrade Their Bullpen Phone Plan
Joe Maddon had some instructions for his bullpen, but the landline call at Marlins Park just wouldn't go through. He couldn't use a carrier pigeon, and he couldn't send a telegram, so Maddon improvised as best he could: He dispatched infielder Will Rhymes to deliver the message. The human element be...
"I Am Sorry If I Had Disappoint You": A Dialogue Between An Extremely Frustrated Gamer And <em>Madden</em> Tech Support
From tipster "Peter King" comes this transcript of his encounter with Electronic Arts tech support. Mr. "King" comes bearing questions about his online Madden league. Manish from tech support brings up a nonexistent "online pass." Relations deteriorate pretty quickly from there. Watch as our Madden ...
Muhammad Ali Is Still The Greatest
The NCAA tournament came to Louisville Tucson this weekend, and the GOAT decided to take in last night's Arizona-UL game in his hometown retirement refuge. Unfortunately, his Cardinals were trounced by the Wildcats, but that's not the most regrettable aspect of the evening. ESPNU's cameras lingered...
The 6-Year-Old Who Qualified For The National Spelling Bee Might Be An Alien
At the tender age of six, Lori Anne Madison just became the youngest person ever to qualify for the Scripps National Nerd Olympics, otherwise known as the Spelling Bee. But despite the media attention and mounting pressure, Lori Anne says she's not nervous at all. "I've been in competitions with old...
Antonio Cromartie Can't Stop Sexing Ladies, Apparently Married A Crazy One
Antonio Cromartie, he of the prolific loins, thought he had finally settled down. He married Terricka in 2010, and has two kids with her—and two more on the way....
Jon Hamm To Star In That Disney Movie About Those Pitchers From India The Pirates Signed
According to Deadline Hollywood, the Mad Men star and former Deadspin commenter will play a leading role in the upcoming Disney treatment of Million Dollar Arm. Hamm will play J.B. Bernstein, the real-life sports agent who "discovered" Rinku Singh and Dinesh Patel and got them deals with the Pittsbu...
A Granada Player Hit The Ref In The Face WIth A Bottle Of Gatorade After Today's Match Against Real Madrid
A late own goal put Granada at further risk of relegation from La Liga and handed Real Madrid—already league champions—a 2-1 win that was followed by a series of red cards and an eventual riot police escort off the pitch for a referee that didn't grant Granada a late corner kick in added time....
Another Sarah Phillips Scam: "I'm A Writer For ESPN And I Have A Plan To Take Over The World"
On Tuesday, Sarah Phillips took to Twitter. She told us she was 22. She said she's happy that she's no longer involved in sports media....
This Is The Face Of A Hockey Player
Veteran Panthers center John Madden took friendly fire in the first period of last night's Game 7 matchup with New Jersey last night, leaving bits of himself on the ice and suffering the sort of injury that generally knocks most other athletes out of competition. Most other athletes, of course, are...
Do You Deserve That Foul Ball? Consult This Handy Chart
There's some impassioned debate going on in the comments on the post about the couple in Texas failing to surrender a foul ball to the weeping child beside them. What are the real rules, here? Possession is nine-tenths of the law? Children first? What's the right thing to do to avoid the censure of...
PGA Tour Lawyers Try Really Hard To Scare Us Into Taking Down Their Dumb Video
Way back in January we posted this low-quality video, filmed off some schmo's TV screen, of a sound guy tripping and falling as Ryuji Imada prepared for his drive. It was not the pinnacle of sports commentary, but it was a guy falling down, and I thought it was pretty funny....
ITV Cuts Into Champions League Extra Time To Bring You A Very Surprised Newsreader
Three minutes into extra time of Real Madrid and Bayern Munich's Champions League second leg, ITV—broadcasting the match in Britain—cut to the News At Ten studio. The anchor was as confused as the viewers. There was still plenty of soccer to be played, and it was 15 minutes shy of 10:00 anyway....
Is There A Young Lefty Starter In MLB Who <em>Hasn't</em> Gotten An Extension?
The San Francisco Giants just signed lefty starter Madison Bumgarner to a five-year, $35-million extension. 2011 was Bumgarner's first full season in the big leagues. He struck out 8.4 batters per nine innings and walked only two per nine. That's quite good. It is, as you might expect, far too early...
Pepe Dives, Announcers Laugh
This happened Sunday, but it's the first we've seen of the feed involving the announcers from the UK's Sky Sports. At the 12-second mark, Pepe is tackled by Valencia's Pablo Piatta. The commentators are totally ready for what comes next, but they still can't contain their glee....
Rob Gronkowski Filmed Himself Spiking A Megatron Doll In His House
Ordinarily we have a do-not-treat-"viral"-advertising-like-it-is-news policy. But according to the official hierarchy of Deadspin editorial policies, the everything-even-tangentially-involving-Rob-Gronkowski-is-news policy trumps the one I mentioned in the last sentence....