mediameltdown Page 98 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Presenting The World’s Dick-Suckingest Derek Jeter Column
In a world where every member of the sports media lines up enthusiastically to lap up whatever fluid comes out of Derek Jeter's penis, we now have a new champion when it comes to Jeter's canonization. It comes from Ian O'Connor at ESPN, and it made Ken Tremendous cry. Come take a look at this shit....
ESPN's Shelley Smith's Bizarre Reporting Style Results In Prank Phone Call
ESPN's Shelley Smith did some weird crowd-sourced journalism via Twitter late last night. She tweeted, "neefd rasheed walace to coll me et 310-251-2516. important nreedvrws." A short time later, she tweeted, "ooops . always love hearing from rasheed wallace.....but really need rasheedbhazzard .......
Presenting The Two Most Preposterous Sentences Ever Written About Derek Jeter, As Of 11:06 A.M. Today
Would you like to read the two silliest sentences ever written about Derek Jeter in the mainstream press? Two sentences so silly that if you told me someone had liberated all the drunk tanks within the Beltway and set the good folks loose inside whatever inflatable bouncer passes for the USA Today n...
ESPN's Wimbledon Bid Is The Future Of Televised Sports
Before the decade is out, sports will exist only on ESPN....
Spero Dedes, New Knicks Announcer, Busted For DUI In Hamptons
Not so long ago, Spero Dedes replaced Gus Johnson as the Knicks' radio announcer. Sure, there's no basketball yet, but Dedes already has followed in the law-breaking footsteps of another Knick announcing legend....
Largest Sports Site Posts Messi Satire, Second-Largest Sports Site Parrots It As News
On Tuesday, Yahoo's soccer blog posted a seemingly innocuous article on Lionel Messi's loyalty to Barca. "When I eventually pass on, I will only play ghost football at Barcelona. I am happy there. No amount of spirit money will tempt me," he supposedly said....
If The Yankees Don't Let Anyone Say Derek Jeter Is Washed Up, He Won't Be Washed Up
Derek Jeter's injury-rehab assignment to Double-A Trenton is due to begin Saturday night. He's going to do great. At least, you'd better say he's going to do great, if you want to keep writing about the Yankees....
Victim Of Quentin Tarantino Toe-Suck Fired From Job After Toe-Suck Story Goes Viral
Beejoli Shah, who decided it was a good idea to let 15 friendsicles read about her bizarre run-in with Quentin Tarantino and his nubby toe make-out techniques, was let go from her job at LA-based brand-builder GENERATE last night, multiple friendsicles have told us....
Jay Mariotti's Long Downward Spiral
A California judge ruled yesterday that there was sufficient evidence against former ESPN talker and Chicago Sun-Times columnist Jay Mariotti for a trial on assault, domestic violence, and stalking charges....
More From The Jay Mariotti Hearings: Pulling Out Hair <i>Extensions</i> Does Not Make It OK
Last night we alerted you to the news that formerly ubiquitous ESPN pundit Jay Mariotti would stand trial in California on charges of felony stalking, domestic violence, and assault stemming from an April altercation. That came after a no-contest plea on domestic violence charges in September 2010....
Jay Mariotti Will Stand Trial On Stalking, Domestic Violence, And Assault Charges
"Mariotti allegedly confronted the woman at a restaurant last Sept. 30.... He also is accused of grabbing the woman outside a Venice restaurant around midnight on April 15 of this year, pulling out a chunk of her hair and grabbing her cell phone away as he shouted at her." [BHCourier, h/t tomuban]...
The Comeback Pig: Marv Albert, And How To Survive Any Sex Scandal
This month, Marv Albert celebrated his 70th birthday and joined the NFL on CBS. He announced he would leave his gig calling Nets games for the YES Network—he wouldn't have the time. The CBS job "wasn't something I was looking for," Albert said. Marv, at 70, is sports' most sought-after voice, so muc...
Jay Bilas Can't Stop Talking About Young Men's Body Parts
Last night, Jay Bilas had to talk for about NBA draftees for about five hours. Even for a person like Jay Bilas, who has probably known five hours of utter silence in all of his 48 years on this earth, five hours is just too much analysis. Faced with this challenge, our brave esquire-commentator h...
Why You Should Never Trust College Hoops Recruiting Rumors
They're all made up! At least the ones on SummerHoopScoop, which suckered in a good number of people with plausible prep and recruiting news over the past few months. "Jonathon Paige" was quickly becoming, if not a major player, a name that kept popping up on message boards in connections with rumor...
Chicken-Hatted Lady Confounds Orsillo And Rem Dawg
In the middle of a ten-run inning, Red Sox broadcasters Don Orsillo and Jerry Remy got distracted by a fan wearing a chicken hat, and completely lost the plot....
NBC Apologizes For Not Baiting Commies Or Something
NBC ran a pretaped segment before the final round at Congressional yesterday in which some soldiers saluted and a bunch of kids recited the pledge and a handful of monuments hulked above the D.C. skyline in a way that suggested that someone in the editing room knows his Leni Riefenstahl. The whole...
ESPN Book Gets Snubbed On Regis Show; Annoyed Co-Author Blames Michelle Beadle
Despite the fact that there's been no public disciplinary fallout from Michelle Beadle's nasty comments about Erin Andrews last month, it appears Beadle's trying to distance herself from "Those Guys Have All The Fun," according to co-author Tom Shales. Shales, whose longtime gig as a TV critic resul...
Mark Cuban Says Dallas Punked The Shit Out Of Miami Fans, And He Says It Repeatedly
Yes, Mark Cuban dropped the s-bomb on SportsCenter. But he'd been practicing. This is what happens when a guy doesn't get to talk to the media for a week....
Colin Cowherd, Economist: Unemployed Midwesterners Have Brought It On Themselves
Awful Announcing brings us this video of Cowherd being a pompous prick in the way only he can....
Stephen A. Smith's The One Starting Rumors About LeBron's Personal Life
If you tuned in to the ambient noise of the ninth circle of hell this morning, you heard Stephen A. Smith on Mike and Mike talking about LeBron James. And why yes, he did throw some shit at the wall. SportsGrid has the audio, as well as this summary:...