minnesota Page 68 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Star-Tribune Columnist: Ask Not For Whom The Dong Tolls
The Minneapolis Star-Tribune writer who scored an interview with Visanthe Shiancoe on Monday was pretty much just covering her beat, as it turns out. Meet C.J., gossip columnist and unofficial nudity reporter, who happened to see Shiancoe exit a limousine at Trocaderos Restaurant, and got the first ...

Visanthe Shiancoe Becomes A Big, Bright, Shining Star
For the second Sunday this season I received a text message regarding an unlucky football player's unleashed member. Granted, KOGOD's "Locker room cock pic. Any thoughts?" message was less frantic than poor Tanner Cooley's after his brother's unfortunate slip-out, but it was still memorable in the s...

Kevin McHale To Take A More Active Role In The Failure Of The Timberwolves
The Minnesota Timberwolves are 4-15, which is not the worst record in their division, but it's far from the best. Obviously, Vice President of Basketball Operations Kevin McHale will not tolerate such underachievement, so he has rightly fired head coach Randy Wittman and replaced him with the only m...

FOX Broadcasts Some Viking Locker Room Dong
Thanks to everyone that sent us pics of this. It's hard to get emotional about Vikings head Brad Childress' son going into the Marines when there's all this flaccid black cock staring me in the face. Pretty sure Heidi Klum has the same problem when she's taping Project Runway, but we're getting off-...

Federal Judge Blocks NFL Suspensions
Have you made your NFL picks for this weekend? (Just for fun! No money, right?) You might want to hold off on a couple of those games, since a few of the rosters won't be finalized until a judge makes up his mind about the suspensions of the six players who received four-game bans for using an illeg...

NFL Suspends Six Players Under Cover Of Night
So while the rest of the sports world was preoccupied last night with sweatpants and second helpings and trading contracts (and also some things are not related to Charlie Weis) the NFL decided to hide another little nugget of fun in the 6:00 p.m. news dump. Six players—including half of the Minneso...

This Is How Quickly A Game Can Turn
Last night, after a ridiculously silly personal foul penalty by Benny Sapp kept a Chicago drive alive, the Bears found themselves at the one-yard line with a 7-3 lead late in the first-half. A field goal would have given them a nice advantage heading toward halftime, while a touchdown would have put...

Former Viking Would Very Much Like To Hit Brad Childress In The Head
Current Jaguars wideout Troy Williamson spent his first three seasons in the NFL angering Minnesota fans with his mediocre play and current Vikings coach Brad Childress spent his first two years angering Minnesota fans by putting him into games. Of course, all of this happened during the downtime wh...

Feet Shouldn't Be Pointing That Way
Thanks to PFT who finally found an embeddable video of the gruesome leg injury suffered by the Vikes' Charles Gordon. If you've eaten within the last hour, you may want to pass on this for now. There's no update on Gordon's status, but one could make the assumption after viewing that his season — at...

Hockey Player Pulls Off Rare Hat Trick, Has His Stick Taken Away
Brace yourselves: This is not a hockey post. It's a college hockey post. And it's not even a Michigan State college hockey post—although I'm sure I'll find a way to work a few dozen of those in before the CCHA season is over—but when any athlete pulls off something that has happened maybe twice in t...

The Horrible Revenge Of Dr. Gopher
Well, this is pretty much every nightmare I had from ages 15 to 23 ... make of that what you will. But further one might ask, how does a giant, costumed rodent chasing students on a college campus with a syringe not make it on Nightline, or at least the local evening news? It's when the assailant is...

'100 Percent Cheese Free' Apparently Not 100 Percent Nut Free
Meet Syd Davy, better known to Minnesota Vikings fans at 100 Percent Cheese Free (it's Rip The Packers Day, I guess). He was the subject of our About Last Night Wakeup Image this morning, and as promised here's an explanation as to what he was doing at the Patriots-Broncos Monday Night game. Don Cha...

Um ... Go, Vikings?
What you missed while contemplating other uses for your banana holder ... • NBA: Kobe Bryant's season with the Lakers has started swimmingly [NBCSports] • NFL: Cowboys fans to get another generous helping of Tony Romo on Sunday [USA Today] • NHL: Hey, let's all get a Barry Melrose Mohawk! [The Sport...

30 Previews In 30 Days: The Minnesota Timberwolves
NBA training camps have begun; the season is rapidly approaching. Can you dig it? I knew that you could. And so we continue our previews: 30 of them in 30 days. Up next is a team that, due to its role in Boston's resurgence, is like the bizarro NBA champions: The Minnesota Timberwolves. When last we...

Don't Hassle The Hoch! Ed Hochuli Under Siege Once Again
This photo of Vikings linebacker Chad Greenway grabbing a large helping of Reggie Bush's facemask during the Monday night game was on the front page of the Saints' web site this morning; the franchise's way of protesting the fact that no flag was thrown on the play. The genius part of this is that n...

Brad Childress: Our Punter Is A Drooling Moron
Even though the Saints lost MNF due to the improbable late game heroics of Gus Frerrote and the missed opportunities of the Saints (Gramatica), most of the attention is focused on Reggie Bush and his ridiculous punt returns. Bush's 71-yard punt return to the end zone resulted in Vikings coach Brad C...

Reggie Bush Will Surely Bring Out His Slippery Backdoor Moves Against the Vikings This Evening
Even though tonight's game isn't the marquee match-up the MNF schedulers had hoped for in the beginning of the season, seeing Adrian Peterson do his Purple Jesus thing against a shoddy Saints defense could be entertaining. The Saints are giving three points, mostly because they're home and the Vikin...

Black To The Future
This is the year of the coin flip. Just as Two-Face decided if you'd live or die by the flip of his lucky dollar in The Dark Knight, so did Major League Baseball in deciding where the AL Central play-in game would be held. U.S. Celluar, where the Twins were 2-7 this season? Or the Metrodome, where t...

AL Central Tie-Breaker: Twins vs. White Sox
The funny thing about tonight's game is that if either one of these teams had mustered up the intestinal fortitude to win just one more game against the Indians or freakin' Royals, we wouldn't be here tonight. (Sure, your middle infielders are real tough against the Tigers, but what about some real ...

Twins Fans Somewhat More Rabid Than Previously Thought
Earlier today I wondered aloud if there were any Twins fans out there in the Deadspinosphere, because let's face it, they've been kind of quiet lately. I was beginning to wonder if everyone in the Land 'o Lakes was busy with their stamp collections. But yeah, turns out Twins Nation is well represent...