meltdowns Page 169 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

The Worst American Sports Writing: Steve Yanda
Deadspin readers met Steve Yanda this week when he compared the Nationals' winning streak to Bach's Passacaglia and Fugue in C minor (the Nats have not won a game since). But Steve Yanda writes like that all the time....

The Worst American Sports Writing: Gene Wojciechowski
Writing. About sports. Sometimes it is so terrible it can make you cry, cry like a child who has learned his heroes have feet of clay. "Feet" meaning "buttocks" and "of clay" meaning "shot full of Dianabol." Here's Gene Wojciechowski....

Now For Jason Whitlock's Thoughts On Rick Pitino
Topics discussed: Pussy Galore, Strange Tang, Pitino, Josh Hamilton, Reggie Miller, Monica Lewinsky, Obama and Hillary doin' it. There's something for everyone: rampant misogyny and gay-baiting! This column makes every sportswriter in America look like Betty Friedan in comparison. [FoxSports]...

Our Man In Boy Clothes Is Not Feeling Generous Today
Mike Lupica's ego is to sportswriting what Milton Berle's cock is to comedy. It is an occupational totem, around which colleagues spin fantastical-seeming yarns that just so happen to be true. Here are a few such tales....

Let's All Watch The Media Fumble Helplessly On The Pitino Story
So, obviously, this is the only story today. But is anyone else finding it odd how it's being covered? Go ahead, do a Google News search. "Pitino Paid For Woman's Abortion." Every headline is some variant of that....

For A Brief Moment, The College Football World Was Turned On Its Head
Our thanks to all 8,358 of you who sent in this screengrab (click to enlarge), which depicts Bruce Feldman, ESPN The Magazine's college football savant, fearlessly forecasting the Florida Atlantic Owls into the national title game....

Leitch-Hating Matador Records Co-Owner Loses Home In Fire
Gerard Cosloy, indie-music maven and proprietor of sporty blog Can't Stop The Bleeding, posted the photo you see here, writing: "This was a hell of a way to get out of hoovering the living room." Condolences. [CSTB, via Steady Burn]...

Deion Sanders' Mom Is A First Amendment Hero
The amazing thing about this isn't that cops stupidly slapped handcuffs on a sportswriter apparently for the crime of doing his job in casual wear. The amazing thing is that he was arrested because he tried to interview Deion Sanders....

Nationals' Unexpected Success Sends <em>Washington Post</em> Into A Fugue State
The lede to yesterday's game story: "In the coda of the Passacaglia and Fugue in C minor, composer Johann Sebastian Bach repeats the same chord sequence over and over again, leading the listener to anticipate one resolution ..." [Washington Post]...

Alert: Whitlock, Leitch, Daulerio Sharing Pleasantries On Popular Radio Program
Go listen now. UPDATE: It's over. The nation returns to DEFCON 4. Leitch's verdict: "That went well. He didn't yell at us at all." [DanPatrick.com]...

Linda Cohn Bravely Tests The ESPN Social Networking Policy
60,000 Cohn Heads. Now there ain't but 20,000 Bristol police in the whole town... can you dig it? [The Rookies]...

If Mike Vick Is Repentant, He'll Never Tell
Michael Vick made an appearance at a Humane Society event yesterday, but don't expect to hear an inspiring message of redemption. Don't expect to hear it at all. Vick's talk wasn't for the community: it was for his own gain....

Newspaper Shoves Legally Blind, Much-Beloved Baseball Writer Into Retirement
Dayton Daily News pushes Hal McCoy out the door and next season will join everyone else in pretending the Reds don't exist. McCoy: "My miniature schnauzer, Barkley, is looking at me wondering why his old man is sniffling." [Real McCoy]...

The Bidding Wars For The Erin Andrews Interview Have Begun (UPDATE)
Oprah. Larry King. Diane Sawyer. Katie Couric. According to one snitch/source, these are some of the heavy-hitters jockeying for the exclusive EA post-peephole heart-to-heart sit-down....

Status Of Reilly-Simmons Rivalry Captured By Mediaite's Portentous Colored Arrows
The oracle at Mediaite has spoken. The green-arrowed Rick Reilly is on the rise. The red-arrowed Sporting Fellow is in decline. Reilly is squirting grapefruit juice in Bill Simmons' face! [Mediaite, h/t HabsFan29]...

Twitter Provides More Unintentional Hilarity From ESPN
"As social-media sites continue to mature, the clamps are going to tighten on what athletes are allowed to do with it." Yes, those poor athletes. (Twitter got hacked today, btw. They're just like us!) [ESPN]...

You May Be Taller, But You're Still Beneath Him
Mike Lupica's ego is to sportswriting what Milton Berle's cock is to comedy. It is an occupational totem, around which colleagues spin fantastical-seeming yarns that just so happen to be true. Here are a few such tales....

Frank Deford Has Noticed That ESPN Has Some Influence
Once a week, Frank Deford ambles down to his local NPR station, talks into a microphone for three minutes, then goes back to his VHS library of women's Wimbledon matches. This week, he had "harsh" words for his some-time employer....

Rick Reilly®'s Column Manages To Be Awful In New And Exciting Ways
Rick Reilly® has some kind words for oily mediocrity Rick Neuheisel, a coach whose sole discernible talent is that he tricks people like Rick Reilly® into writing kind words about Rick Neuheisel — and, in this case, into rewriting history....

ESPN Twitter Memo: The Remix
So now that the infamous memo has been passed around to everyone, ESPN has reworked their guidelines for those individuals still confused or incensed by the policy and what they can and cannot do....