men Page 319 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Watch: Abby Wambach Is Much, Much, Much Tougher Than You Are
Tipster Catherine has alerted us to this video, which is an irritatingly scored ten-minute highlight video from Mexico's upset of the USA in a World Cup qualifier last year. But buried within that video is the highlight we've cut for you above, and we took the electro-crap out of it too....

Now You Can Watch US Women's Coach Pia Sundhage Sing Her Groovy Tunes
We ran a short item this morning on the musical stylings of Pia Sundhage, coach of the US Women's National Team. She sings to keep her players in line. We're told Joe Paterno does the same thing with Tony Bennett standards....

Five North Koreans Tested Positive For Steroids Because They Were Struck By Lightning, Says North Korea
We suspected all along that the DPRK's women's World Cup team would provide us with moments of unintentional comedy, but they've outdone themselves....

Science! Proves That No One Thought Hope Solo Was Hot Until She Went Brunette
Goalkeeper Hope Solo has adopted the Brandi Chastain USWNT Sex Symbol endowed chair, and our friends at KCKRS have decided to give this thing the data-driven treatment it deserves....

The US Women's Coach, Who Is Swedish, Fires Her Team Up By Occasionally Breaking Into Soft-Rock Song
Neither Hope Solo's ravishing skin nor disappearing nipple has carried the US Women's National Team to one game of the women's World Cup. Rather, the team can credit the musical stylings of its head coach, Pia Sundhage. She sings. And even though she's Swedish, she knows more than Cardigans and Ace ...

The Dangers Of Handjobs From Softball Players
Welcome to Great Moments in Drunken Hookup Failure, where we showcase three heartwarming true stories of drunken love gone horribly awry. Off we go....

Miguel Angel Jimenez's Impressive Stretching Routine Involves A Cigar
Miguel Angel Jimenez — the cigar-chomping, Spanish inspiration for Cigar Guy — is quite nimble for his age. The workout video is forthcoming: Estirá! Y fuma! Estirá! Y fuma!...

Soccer Analysts Find Many, Many Ways To Call The Japanese Short
On Sunday, the US Women take on Japan in the Women's World Cup Final. It will be a "tall order" for the Japanese, who have a "height disadvantage." Nay, a "major size disadvantage." The "small Japanese" will "lack height" against the Americans. But despite a match pitting "the smaller Japanese again...

Hope Solo Headlines Spring Eternal
Hope Solo and her teammates will play in the Women's World Cup final on Sunday afternoon — largely thanks to Solo's heroics in goal. The worst things to come out of this very exciting thing, though, are the headlines. Here they are, in ascending order of awfulness....

Despite Jeff Novitzky's Life's Work, Cheating At Sports Is Still Not A Crime
Jeff Novitzki was an IRS agent. Not an avenging angel sent from above, nor an earthly crusader for all that is good and pure in America, but a bureaucrat. Somewhere along the way he got it into his mind that it was his job and his job alone (and his only job) to eradicate the peril of steroids in sp...

Harry Potter Versus Star Wars: The Final Judgment
The final Harry Potter movie opens up this week, and all week long people have been saying "goodbye" to the franchise. Lots of crying in your butterbeer and all that....

And Here's How The Clemens Case Might Did End In A Mistrial On Day Two (UPDATE: Mistrial!)
The NY Daily News is all over this one, as things change by the minute. ...

Bud Selig Thinks This Is The Last Year For The Playoffs As We Know Them
Every morning, the fine folks at Sports Radio Interviews sift through the a.m. drive-time chatter to bring you the best interviews with coaches, players, and personalities across the sports landscape. Today: the Commish is ready for change....

We Hereby Nominate Abby Wambach For U.S. Ambassador Of Headers And Beautiful Goals
The U.S. women's national team advanced to the World Cup final today with a 3-1 win over France. Les Bleues tied it up early in the second half, and looked more energized and aggressive than the Americans, up until Pia Sundhage subbed in Megan Rapinoe (a proven tactic by now) and until Abby Wambac...

Hope Solo: "We'll Be Bringing Home The Cup"
Every morning, the fine folks at Sports Radio Interviews sift through the a.m. drive-time chatter to bring you the best interviews with coaches, players, and personalities across the sports landscape. Today: the a guarantee from the goalkeeper....

Female Soccer Players Don't Fake It Like The Men, Science Says
Science has provided another reason to give the Women's World Cup a chance as it winds down this week: female soccer players don't flop. Not as much, at least, as their male counterparts (although we'll allow that the same could be said of toddlers learning to walk). Researchers at Wake Forest Unive...

Look Ma, No Bra: The Women's World Cup Grows Up With Rapinoe To Wambach
When Brandi Chastain scored the fifth and final penalty kick in the 1999 Women's World Cup to defeat China, I was sitting in front of more big-screen televisions than I'd ever seen before at the Bowl-O-Rama restaurant in Portsmouth, New Hampshire, and I was almost eleven years old. After it was over...

Watch Some Very Happy Americans Lose Their Shit Over Abby Wambach's Goal
From the maker of the seminal video of reactions to Landon Donovan's World Cup goal comes this new collection of viewers going bananas over Wambach's equalizer and Ali Krieger's clinching PK. The scale is smaller but the excitement is no less palpable. (Except for the reactions that were obviously...

Who's Afraid Of Hope Solo's Nipple?
Hope Solo, BAMF and nascent sex symbol, shared an ebullient moment with Abby Wambach after yesterday's game. With the match's two heroes and an American flag, it's no wonder the image ended up splashed across the internet. A Reddit user noticed the photo on the front page of ESPN.com last night, and...

Presenting The World’s Dick-Suckingest Derek Jeter Column
In a world where every member of the sports media lines up enthusiastically to lap up whatever fluid comes out of Derek Jeter's penis, we now have a new champion when it comes to Jeter's canonization. It comes from Ian O'Connor at ESPN, and it made Ken Tremendous cry. Come take a look at this shit....