mlb Page 498 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Ken Griffey And Keith Hernandez, Together In Mid-Game Slumber
Both the Mariners DH and the Mets announcer (on camera!) took unscheduled naps during recent games. One is going to be out of a job very soon. The other, well, "he's Keith Hernandez."...

Royals Set Dangerous Cash-For-Errors Precedent
Catching a pop-up one-handed, at shoulder level, looks really cool. As long as you make the catch. Yuniesky Betancourt didn't make the catch, and he was fined for it. This is KC's solution, instead of teaching him the right way....

Other Things They Do In The 209, Apparently: Throw Perfect Games (UPDATE)
Dallas Braden, last seen hereabouts mistaking Stockton, Calif., for Tombstone, just threw the 19th perfect game in MLB history, against the Rays. They don't do much hitting in the 727, do they? UPDATE: And now Braden's grandmother starts shit-talking A-Rod, too....

Today In Hilarious Baseball Stat-Geek Mockery: Dan Shaughnessy And Pudding
Ladies and germs, I give you Dan Shaughnessy, from his aforementioned Globe column:...

Dallas Braden's Dumb Feud With A-Rod Manages To Get Dumber
The A's lefthander took exception a few weeks ago when A-Rod ran across the mound, a violation of one of a thousand unwritten rules in baseball that remain unwritten for the simple reason that they're stupid. And we're still talking about it....

So, About That Cubs-Lighting-Their-Farts Story
By now you've probably heard the rumor that Chicago's Jeff Baker missed time because he burned his backside trying to light a fart in the clubhouse. We thought this was worth some investigation....

Indians Announcer Goes On Epic Indians Rant On The Indians' Network
Bruce Drennan has had it up to here with the Indians' poor play this season. Yesterday, he decided to go through his scoresheet and give each player an equal-opportunity ripping, looking like a Don Rickles-Gilbert Gottfried hybrid in the process. [WFNY]...

The $1 Million <em>MLB 2K10</em> Perfect Game Contest Has Come To An End
An Alabama man was the first to record a perfect game in the previously outlined contest, saying it was "a nice return on my investment." Commence hacky "now he can afford to move out of his mother's trailer" jokes below. [Kotaku]...

Chase Utley's Dirty Underwear Can Be Yours
Someone on Craigslist is offering underwear purported to have been worn by Utley during the 2008 World Series. "They have not been washed." I just want to know why it's listed under "erotic," rather than "for sale." [Craigslist]...

Cake Typo Gives Bobby "Cocks" An Excellent Post-Baseball Porn Name
The Senate invited the Braves manager to Capitol Hill to celebrate his upcoming retirement, complete with a misspelled cake that read "Thanks For 50 Great Years Bobby Cocks." Bobby Years, on the other hand, is still sore. [DC Sports Bog]...

Ernie Harwell's Baseball, In His Own Words
Go read Harwell's 1981 Hall of Fame induction speech, featuring his oft-told poetic definition of the game that was written in 1955, but still holds true today. [Baseball Almanac]...

And Now, The Taser Video You've All Been Waiting For
Ah, baseball. The crack of the bat. The feel of the grass. The smell of burning hair, as 1200 volts of electricity course through a 17-year-old's nervous system....

<em>Are We Winning?</em> Book "Tour" Details
The last time I did one of those book tour things, it was a massive endeavor that took years off my life. We're dialing it a bit back this time. (Oh, yeah, this book.)...

Now Here's A Reds Funk Song To Make Their Fan Base Recoil In Shame
Readers Seth & Jen watched that wonderful Notre Dame promo and thought they recognized those Midwestern-sports-funk stylings from the video you see here, a celebration of Reds fandom....

Study Of Most Loved, Loathed Baseball Teams On Internet Fails To Account For Actual Internet
Remember that totally, rigorously, kite-flyingly super-scientific Nielsen Co. study of the most loved and hated teams in baseball, according to the internet? The one that concluded that everyone loves the Giants and hates the Indians? Yeah, one problem:...

Aaugh! No Peanuts In Seattle
On Sunday, the Mariners will institute "peanut-free" seating, for fans with the common allergy. Fans allergic to offense will also be accommodated. [Post-Intelligencer]...

Ridiculous Diamondbacks Boycott Rolls On
Because some people think a certain Arizona immigration bill is a very bad thing, many of those same people are taking it out on the Arizona Diamondbacks, threatening a boycott. This is, pardon my French, retarded....

The Bitch Slap Heard 'Round The Bleachers
When they're not humping each other in bathrooms or throwing beer or being sorta racist, the denizens of Wrigley Field are apparently slapping each other in the face. Except they're being sorta racist then, too....

Wince-Inducing Story Of The Day: Miguel Olivo Has A Urethra Of Steel
The Rockies catcher passed a kidney stone during a recent game against the Diamondbacks, then he threw his gear back on and later singled. "I can handle pain a little bit," he said. "Let's play baseball." [Last Angry Fan]...

<em>Are We Winning?</em> The Book FAQ
This Tuesday, my new book, Are We Winning? Fathers and Sons and the New Golden Age of Baseball, is unleashed upon an unsuspecting populace. Since you probably don't actually have questions about it, I'll make some up and answer them....