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![Report: Minkah Fitzpatrick Traded To Steelers For First-Rounder [Update]](https://images.deadspin.com/tr:w-900/s1luhqy1au79vdvkketp.jpg)
Report: Minkah Fitzpatrick Traded To Steelers For First-Rounder [Update]
Just four days after Minkah Fitzpatrick made it clear he wanted no part in the Dolphins’ soul-crushing tank job, Miami satisfied his wishes and sent him to the much-less-sunnier city of Pittsburgh. All it cost from the Steelers to get the defensive talent was the hefty price of a first-round pick in...

Steve Young Licks The Boot, The Whole Boot, And Nothing But The Boot
In what should come as a surprise to absolutely no one, an old curmudgeon from the past has once again made the oh-so-brave decision to speak out against the actions of this entitled current generation of NFL players. This time around, those crotchety responsibilities fell into the lap of former 49e...

Should You Root For The Dolphins To Be The Worst Team Ever?
After two games, the Miami Dolphins are, well, you know. Everyone knows. After two weeks, everybody knows. Everybody can smell it....

The Dolphins Are Stale Piss From The Gutter
The Dolphins, a team set up to execute one of the most brazen tanking campaigns in NFL history, were so bad in Week 1 that a handful of players were reportedly calling their agents after the game and begging to be traded. Somehow, Miami was even worse today against the Patriots....

Minkah Fitzpatrick Wants Out Of Miami
It took only one game for the depth and breadth of Miami’s “tank for Tua” campaign to become apparent, and it was being widely reported even before all the players had finished driving home from the stadium that they were frantically ringing their agents, begging for deliverance from whatever this a...

Least Loyal Coach In Recent Memory Demands Total Loyalty From His Recruits
Manny Diaz, who was very briefly the Temple Owls’ head coach before he abandoned his contract without coaching a single game because he found a more appealing job with the Miami Hurricanes, would be better served staying away from demanding pledges of fealty from college football recruits, especiall...

The Dolphins Aren't Enjoying This Fiasco Any More Than You Are
Dolphins head coach Brian Flores declared on Friday, “I have a good team.” What a difference one game makes, especially when that game was Miami’s 59-10 loss to the Ravens, featuring the most points and the most yards (643) the Dolphins have given up in their history. Brian Flores on Sunday: “We’ve ...

The Dolphins Were The Perfect Confidence Builder For The Ravens
It was very clear at the end of preseason that the Dolphins had no desire to seriously compete this year, even if head coach Brian Flores planned on it. Judging from the roster as well as the trade of Laremy Tunsil and Kenny Stills, the Fins seemed destined to suck mondo ass. Today’s game did not di...

Brian Moran Makes MLB Debut, Immediately Strikes Out His Brother
2019 is the final year of 40-man rosters in September. Beginning next year, teams will only be allowed to max out at 28 players. There is a lot we won’t miss about the bloated rosters, chief among them four-hour games extended by countless pitching changes made possible by a team carrying 600 reliev...

The Dolphins Are Tanking Whether Or Not Brian Flores Wants To
It’s never a good sign when, a few days out from the start of the NFL season, reporters are asking a head coach questions like, “So, are you guys even going to try to win a game this year?” That’s the line of questioning Dolphins first-year head coach Brian Flores faced after his team traded Kenny S...

Head-Hunting Kiko Alonso Traded To The Bountygate Team
It’s not often that NFL roster moves are a match made in hell, but that seems to be exactly the case with Kiko Alonso getting traded from the Dolphins to the Saints. In exchange for Alonso, Miami received linebacker Vince Biegel, according to NFL Network’s Ian Rapoport and Tom Pelissero....

Report: Dolphins Trade Laremy Tunsil And Kenny Stills To The Texans For A Crap-Ton Of Picks
“The backlash would be amazing,” a source told the Miami Herald on Thursday regarding how the Dolphins locker room would react should rumors that the team might trade star left tackle Laremy Tunsil prove true. “Guys would legit revolt.” Well, Viva la revolución, because the Dolphins have reportedly ...

Let Michael Irvin Scare You Into Getting Excited About College Football
Today is apparently the official start of the college football season. As someone who doesn’t have a vested interest in a team with any sort of non-lethal relevance, it’s very easy for this day to come and go without much fanfare. However, if you’re a fan of the University of Miami, there was almost...

Brian Flores Says He Played Jay-Z Songs To "Challenge" Kenny Stills, Supports His Protest
One day after Dolphins receiver Kenny Stills called out the NFL’s superficial-seeming social-justice partnership with Jay-Z and Roc Nation, head coach Brian Flores loaded up the practice playlist with a bunch of Shawn Carter’s songs. This appeared to be a strangely antagonistic move from Flores, but...

Brian Flores Loads Practice Playlist With Jay-Z Tracks One Day After Kenny Stills Criticizes NFL's Roc Nation Partnership
Dolphins head coach Brian Flores and wide receiver Kenny Stills have not been on the same page when it comes to Stills speaking out about systemic racism. A couple weeks back, Flores delivered a weak-sauce admonishment when Stills criticized owner Stephen Ross’s hefty support of Donald Trump’s reele...

Report: Inter Miami's Proposed Stadium Site Is An Arsenic-Filled Poison Pit
The long wait to watch David Beckham’s Miami MLS franchise play in all the promised glitziness has hit yet another unfortunate snag: the ground where Inter Miami’s ritzy new stadium is to be built is literally poisoned....

Brian Flores Encourages Kenny Stills To Keep Stephen Ross Criticisms Private, Like A Real Company Man
In his apt criticism of team owner Stephen Ross’s support of Donald Trump, Dolphins wide receiver Kenny Stills has the truth, accuracy, and righteousness on his side—but not, it seems, his own head coach....

NFL Owners Have Always Been Terrible. It's Just That Now The President Is Worse.
When it comes to marrying brain-frozen, heavily armed plutocracy with mindless and quasi-religious ritual, the National Football League pretty much got there ahead of everybody. The number of NFL owners whose general political and social outlook has progressed past the conventional wisdom of the Art...

Kenny Stills Isn't Buying Stephen Ross's Bullshit
After getting called out by his own player, Kenny Stills, for hosting a fundraiser for wet racist Donald Trump, Dolphins owner Stephen Ross attempted to perform some damage control with a limp-dick statement about being buddies with Trump despite disagreeing with him about certain issues:...

Adam Gase Is A Short-Sleeping Psycho
It’s long been rather common to think of NFL coaches as sleepless psychopaths. It will probably not surprise you to learn that Jets head coach Adam Gase is a keeper of the flame of work-life imbalance....