Petty-Ass Derek Jeter Yanks Credentials From Radio Host Who Tracked Down Marlins’ Overseas Corporate Office

Last month Miami radio host Andy Slater joined Marlins Man on an investigative trip to the British Virgin Islands, where they learned that the corporate address of the Miami Marlins was a post office box, listed in order to establish the Marlins as a foreign company, for the most cynical of reasons. This was an…

Marlins Man Visits Marlins' Off-Shore Corporate Home, Finds P.O. Box And Many Confused Locals

In a move that is equal parts activism, investigative journalism, and performance art, and is rooted in one strange man’s performative loyalty to the least lovable franchise in baseball, Marlins Man apparently flew to the British Virgin Islands and sought the location of the corporate home of the Miami Marlins, to…

Lawyer Claims José Fernández Was Framed, Was Not Behind The Wheel During Fatal Boat Crash

Last February, the families of Eduardo Rivero and Emilio Jesus Macias, the two men who died in a boat crash alongside Marlins ace José Fernández, filed suit against the Fernández estate, each seeking $2 million in damages. Autopsy results showed that Fernández had a BAC of .147 as well as cocaine in his system at the…

Derek Jeter On The Marlins' Dinger Machine: "It's Big. It's Big. It's Big."

Much of the Miami Marlins’ roster from last season has departed, but the team’s true centerpiece—the home run sculpture in the outfield—is set to remain, at least for now. That’s not for lack of trying by CEO Derek Jeter, who’s indicated that he’s not a fan. But the fact that the statue is considered public art (due…

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Report: David Samson Flipped When Julio The Octopus Accidentally Won The Marlins' Sea Creature Race

This winter has held plenty in the way of absurd news about the Miami Marlins; it hasn’t even been two months since a full news cycle was devoted to Marlins Man complaining on the radio about his lack of invite to a season ticketholders’ meeting with Derek Jeter, ultimately receiving an invite to said meeting,…

MLBPA Sends Limp-Dick Memo About Payroll Slashing, Is Summarily Shooed Off

Next winter will be the real bellwether for the state of MLB payroll spending—handwringing over shrinking payroll today might disappear all at once if the movement of next winter’s studs lifts all boats—but the early indicators of this winter are troubling. The hot stove is cool, there’s a boatload of free agents…