mediameltdown Page 116 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

How Keith Hernandez Deals With Younger Women: "Sit And Stare"
Last night's Mets broadcast returned from break just in time to catch the punchline to 'ol Keith's story about a young lady. "I just had to sit down across from her, for around two minutes, and just stare at her."...

Reporter-Turned-Blogger Blasts Blogger-Turned-Reporter
This is William Houston, former Toronto Globe and Mail columnist. He was relevant, oh, around the last time the Maple Leafs were. He has some absurd things to say about the new Leafs beat writer....

David Brooks Provides Us With Yet Another Reason To Hate Duke (And David Brooks)
I'm sorry, somehow we missed this bit of intellection from the Upmarket Jeff Foxworthy, David Brooks: "How do you construct a rich versus poor narrative when the rich are more industrious?" he mused last week ... about Butler-Duke....

Ehhhh...Fuck Off, Dale Hansen
"That story we had earlier tonight about Cowboys owner Jerry Jones, if that's what it is (and our news director thinks it is), is yet another example of the decline of journalism as we once knew it." [WFAA]...

Phil Mickelson: Your New, Women-Friendly, Morally Pristine Sportswriter Unicorn
Once, not so long ago, a famous golfer was unfaithful to the public image that sportswriters had helped construct for him, and the sportswriters were sad. But then along came Phil Mickelson, and the sportswriters turned him into a Lifetime movie....

NY/Cleveland Media Feud Hits A New Low
Reporters in New York and Cleveland have gone back and forth on LeBron's future for the past couple of years. It's been good-natured until today, when a Daily News scribe took personal shots at his Plain Dealer counterpart. Claws out....

Last Night's Winner: Golf Pundits
In sports, everyone is a winner—some people just win better than others. Like the fellows who talk, write, and tweet about golf, and who yesterday got plenty to talk, write, and tweet about. Old people! Flowering shrubs! Asians! Redemption!...

Erin Andrews Still Single-Handedly Determining The Fate Of Her Profession, Gender
Erin Andrews, cha-cha-cha superstar and twirly catch-all symbol for whatever some columnist is feeling cranky about today, has "made a fool out of herself and a sham of her profession," reports one such cranky columnist. Andrews begs to differ....

The Jason Whitlock Bobblehead Doll Is My Next Purchase
Oh, but if only it could talk. Like, you'd pull a string and it'll spew all sorts of angry, nonsensical musings on race, sexuality, sports culture and social media pick-up lines: "I c u r a tulane grad." [KCStore]...

<em>The New Yorker</em> Makes Highbrow Blogger-In-Basement Joke You'll Set Aside But Never Get Around To Reading (UPDATE)
Ben McGrath takes up the slumming-dandy-goes-to-a-ballgame mantle from Roger Angell (who should be filing his account of the 2003 World Series any day now) and manages not only to name-check this humble site but let drop the bonnest of mots:...

Confused Sideline Reporter Unable To Follow Game He's Covering
SkyTV's Chris Kamara had one job at this weekend's Portsmouth-Blackburn match: Watch the game. And maybe try to pay attention to what happens. He failed miserably on both counts....

After Coal Mine Blast, Writer Asks The Important Question: Would WVU Have Won In The NCAA Final?
Answer: Yes. "The Mountaineers would have taken the emotional hit, confronted the occasion and done everything to prevail." So noted. [Charleston Daily Mail]...

Incorrect Report On Baseball Salaries Drives Country Into A Tizzy
Everyone breathlessly re-published USA Today's annual salary survey, with the shocking news that the average salary is down 17 percent from 2009. In actuality, average salaries are up from last season. Whoopsie....

Statement From DirecTV About Erin Andrews Email Threats
About those emails, DirecTV responds: "DIRECTV executives at the Dan Patrick Show became aware of the threatening emails on March 30 and immediately notified DIRECTV corporate security who then immediately contacted the appropriate authorities and representatives of Erin Andrews."...

So Who's Terrorizing Erin Andrews Now? (UPDATE)
TMZ revealed the Sideline Princess is suffering from another round of internet torment, this time from a creepy Dan Patrick Show emailer, who wrote that he wanted Andrews "murdered" and sexual, violent things....

Who’s Stupid Enough To Fall For A Mark Sanchez April Fool’s Prank? Take A Wild Guess
Remember how I said yesterday that people have become immune to online April Fool's jokes? Well, I should have left STUPID people out of that stance, like Jason McIntyre and the New York Post....

Last Night's Winner: John Feinstein
In sports, everyone is a winner—some people just win better than others. Like sportswriter John Feinstein, who badgered a hapless NCAA VP yesterday over tournament expansion and thereby became a hero to anti-expansionists for all the wrong reasons....

Jason Whitlock Apparently Getting His Becky On, Via Twitter
This message, in which Very Provocative Columnist Jason Whitlock makes a new friend on the Internet, appeared briefly on Whitlock's twitter feed, only to disappear moments later. Oh, Jason, u sound like a dream, too. [@WhitlockJason, h/t Pete Gaines]...

The Steve Phillips Redemption Timeline
AOL Fanhouse hired Steve Philips as their new baseball analyst, just 161 days after the world learned he had an affair with an ESPN underling. Is that some kind of record for morphing from sexual disgrace to professional respectability?...

Last Night's Winner: Steve Lavin's Wife
In sports, everyone is a winner—some people just win better than others. Like Steve Lavin, who is not only young, well-groomed and gainfully employed, but also married to an attractive human female that (presumably) has sex with him....