minnesota Page 71 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Remember, Only YOU Can Make 'Toine An All-Star
Maj announced the Vote 'Toine campaign last weekend, but I felt it beared repeating: Antoine Walker needs to be an All-Star. I mean we're talking about 10.6 points per game here, people. 1.5 assists. Over 55% from the free-throw line! He's danced with Michael Jackson; starred in numerous cinematic ...
We Are No Longer To Speak Of Carltown
Excuse my inner-Lukas, but that right there, my friends, is one ugly-ass looking hockey jersey. It looks like Christmas banged "old" and that's what popped out. But hey, that didn't stop someone from bidding $65+ on eBay for it. And you know what? I almost did, too! Someone had to help a fallen brot...
Packers Bong Guy Keeps Putting Lotion In The Basket
You may remember the not-at-all-creepy fellow who celebrated Brett Favre's 420th touchdown in the only appropriate fashion. Well, he has a new hit video, in honor of the Packers' shellacking of the Vikings last week....
Mourning Your Grandmother Is Fineable Offense For Vikings
When we first heard that Minnesota Vikings wide receiver was being docked a game's pay for missing a game for his grandmother's funeral, we figured there had to be a catch. He had a history of skipping practice. He was generally an attitude problem. His grandmother was a Fascist. Something. But nope...
The Detmer-Favre Rivalry Continues
The Vikings just signed Koy Detmer, and he very well might play this weekend against the Packers. I Dislike Your Favorite Team brings back this video of the last time Detmer and Brett Favre faced off....
Teewee Wistings, How Womantic
First, the College Football: • 12 noon — Wisconsin at Ohio State [BTN ... sorry, Comcastic Columbus!] • 12 noon — Indiana at Ball State [BTN] • 12 noon — Purdue at Penn State [ESPN] • 12 noon — Iowa at Northwestern [ESPN2] • 12:30 p.m. — Kansas State at Iowa State [Versus] • 2:30 p.m. — Navy at Notr...
Oh, No, You Didn't Forget About Jeff, Did You?
If it's almost November, that can only mean one thing: Time for Jeff George's annual desperate plea to come back to the NFL!...
Who Knew Large Humans Could Get Winded Easily?
• Sure enough, the Dallas-Minnesota game is the nuttiest of the 4 o'clock bunch. After Vikings' defensive tackle Kevin Williams ran back Tony Romo's fumble about 80 or 90 yards into the end zone, you could see the trainer come out and squirt a water bottle on the back of his neck, because that's exa...
Kirby Puckett, Off-Off-Broadway
When Kirby Puckett died last year, he left behind a most complicated legacy....
It's The NFC North Pants Party
OK, now it's time for the NFC Central North. We haven't seen anybody pick anybody other than the Bears yet. We suspect it won't be much different here....
R.I.P. Eddie Griffin
We send our condolences to the family and friends of former Timberwolves guard Eddie Griffin, who was killed last Friday when his SUV hit a moving train. Word of his death in Houston only came out yesterday....
Johan Santana Is Mr. August
This will be your one and only Bert Blyleven update for this season, so pay attention. Blyleven, to my knowledge the only Minnesota Twins starting pitcher to have been born in Zeist, Netherlands, struck out 15 Oakland Athletics on Aug. 1, 1986; a Twins record. Or it was, until Johan Santana struck o...
Locate Your Local Viking
From Chiefs Coalition comes this photo from ... well, we're not sure where it's from. But we're having a really difficult time figuring out where that Vikings' hands and feet go....
Twins Play On After Bridge Collapse
As we wish the best to anyone affected by the bizarre bridge collapse in Minnesota yesterday, we note that the bridge that collapsed — which, somewhat pathetically, was named "the Interstate 35W Bridge" — was right by the Metrodome and was likely carrying people on their way to the Twins-Royals game...
In The Aftermath Of The Still-Uncompleted Garnett Trade
Though it's still not "official," it's pretty much a given now that Kevin Garnett is going to be a Celtic. This is an odd matter for us to wrap our minds around; we had sort of assumed Garnett would die a Timberwolf, no matter what he wanted....
NFL Season Preview: Minnesota Vikings
Believe it or not, folks, the NFL season is much closer than you can possibly imagine. So close, in fact, that, if we're going to fit in every NFL team preview by the start of the season, running one every weekday, we have to start today. So there you have it....
Teach The Children Skills They Can Use
Say what you will, man, but it certainly seems to us that there's a lot of children being left behind. Kids just aren't getting the education they need; our school system is helplessly flawed. Thankfully, one man stands bravely ahead of the pack, doing what he can to teach the youth the skills they ...
It's A Football Score! Get It?
Guys, We Were Closer When We Gave Up 20 Runs. Go ahead. Make the joke. "It's a football score!" Haw haw haw! Because, see, 20-14 is the kind of final score you might see in an NFL game. But you never hear the joke "Wow, maybe they were playing lacrosse!" Or, "Golly, looks like he should have hit on ...