miami-heat Page 45 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Heat Find A Way To Suck Even In Victory
The Miami Heat hadn't won a game since April 13, and that includes this preseason. So when Jason Williams hit a jumper wirg 19 seconds remaining in the game to give them 75 points, it looked like another loss; the sixth straight of the regularseason. But no! The Knicks — God bless 'em — onloy scored...
If These Two Kids Can't Make It, Who Can?
We feel obliged to point out that Shaq got divorced. We do not know why we feel obliged to point this out. But we are anyway....
Matt Geiger Lives Like A Freaking King
If you ever needed a reminder how the life of a professional athlete is infinitely better than yours is, we re-introduce you to Matt Geiger. The journeyman center bounced around the NBA for 10 years, fouling Shaq a lot, mostly just being bald. And how was rewarded for his tenure? Rather handsomely. ...
Heat Don't Make Much Of A Fuss About Leaving
A byproduct of the supposedly middling, uninspiring champions of the last year — the Colts, the Cardinals, the Heat — is the collapse to level soil the next season. A team that overachieves in the postseason one year is likely to return to equilibrium the next. We'll see what happens with the Colts,...
Alonzo Mourning Came Back For This?
The Miami Heat's comeback attempt down the stretch imploded because of a flurry of Dwyane Wade turnovers, and — of all things — Ben Wallace shooting free throws like Larry freaking Bird....
The Heat Suddenly Look Rather Elderly
Never have we been more aware of how important, you know, not being old is in the sport of basketball than during this Heat-Bulls series. Or, as Blog A Bull puts it, "if the Bulls keep getting this open while an aged Heat defender flails away a few steps behind, the shots will likely keep falling." ...
Open Thread: Bulls vs. Heat
This one might be my favorite of all the first round playoff series. Each team thinks they're championship worthy, and there's no shortage of hatred to go around. There's some hatred in Toronto/New Jersey, too, but it comes from the fans ... I doubt there are too many Toronto Raptors who can muster ...
Free Darko Playoff Pants Party: Heat Vs. Bulls
With last night's wrapup of the regular season, the playoff matchups are set. There are eight conference quarterfinal contests, and the whole shebang kicks off this Saturday....
It's Clear That The World Needs Shaq Now More Than Ever
Of course you've seen him in hot pursuit of criminals in the Shaqmobile, and it's no secret that he snaps into action whenever President Bush activates his signal watch, helping to preserve the honor and dignity of this nation's highest office. And sure he can bust through walls. But now here's Shaq...
Mission Accomplished
So if we're understanding Shaq correctly, the past few NBA MVP awards have been tainted, but being lauded by the current Commander-In-Chief is juuuust fine. No taint there....
NBA Roundup: Love Shaq, He's Our Little Love Shaq
Notes from Sunday's games in the National Basketball Association ......
Shaq On Taint
After the Heat lost to Dallas on Thursday, a reporter engaged Shaq in conversation about Dirk Nowitzki's MVP candidacy. Shaq, sensing the opportunity to get some things off his chest, went off about how the award selection process and said that Steve Nash's last two MVP awards were "tainted."...
Tim Hardaway's Deeper Hole
OK, so here's what we want to happen today: Every half hour, we want someone to call Tim Hardaway to ask him about his comments about hating gay people. You can ask him the same question every time, every half hour. It'll be great, because he'll find a way to dig himself an even deeper hole each tim...
Tim Hardaway Wants Only Straight Men To See His Penis
So, by now, everyone has heard former NBA point guard Tim Hardaway's comments on the Dan LeBatard show yesterday, but just in case you're up for some caveman rhetoric — he'll have the roast duck with the mango salsa — here's the full audio of the interview....
Hey, The Heat Are Over At .500. Wake Riley.
Dan LeBatard, handsome as ever, brings up what everyone's thinking: Pat Riley's kind of a dick when it comes to abandoning his team when times are tough. Sure, he had some physical issues, but it seems obvious by now that it's not a coincidence that when the Heat are struggling, Riley's "recovering,...
Shaq Keeps The World Safe, One Escalade At A Time
It is clear, at this point, that in his dreams Shaquille O'Neal flies over our major cities, combing the streets and alleys from up high, looking for evildoers to apprehend and, if necessary, kung fu chop. Sunday morning, after Shaq had returned from a game in Chicago, he and his bodyguard — whom we...
NBA Roundup: Shaq No Longer Gets To Wear Suits During Games
Notes on Wednesday's games in the National Basketball Association ......
NBA Roundup: Heavy Is The Head That Wears The Crown
Notes on Wednesday's games in the National Basketball Association ......
NBA Roundup: Can AI Save The Heat?
Notes on Wednesday's games in the National Basketball Association ......