mia Page 91 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Undrafted Free Agent A.J. Francis Has Best Birthday Ever
A.J. Francis was a four-year starter at defensive line for the Maryland Terrapins. He was not selected during the NFL draft last weekend, but he did sign a free-agent contract with the Miami Dolphins on Saturday. His day only got better from there....

Shane Battier Has A Cop Mustache Now
This is what happens when your team sweeps its first-round playoff series and you end up with a lot of free time on your hands. ...

Mike Wallace Has Dumb Thoughts About Gay People
If you had Dolphins wide receiver Mike Wallace in your "Who Will be the First Athlete to Say Something Homophobic in the Wake of Jason Collins Outing Himself?" pool, then congratulations! You win!...

Jeffrey Loria Continues To Be A Meddlesome Twerp
Wednesday's Miami Herald contained a mysterious report about a mysterious pitching change before Tuesday's Marlins-Twins doubleheader: nameless "Higher-ups" had shifted top prospect Jose Fernandez to the early game, and "ace" Ricky Nolasco to the later one. Now, thanks to Jeff Passan, we know what ...

Marlins Tickets Are Basically Free, And Still No One's Going
You've got a second-year stadium and the worst attendance in the league. You've got the worst team in baseball. If you're the Marlins, how do you possibly make money? The answer, it seems, is to give away free tickets and hope people buy lots of beers....


LeBron James Makes His Teammates Do Pushups
Perhaps Mario Chalmers and Ray Allen thought LeBron was joking when he told them they would be doing pushups if they lost a shooting competition to him. He was not joking. LeBron's drill-sergeant cadence could use a little work, though. There's not nearly enough spittle flying here. ...

Giants Reliever Farts On His Teammate: The Epilogue
We couldn't help but share a GIF of Giants reliever Jean Machi farting on Jose Mijares last night, and now we can't help but share a second GIF, this one depicting the aftermath of the fart....

A Very Important GIF Of A Giants Reliever Farting On His Teammate
Jose Mijares is not a very big fan of Jean Machi right now....

Dion Waiters Threw Down An Especially Nasty Dunk Over Chris Andersen
After successfully dribbling between Jarvis Varnado and Norris Cole, Dion Waiters began to pick up steam as he made his way toward the rim. James Jones was wise enough to stop and get out of the way. Chris Andersen was not....

No, Notorious Hamper-Pooper Najeh Davenport Was Not Arrested After A Police Chase
Najeh Davenport is not a robber, although he did shit into a woman's laundry hamper one time. For a short time today, it seemed like Davenport was both a thief and a hamper-pooper, as it was reported by multiple outlets that Miami-Dade Police had arrested Davenport in connection with a robbery follo...

Photos: Marlins Park Is Satisfyingly Empty
Well, what do you know? It turns out Jeffrey Loria and David Samson were lying when they said the Marlins needed a new ballpark to draw. Maybe they need a new owner....

LeBron James Goes Off The Backboard For The Self-Assisted Dunk
Getting caught in the air with nobody to pass it to is a Cardinal Sin for most basketball players. LeBron James is not most basketball players. ...

Fans Protest At Marlins' Home Opener, Get Ejected For No Good Reason
When a franchise is as committed to shitting on its fan base as the Miami Marlins are, receiving a little animosity from those fans is to be expected. So it's not surprising that a group of Marlins fans staged a small protest at yesterday's home opener, nor is it surprising that the Marlins organiz...

This Is The Perfect Miami Marlins Vanity License Plate
Mierda means "shit" in Spanish....

The Fish Stink From The Head: Is Jeffrey Loria the Worst Owner in Sports?
Now that the 2013 baseball season is under way, let’s take a moment to commemorate the first anniversary of one of the biggest shakedowns in the history of the game—and the con artist who pulled it off: Jeffrey Loria....

Chris Bosh's House Got Robbed While He Was Out Celebrating His Birthday
NBC 6 in South Florida is reporting that Miami Heat star Chris Bosh's house was burglarized, and that the thieves made off with $340,000 worth of jewelry, watches, and handbags. Bosh and his wife noticed that their closet had been ransacked upon returning from a celebration in honor of Bosh's birthd...

This Super-Slow-Motion Clip Of Chris Bosh Celebrating His Game-Winner Is Unsettling
The NBA has been deploying the Phantom camera, which captures high definition game action in extreme slow motion, for a while now. It's use has led to the creation of some beautiful and visually arresting highlights. This is not one of those highlights....

