men Page 408 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Find Those Committee Members, Stat!
Man, we're only three days away from Selection Sunday. It came up on us so fast! As we obsess over Bracketology and RPI and conference tournaments, we are reminded that the brackets will not just pop up from the nether on Sunday. Somewhere in Indianapolis, there's a group of old men sitting around a...
Fun With Ron Artest 911 Calls
If you're the type of person who loves to listen to semi-panicked, mostly confused 911 calls from the wives of professional athletes, boy, are you ever in for a treat this morning....
Ron Artest Might Have Sneaked In Some Early-Morning Spousal Battery
You know, you think you know a guy ......
The Only Armen Keteyian-Related News We Could Come Up With
Finally an answer to the question: Does Armen Keteyian like to play beer pong in the basement? Yes: Yes, he does....
The Back Of Ron Artest's Head Is A Canvas
With the NBA's trading deadline passed, Ron Artest finally felt it was safe to have his love for the Kings proclaimed boldly on the back of his head. He debuted the new look in last night's win over the Lakers....
NFL General Managers Make It Rain
The first twenty-four hours of the NFL's free agency period have come and gone. There was a flurry of activity last evening ... let's get ourselves caught up....
We Have Dancing Quakers
You can start filling out your tournament bracket ... at least one tiny little inconsequential part of it. The Pennsylvania Quakers have let their Inner Light guide them into the NCAA tournament. With their 86-58 win last night over Yale, Penn becomes the Ivy League champ, and thus, the first team t...
Roger Clemens... Blah Blah Blah
I suppose this is newsworthy enough to check in on. I originally thought it wasn't, but most news outlets seem to be treating it as such, so what the hell. Yesterday, Roger Clemens said there was an 80% chance that he was retired for good. But then, he also said this:...
You Must Limber Up Before Cheering On The Flying Dutchmen
If this were happening at a powerhouse Division 1 school, it would be annoying. Since it's the Flying Dutchmen (and that might not be a misnomer, they might all actually be Dutch) of Division III Hope College, however ... I find it adorable....
But When You Get Down To It, Does Michael Irvin Make Any More Sense?
Only a little more than a year to go before the 2008 Summer Olympics, which should just give the Chinese government enough time to run Beijing through spell check....
If You See These People At Large, Turn Them In IMMEDIATELY
Sure, you might look at this picture and think you see the kindly, warm-hearted parishioners of The Fall Creek Baptist Church in Indianapolis. It might make you feel warm; it might make you long for home. You might see nice old ladies during an Hawaiian-themed event. You might see that....
Super Bowl XLI, The Loo, And You
Thinking of using the bathroom during Super Bowl halftime? Well, OK ... if you must. But please heed these important guidelines as laid down by the Miami-Dade Sewer Department....
Hey, Everyone! How Ya Hoofing?
On the day that Barbaro gets another good report card from his vet, we check in with the Barbaro Message Board to find that, well, things are getting just plain weird. And when you're talking about the Barbaro Message Board, that's saying something....
Ron Artest Now 53 Percent More Crazy
We understand that the mohawk is making a comeback — we guess — but now that Ron Artest has one, well, we're not really sure how to handle it. Some have said he looks like Mr. T, but, frankly, in this light, we think Grace Jones is the best parallel. And, in the grand scheme of things, that kind of ...
Your Chance To Be A Commenter (Again)
We've been having some tech issues with commenter approval of late, so if some of you non-commenters have been wondering why your witty, trenchant comments have not made the site, that's why. That issue is fixed, but we wanted to take this opportunity to invite any non-commenters to apply for commen...
Harrick Always Could Recruit
We knew something like this would happen eventually. Jim Harrick, coach of the Bakersfield Jam of the NBA Development League, has a player who is making $2.06 million per season. Two mil, in the D League. Where the previous top salary was $24,000. Leave it to freakin' Harrick....
Just Blow Into This Tube, Mr. Tyson
Mike Tyson, ex-pugilist extraordinairre, gnawer of earlobes, raper of women, can add a new dubious title to his evergrowing legend: possessor of cocaine. Yes, its seems early yesterday morning in Scottsdale, Arizona, America's favorite boxer who can no longer box was pulled over during a routine che...
We're Going To Wally World!
Someone asked us the other day whether or not our job was stressful. We thought about it for a moment and told them that our job is only stressful when we're not doing it. Doing Deadspin is the most fun thing we do; the only time it stresses us out is when we're away from the computer and terrifie...
This Guy Is Very Excited About Ken Williams' Offseason Moves
It's a Christmas Miracle! Ladies and gentlemen, we present you with the spiritual brother of our friend Mike Cooper ... meet Ryan Drop....
Meet The Commenting Intern
After an exhaustive search of a rather ridiculously impressive cast of candidates — almost everyone who applied was way overqualified for the job, and it killed us not to just hire everybody — we are proud to report that we have selected our intern....